Girls think I'm gay and it's become a major problem.
I'm approaching 30, I've only ever had one relationship which lasted 10 months and she cheated on me with my best friend.
I have been told I am good looking.
I've been Speed Dating a lot.
At one event, two girls made a comment to a friend of mine that although they found me attractive, fun and had good chemistry, they could never like me because I have a gay voice. Another said I had a gay face.
The host let me read the comments, "gay voice", "gay face", "gay". Gay is the major reason girls tick no.
I never bring it up.
I don't find men attractive.
I used to laugh it off but now I'm frustrated. I've had zero success. in one night I got rejected 5 times for being gay. When I told them I wasn't, they didn't believe me.
Last night, I'm with a girl, we have our arms around each and we're getting physical. We go to kiss, she pulls away and says she only sees me as a friend as she thinks I'm gay. We were about to kiss. I was clear in my intent that i found her sexually attractive.
She told me it was my polo neck. I made a joke and told her I wasn't, we continued dancing, arms around each other etc. Ultimately at the end of the night, she told me she didn't believe I wasn't gay and hooked up with another guy.
I feel like I've zero chance and as an almost 30 year old who has had 1 short relationship with a girl who had intimacy issues (due to her childhood), I have little experience. I haven't had any dates since she dumped me, I've been going out three times a week and I keep getting rejected for being gay. I feel like I'll never have my needs fulfilled. I will not have children. I will not have an intimate relationship if I don't sort this out.
So are polo necks seen as gay?
Is spiked hair gay?
Is being tanned gay? (I'm naturally tanned due to my heritage)
How can I solve my gay voice? (I grew up without any male figures so my early speech was influenced by females - I also had speech therapy as a child.)
When I first started going out, I used to laugh all this off but now it's really irritating me. I used to play football and on the pitch, I was the leader and alpha male of my team. I seriously injured myself and haven't played since. A large part of me just wants to play football and take out my frustrations. The more I get rejected for being gay, the more frustrated I get. Bordering on sexually assaulting her (which I won't do), I felt like last night I couldn't have sent any clearer signals.