Question regarding an old friend (advice from anyone appreciated)

A while back (almost 4 months) some stuff happened between me and two friends.

Pretty much, this girl I was interested in lead me on to believe she felt very strongly about me, and I started to feel the same way. One day my oldest and best friend came over and hung out with me and her. He claimed that he was going to help me out with her. I didn't know what he meant by it, but assumed that a friend of mine wouldn't do anything to try and hurt me. Especially someone who's been a close friend for almost 12 years.

A few days after that, he was talking to her and found out that all the things she said to me about how she felt was just a joke, and him knowing the feelings I had for her, decided to ask her out. Now, he already had a girlfriend, and she knew, but he asked her out and when she said yes, he dumped his girlfriend for her.

I spent a few days trying to talk to both of them, since they both knew how I felt, and they made it off like I was making a big deal, and it wasn't their fault that I'm hurt. The whole situation ended with them telling me to choose if I wanted to be friends with them, and they wouldn't talk to me until I was to choose, and that they didn't care either way if I was friends with them or not. I decided to stop talking to them both, and just let them be because of the strong feelings I had whenever I talked to them. I pretty much couldn't handle it.

Four months go by, and I now get a text from the friend (ex friend), He texted me saying he broke up with her because he really misses me as a friend and can't even begin to explain how important as a friend I am.

I'm skeptical as to if this is genuine or not. I mean, if he really did want to keep me as a friend, why would he do what he did to begin with, and then followed it up by texting me saying he didn't care if we were friends or not and it was up to me to choose? And if he really did want me as a friend, why did it take him four months to realize it?

This guy has always been the "player" guy. He's dated girls just to try to have sex with them, and broke up with them for both getting some or not getting some.

I'm guessing something happened between them two, and he's just saying this to try and make me come around to forgive him and be friends again. But I'm unsure of what to do.

I was thinking if they really did break up, the only way to know would be to ask her if they broke up, but if they did, she might look at it as me trying to stir up drama.

Now, I really don't trust him, nor do I think I will ever again in the future because of what happened. But then again, before this happened, we had been best friends for 12 years and were really each others first friends.

So I'm torn as to what to do. Any advice or insight would be immensely appreciated!


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What Girls Said 1

  • I think you should put everything in the past but don't don't really make it seem that you guys are bestfriend again..tell him that it is going to take a very long time to build back up your friendship and trust with him. Tell him you don't really like the whole player thing and if you guys are going to be friends he can't continue with it.


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