Boyfriend busy with classes? Too busy and slacking for long term?

My and my boyfriend have been going out for a few months now, counting on six months. But now that we're both back in school, I noticed that he tends to fall behind on his work and has to always take time to study, ask for extensions, and catch up with his readings. As an Art History Major in the Decorative Arts going for a Masters, I understand the workload is quite bit and he has work study as well as volunteering, but I'm worried that it's going to take a toll on our relationship.

Despite having three to two days out of the week off, he sometimes asks to work on his schoolwork instead of dates. I end up not seeing him for a week and a half or two weeks in person. Or I make us have study dates so that we can spend time together. He claimed that it's quite a bit of work to manage but I told him it's the same parameter's as I am. I'm an English Major with a Communications minor taking six courses, two internships and a part time job on campus as a gallery assistant. Yet I still try to talk to him each day and make sure we can meet up on the weekends, and my grades haven't suffered.

I know that he's his own person and school is important. But from my perspective he's not doing good time management and I'm being considered as an option. I even broke it down to him that he has three days where he's free to do whatever he wants and it's disheartening to think not one day can be devoted to us. This is especially concerning because he has one more semester to go, and his habits wouldn't be effective in the working industry such as a museum or gallery. I've been in a relationship where my ambition was resented by my partner and was blow off before, and I wasted almost three years of my time. I don't want to do that again, but I want to give us a chance to fix things.

Should I give him more time to get into the flow of things? Or have a talk with him about his time management?


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What Guys Said 1

  • This is a critical time.. not only is he finishing his degree, but no doubt he's looking for internships and the like, trying to find work in his field. I suspect it's not easy for art history majors to find work!

    So he's under a lot of pressure.. no wonder his time management isn't perfect! Give him a break, it's only another semester, and he'll have more time.


What Girls Said 1

  • You need to give him a little more time. During those 3 days, what did he do? Did he study? If yes, he sounds very dedicated and you shouldn't make it even harder for him.