Some of my friends say they've dated people who were in love with the "idea of them".
I've been hearing that quite a bit lately, but what does that mean?
Does it mean they're putting someone on a pedestal or they're just making them out to be someone they're not?
Im curious because a few months ago I dated a girl that I had a lot in common with and was very attractive so that got me a little attached because of how well we bonded and our conversations flowed well. But she really did have a lot in common with me. I wasn't projecting things onto her.
Most Helpful Girl
So, you create an idea of who they are. Sort of "putting them on a pedestal" sort of thing.
There might be flags left and right, but you're only focusing on what you like.
You create an IDEA of who they are, despite seeing and ignoring the facts (flags).
So, yes, in short your guess/description was pretty spot on.
* Great way to figure out who someone really is, is during the bad or rough times. They'll show their true colors then. Which is why ALL of my exes, will remain exes.
I've seen their dark side and they've seen mine. Between the two of us, it wouldn't have ever worked.
lol, but it just means we haven't met the right person. YET. ^-^1
Most Helpful Guy
They were in love, with how they thought they were. Most people aren't themselves when they first start dating. That and the fact that love can blind you to who they really are. You love the person who the person they are pretending to be.
I've been in that situation where I ignored the signs (red flags) of who she really was... just because I cared too much for her.
You see it ll the time when a friend makes a comment about their friend's boyfriend and the girlfriend makes excuses/defends her man. They always say, "He's not really like that", "he's been stressed out lately". The truth is... the people outside the relationship have a clearer view and aren't blind by love/emotions.1
- Show AllShow Less