I'm 23 years old and I have been doing what I love with free time and financial freedom from my own business for almost 4 years.
Those years I was single not for a choice but because I was way too busy and so broke at the same time. I had to do things I now regret, but now I know I had to go through to get where I am.
5 months ago I met this charming, beautiful and intellectual woman which I love from all my heart. I take her with her problems even though they might hurt me sometimes.
Not a long time ago a very stressful event happened and she didn't have the nerves to handle it as good as I did, she ended up twice in the hospital for having panic attacks. She since have been prescribed an antianxiety pill to regain control whenever one of those would happen (if so) again.
I paused the business for weeks for her to regain control of herself. I then slowly started without telling her and now that I told her she said she would allow me some time to sell the business instead of ending it quick at a loss.
She says I either accept this or she'll have to go because she can't deal with such stress in her life.
I currently live in a condo with her, we share every single moment of our lives together except the ones where I see she won't fit (anxiety-causing).
Thank you for reading it all...
What should I do, what are your thoughts on this?
- Should I stay?Vote A
- Should I go?Vote B
Most Helpful Girl
Really, a good relationship is partly meant to be an investment in the future, not a hindrance. You've set up something good for yourself, something you can take even further and give yourself and your future family a decent life with, I don't even know why she would tell you not too. Yes, I know it's stress to her, but if she wants to move forward she needs to actually move forward and not expect those around her to give up their lives to become her enablers.. And that's what it is, enabling. Lots of people do enable those with mental health issues, because they think it helps, but in the long run it doesn't. So you give this up, not only are you enabling her and not actually helping her future, you're also hindering your own.
Usually, there are pros and cons on both sides, but honestly it doesn't look like that here, only that there are many cons to dying what she says and many pros to continue your life as you are.
Never ever throw away your future for anybody... and anybody who expects you to do that for, sorry no offence to your girl, they proved they aren't worth you doing that for.
Anyway, this is how you make your money... if she wants a proper future with you in years to come having kids and all that, what does she want your kids to eat? Dust and memories of when daddy did make money?
Don't do it man. She will have to accept it.1
Most Helpful Guy
It's a really tough call but here's my two cents. I can see that you love her dearly and you've taken her with her problems, but two need to put the effort in to make a relationship work. If she truly loved you then she should be supporting you as much as you support her, I think it's kind of selfish of her to ask you to throw away 4 years of hard work for someone you've only been dating for 5 months, it seems a little one sided to me.
I understand she has her issues and she really can't be blamed for them (I've read the posts below), but it would ultimately be better for her in the long run if she gets the help she needs instead of letting her issues own her.0