When to tell family about new bf? When did you?

Hi, I've never dated before, a week ago my friend told me he wanted to be more than friends & I said yes. He took it rlly fast at first, saying I love you etc things that were sweet & romantic, but way too fast for our first 24 hrs! So I asked him to slow down, he agreed.

I already met his family, who he's close to, & he's met mine a few times. Today he texted me saying his aunt has extra tickets to smthn & she wanted him to invite me. So, that confirmed to me that he's already told his family, incl extended fam!

I don't mind it at all, its just that I haven't told my family yet! I've only told my brother, 1 of my sisters and brother-in-law. My family's not strict on dating at all. In fact, they've been wanting me to get a boyfriend forever! They've bugged me about it for years, and I was always like "no, no cute guys at school"Bc I'm a private person & don't like to talk about these things. But I don't want to keep it a secret.

My family will be 100% chill about this. They'd actually be super excited. I guess I'm just scared? What if we breakup? I know a lot of first relationships breakup, and though I'm not tryin to go into this with a pessimistic attitude that its gonna inevitably end, I want to be realistic & not get caught up and hurt bc its a total surprise. In that case, I'd feel so weird telling them it happened bc I wouldn't want their pity or to harp on it as I know they'd do. I also feel like, its still surreal? Bc I've never had a boyfriend, its just an unreal feeling. I know its intending to be a serious relationship, but what if it ends up not & it doesn't last long? Then I'll excite my family that I finally have a boyfriend & then its over?

I also can't not tell em, bc I live with my mom, she'd have to know. And I talk to my extended family all the time. And I can't wait for it to be rlly serious, because then it'll be so late, and they'll say "Why didn't you tell us sooner?" So I really don't know. What do I do? When did y'all tell ur families about ur partner? Thanks!


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What Girls Said 3

  • I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 9 months now and I still haven't introduced him to my family lol. I'm the same as you though I'm afraid I'll introduce him to family and then we'll break up and it'll be 100x worse because I'll have to tell my whole family about the breakup.

    I'm going on holidays with him in April so I'm going to introduce him then just so my family know I'm not leaving the country with a murderer lol. I think in your case, give it a month or two before you tell your family. Get to spend some time with each other before you involve families in it.

  • I really think you are overthinking every aspect of this. The next time you go out just say "mom I'm going out with___ again and his aunt and I really like him, do you think he's nice?"

  • Only tell them when you're in love