So if it makes people closer aren't there mutual feelings there
sometimes there is but sometimes it's understanding and trusting the other person
Ok so I have a situation similar I would like to tell you about and get your opinion
k I'm all ears
Ok so one night we talked at work and I tell her how everytime I see her at work I thought in my head damn she's so attractive and how I always think about her all day and she goes awww your making me blush
she does have some feelings for you but just hasn't realized them yet or is unsure of whether or not it will affect the friendship. tbh the best way to go about this is gently and slowly. start with asking her to hang out outside of work thenif things are moving well after a bit ask her to dinner and/or a movie and take things from there
Here's the kicker she currently has a boyfriend
well then keep it just as friends for now but let her know what your feelings are. say something like: "I love/have feelings for you but I respect the fact that you are currently taken. I do not wish this to affect our relationship and I hope that for now we can stay friends. if one day you wish to be more then friends just talk to me and I will be open to discussing things." she will appreciate your honesty and your understanding and if she feels the same way then she will probably tell you at this time. most likely what will happen is she will be a bit distant for a bit but that is normal and to be expected. she will most likely end up opening up to you more and get your help with more personal issues as she will probably start to feel more like you are someone she can come to for help.
now there is the chance that she will push you away completely but that is a 1 in a thousand chance as most girls like to know that someone cares and there is someone that they can go to that is outside of most of the problems in their life.
I told her I was disappointed and I understand that we couldn't be together cause she had a boyfriend she couldn't understand why for the past couple of days I was avoiding her and I explained to her I was trying to fight my feelings cause everytime we would talk I could feel my heartbeat get faster. After this conversation where I got everything out I needed to tell her she actually drew closer to me
she now can understand you better then before and she now feels as though she trusts you in more areas (yes girls a have many categories of trust. I myself have over 45 different catagories and each have several stages.) I'm sure that you 2 will stay friends and possibly more for many years to come. she really sounds like a great person for you.
I wanna be more then friends we really connect well this girl always brings a smile to my face
I understand that you want more but you have to be patient. right now she is in a complicated position (having to decide if she would prefer to stay with her boyfriend or dump him and try things with you) so she will need some time before she will be ready to make a decision like that and if she does choose you then she will need some down time before a new relationship. you are looking at at least 3-4 months before you could date her if not more then that. just be there for her and yes you can ask her to a movie or to dinner or both but respect that she is currently just a friend. (if the 2 of you do end up doing something together then don't say anything about it unless she asks you.) and if while all this is happening then the guy dumps her then be her emotional support. not trying to be rude but this increases your chance of a relationship 10 fold.
Like it brought me to tears almost when I was telling her how I was sad cause I knew she already had a boyfriend
My feelings are strong I guess you can say I love hard
I know where you are coming from. I was once in the same situation. you just have to be patient I know how hard it is but it's all you can do. you have done your part and now it's up to her as to what she wants to do. honestly you seem like a great guy and if she doesn't want to be with you then it's her loss. I know that it may seem like a huge barrier to get past if she doesn't want to be with you but you will be just fine either way. you are strong and you are kind and caring any girl would be lucky to be with you. tbh if I was single and a few years older then I would probably be one of the girls you would have a chance with.
Hopefully it works out she really brings out the things we have in common.
I hope it does too. good luck. if you ever need my help again I'm here.
Is it normal that when we are close and I look in her eyes and she smiling I get the urge to kiss her
yes that is completely normal.
Just sucks though
I know but maybe one day you wish will be reality
Yeah I even had a dream once where I was dreaming about something completely different and out of nowhere I heard her giggle and I was even in my dream where did that come from so even my unconscious brain thinks about her
yup trust me that happens all the time for me with my boyfriend
What's my resolution
there really is nothing you can do about it you just power through and cherish the time you spend with her.
What if I never get the chance to hold in my arms and call her mine
then you don't. but just know that you told her how you felt and she didn't want you that way. I still love this one guy who broke my heart so bad but I moved on because that is just what you do. you will survive it you just have to figure out how. the best way is to date other people not necessarily a serious relationship but just to show her that you won't wait around for her. maybe you will find someone else maybe not.
I feel I would really be a catch for a girl
I'm sure you would be
I know this is funny but I just wanna be this for her redmalehummingbird.files.wordpress.com/.../tumblr_static_white_knight.jpg
it's not funny it's wonderful that you can find an image (as corny as the image might be) that represents what you hope that you can be for her
My horse looks pissed lol
lol no it looks determined
So if I had a girl that wanted to remain friends and even became closer is that hidden feelings
Not necessarily. Some girls would be OK with it and others might think you're joking. Girls like me who aren't into talking about feelings and emotions and getting all gushy will get annoyed, but girls who are will probably reciprocate and say they love you like a brother back. But that's something you should be cautious saying because a lot of girls get upset if you are being their friend but really want to get in their pants. If you're meaning this as in familial or brotherly love, that's fine, but not if it's romantic
It wasn't about getting in her pants I told her what really attracted me to her was how well we click together we just always seem to have fun around each other she makes me laugh I make her laugh I just thought we might be a good match
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It wouldn't be a joke
Maybe not a joke to him but I don't know I just can't imagine any of my friends saying something like that to me and not be joking
Ok so can I get your opinion cause this really happened
I would back away. I'm just not into sappy saying like that and it would make me extremely uncomfortable if he was being 100% serious