Are age gaps really a problem?

This guy at my college is 8 years older than me. We are at a good start just friends for now. I would like to hang out with sometime but my mother doesn't like the age gap between us. My father on the other hand does not approve as well. I feel like the only choice I have is to go behind there back. I understand that I am 20 and still live with them but it's my life and they are not in control of my decisions or who I like. Please help? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well look, parents will always worry and it will make them look stubborn and villainous at times. Right now, maybe think from their perspective about how your choices affect them. Consider the fact that once you are 21 their role in your life will significantly decrease. The Age gap is something you shouldn't care about really! its only a number. Hope to have answered you :) If you need any more help feel free to ask.

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    • I still live with them so it is a bit difficult. My mother already met him but pointed out the age difference and how he is more experienced, etc. He lives with himself, pays his bills, etc.

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    • Anytime :) Good luck on everything

    • Thank you :)

Most Helpful Girl

  • They can be. 8 years is not that big of a deal though.

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    • Try explaining that to my parents please lol for now we just see each other at my local college for right now. I have tried talking to my family about him and him and I hanging out but he always escalates into an argument.

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What Guys Said 4

  • Notttt reeeallly. Though that's debatable. Many factors involved. Both of their hobbies, how big is the gap (are we talking Bob Barker's 1 of many 23 yr old wives here?)... females CAN be more mature in some instances (especially now with so many 30 yr old guys living with their mom, playing video games), so it's debatable. I personally get approached all the time by college girls who think I'm at their college (during spreak break handing out stuff, or doing volunteer work), and when I reply that I went to Ohio State back in 94 they go *mouth hits the ground, NO WAY!* But I haven't dated any. Case in point... doing volunteer work, this 1 college girl was expressing something about the work to me, and her convo went as such..."So, like, it was like, ummm, well, like, so you know, like, etc, etc" When she was done, I shook my head, stared at her, threw my hands out and said, "Honey, I have NO IDEA what you just said." She looked confused. I was DAMN SURE confused. If I were to date her, WHAT THE HELL could we possibly talk about? And the age gap was double. So that's 1 example of how it can be detrimental.

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    • What do you do when your parents do not approve? I would like to hang out with him sometime but my mother nor my father does not approve.

    • You're 20. Me? I don't think the gap is an issue on that at all. However, you need to keep in mind that you live under their roof as of now. They're your meal ticket, from a housing standpoint right now. The saying about biting the hand that feeds you? Yeah, that.

  • Sometimes it is.. It is highly individual.

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  • no they're not a problem.

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  • So he is 28? That is a good age and he is likely looking for a relationship, not a hook up, so I say go for it.

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    • Yes he's 28, I'm 20 we met in college last week. I told him we are just friends but he must see more as a friend. My parents do not approve of the age gap at all.

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    • They don't even want to meet him and we are just friends. My mother can't age gap out of her head.

    • It will be fine if you date him. After you are together a while and he treats you well and is faithful, they will eventually accept him.

What Girls Said 0

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