How do I go about rejecting this guy but not hurting him also?

I had one date with this guy. He is 20-25 years old. We had a nice time. Afterward, he said he thinks he is in love with me. He sent me something along the lines of this, "I think I'm in love with you, I know you don't believe me but I really care about you. I have never felt comfortable until you." He said this after one date. I've never had a guy this interested in me and I'm not sure what to make of it. Granted, we did had a nice time and I felt safe around him.

I have told him before our date, that I was not looking for a relationship. He was well aware that I am not looking for a boyfriend.

I do enjoy talking to him, and I don't mind being texting buddies/friends but I am not interested in seeing him again. He knows this.

He is handsome and funny. He has a career already. But I am not interested in going out with him.

Should I ignore him? I already told him clearly I am not looking for a relationship. Do I owe him anymore explanation? Or can I ignore him? I feel bad. I've never had to reject a guy like this before. But I was clear about my intentions and I never lead him on. I was looking for a guy to have fun with, no drama. I feel bad and I'm not sure what is the right thing to do without hurting his feelings.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • dont just ignore him.. but be honest be like hey i told you before i wasn't looking for anything serious and im just trying to enjoy my freedom and learn who i really am before i try to make things more complex

  • For a guy to say that he is in love with you after one date is a red flag, it suggests a lack of emotional maturity and control. It suggests that his romantic notions are based in fantasy and not grounded by reality. It also suggests serious clinger potential.

    You don't 'owe' him anything, it's up to your own discretion as to whether you say anything further or not. If you do say anything then I think that it's important to make things clear immediately and to not leave any room for doubt, because he has already indicated that he can get entirely carried away.

    I would suggest that you don't see him again, at least not for a while. Tell him that you just want to remain in text contact for now. Then just limit the frequency and speed of your replies, so that he slowly gets used to you not being a constant in his life. That's one way to do it without having to give him a specific message.


What Girls Said 1

  • I am going through a similiar situation and been in previous situations like this. A guy who confesses that he loves you and wants to be with you so quickly usually are the ones who are possessive and controlling. Trust me on this. They will want you to stop what you are doing to show them attention. These men are looking for love quickly to feel the void that they have. Its best to avoid a guy like this. Even if you try to explain to him he will still be persistent because he has already got attached. He will keep pressing you to make you change your mind.


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