So I recently signed up for Plenty of Fish as a way of really putting myself out there to meet more women. The question is a message I sent to a girl. Below is what she sent me back.
"That's one of the most annoying backhanded compliments men give out. Look? I'm not "still" single. That would imply that I'm "waiting" to not be single. I'm not. I don't give a flying fuck about being in a relationship. I'm single because I have yet to meet someone I want to be with. It has zero to do with "how beautiful" I am, and 100% to do with my standards. So kindly fuck off with your bullshit"
The message I sent her was just a compliment and a friendly conversation starter at least in my mind. It wasn't intended to be rude or disrespectful so I don't quite understand why she got so up in arms about the message I sent. She sends me this message after she views my profile, which is the following.
"Hello! Hi my name is Q and I'm new here to the Charleston. People describe me as being compassionate, strong, and loving. I believe in chivalry, only for that special someone. I also like to surround myself with positive, optimistic people. I'm looking for someone who's also compassionate, fun, outgoing, and can hold an intelligent conversation. I'm on this site in hopes of meeting someone truly amazing and sharing even better experiences. Thanks for reading,
"What are your opinions? What could I have said, done, or written better?
Most Helpful Girl
I wouldn't have reacted so harshly, but I'll admit I find that opening line annoying as hell too, seeing as attractiveness doesn't have to have anything to do with why I'm single. It comes across as "You're hot, why are you having a hard time getting a boyfriend? What's wrong with you?" which can be seen as backhanded. But her reaction was too much.
The best opener is an honest one: I liked your profile, you're very beautiful, I wanted to reach out, etc.9
Most Helpful Guy
You assumed that every woman feels desperate to get into a relationship. She focused on the assumption that you made rather than the comment on her appearance. You can tell a woman she is beautiful without making the assumption.7