Guys, Shed some light on this reacurring dating situation?

So for the past 3 years every guy I date always seems to turn out the same way. We will date for months, (6 being the longest) they will seem really into me but nothing about a relationship is ever brought up and then one day we'll be perfectly fine and the next he just stops talking to me.. just randomly with no warning. Why does this keep happening?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Are you looking for a LTR? Do you begin the relationship with that hope?
    Do you talk with them about commitment and long term goals?
    How far do the relationships progress physically?

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    • I am but I don't start the relationship with that hope until I am sure I like them, they always approach me first.
      No I don't talk about long term goals because I don't want to seem pushy I wait for them to but they never do.
      It depends, some I have slept with early and some not at all

    • Perhaps you are simply selecting the wrong guys. How do you meet the guys you date?

What Guys Said 9

  • Perhaps there's something about you that gives the impression you don't want a relationship. Maybe you should try being the instigator and bring it up yourself?

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  • I would say something is not happening and they are losing interest. Are you having sex? You say they show interest in you, but do you show interest in them? Maybe you don't show it? One of the biggest mistakes a lot of young people make is putting too much importance on their friends and hanging with friends versus their SO. Maybe you prioritize too much time towards your friends? Do you possibly scare the guys away with baby talk? Do you have a job, or have a future planned? Maybe they see you as a flake?

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    • I'd say I'm pretty good at balancing between friends and them but sometimes they would spend more time with their friends. No I don't talk about relationships or babies because I'm aware of scaring them away but then a relationship never gets brought up when I wait for them to! Yes I have a job, I'm at uni, I drive I have a lot of other qualifications so I'd say I have my head screwed on about my future

    • Could be just the age range of the guys. Lots of guys in that 20-26 age range are all about the quantity. Hit it and quit it! They aren't ready or looking for long term. They only care about the next party or good time, including girls. Maybe look for someone a bit older?

  • Not all guys make the first move. Some don't want a relationship. Any of them disappear after getting in your pants (maybe a few times)? Some guys just want a few fucks and then find someone else to date and ghost you. Others give up after a few dates and still not getting in your pants. Sounds like you are a magnet for the 2 extremes, players and impatient ones. I'd suggest finding a hobby besides dating and get a dog/cat. I'm basically a magnet for the trailer trash loser types so that's what I did.

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  • One reason I could see is that you're boring. What are your interests in life? What do you like, what do you dislike? What do you do in your spare time?

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    • I'm not boring, I'm funny and excitable that's something they would usually point out that they like. I'm a university student so I go out in my spare time with friends. Im into acting and that's what I plan to do for a career and travel.

    • Then maybe you're not dating the right men if you're not boring. Or maybe you try and go too fast or have some other undesirable trait. Would be hard to tell through a convo like this

  • If what you are experiencing is anything like dating online like I have done in the past year or two and it is entirely possible that you are not the only person that these individuals are dating at one time.

    I know that with various women that I messaged online I am talking to several at once to see who I click with or not. It may not be that you have done something wrong but that the person who you are dating they have found someone that they might be more compatible with.

    Do not get discouraged because I believe that everyone does this until they find someone that they really connect with.

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  • Maybe they were mainly interested in the sex and got bored of it or got bored in general.

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  • Sounds like they lost interest mid way and decided to end it.

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  • Are you obsessed with babies? Do you bring them up?

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  • Are you an interesting person? answering that honestly with yourself will provide the first step to solving this mystery. Being dishonest with yourself will prolong the mystery...

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