How do you explain that most girls, but not most guys, have a whole pool of guys they can call up any time for a good time, including for sex?

Very few guys have any sort of alternative if they become single (except for escorts, etc., pay-as-you-go company) but all the halfway attractive girls have a whole memory card full of guys eager to take them out on the spur of the moment, and few of whom would refuse if she wanted spur-of-the-moment sex.

Updates:
By pool I mean more than 1.. I'm not saying girls have a dozen!

Well, I know some that DO have a dozen, but a 'pool' could be just 2...
I'm not asking if YOU personally do that (girls) and good for u if you don't take advantage of this.

I'm asking why is it generally true?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I do have quite a wide pool of guys at the tip of my fingers, not gonna deny that. I can hook up whenever I wanted if I just asked, but I don't because I can't really be bothered at the moment.

    The thing is that guys can be extremely desperate at times, some try to slide in a message every single day for months, many don't get hints if I ghost them or say Im not interested.

    Secondly, its longggg been looked down upon for women to be promiscuous and actually "want" sex (unless they were prostitutes) but men being horn dogs, well thats just "male nature" apparently. And now its sort of ingrained in society that men are always horny and that they are always the one that pursues because they are desperate and that the woman is the gate keeper. But if she did the same as men then oh no she'd be considered easy and a whore, because it is not "in the female nature" apparently to want sex.

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    • Most girls have this option... hardly any guys, only the really wealthy.

    • I don't think it has to do with wealth, physical attraction over weights money much much more tbh. Not many girls at least my age think about how much money a guy has, its not even a part of our conversation. They mostly care about how physically attractive they are, especially for hook ups or casual relationships.

    • Well, you're one of the good girls who don't take advantage of the situation that double standards have created for you. I think an awful lot DO think about money, at least in the USA>

Most Helpful Guy

  • I've always had the understanding its much easier for a girl to get laid than a guy , some will argue that but it does seem to be true from past experiences

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    • Only because a lot of girls won't ADMIT they have such a list of 'go-to' guys, and won't talk about it.

      Remember, I don't allow anonymous answers! So mostly the answers are from girls who don't take advantage of this.

      But they darn well know it's true that they COULD take advantage of this.. and guys rarely have that option.

What Girls Said 17

  • You really have to ask? Because women have been shamed for decades if they're not chaste and pure or monogamous, so most of them are ashamed to be "giving away sex for free". Now you have to trade something for it like stuff, or a commitment. But what too many of them fail to realize is that trading anything for sex is the very definition of prostitution. I'm an adult, and I want sex, I'm not going to be shy about it, or expect "payment". We're both getting something out of it: a good time!

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  • Guys need to stop being desperate. I don't know why guys cry about this being "unfair" but then keep on going after anything remotely feminine.
    Like, stop being so easy and down for sex, and then it'll even the playing field.

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    • Some truth to this; but guys are socialized to go after girls all the time; otherwise, they are considered wimpy or unmanly, especially here in the USA.

    • I wouldn't say it's as much as men think. But there's probably more guys that would agree than if a guy asked.

      However, I have no interest in these men or their services, it's why I try to cut ties with them.
      I agree with @Cocochanel it's like having a box full of drugs. Sure it seems great to drug addicts aka thirsty men, however I don't do drugs so it doesn't help me at all. More of a burden than anything because I want to get rid of those "drugs" aka trying to cut ties with those men. (But then they call you mean and it's like dude, how are you going to ask to hang out AFTER you made a friends with benefits proposition that I refused? That's so awkward).

  • This is very true. And this is coming from someone who hasn't been on a date in months. Guys are always asking to take me out, but I am just not in the mood to date. I will go out by myself or take my child. But other than that, thats about it. a lot of guys have to put more effort into meeting females.

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    • Thanks, Nyomi! So many girls won't admit this is true.. I know a lot of girls don't take advantage of this state of affairs, like you.

      But they DARN WELL know it's generally true, but they won't tattle on their girl friends!

  • Because men are thirsty for sex

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    • Thirsty? Lol

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    • I don't have stds at all!

    • I don't care, I've had $2k extra and I didn't know what to spend on it. So I spend on hookers!

  • Because there's so many men out there who are desperate for sex.

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  • There are two guys who've shown interest in me but I'm not interested at all. One, if you saw my recent question, rejected me back in highschool and I don't want anything to do with him. The other posts ignorant shit all over social media and I can only imagine how he is in real life.

    Men with kids also come after me but I don't even have my own nor do I want any right now so no.

    Just because they're there doesn't mean they're good.

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  • I think that only goes for girls who are huge flirts. if I started asking all the guys I know for sex they would think something was wrong with me lol

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    • Chuckle, I'm not talking about sending a group e mail to all of them!!
      But if you asked them ONE AT A TIME? I doubt many would think there was anything wrong!

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    • that you know of!! A lot of girls aren't going to tell anyone, they won't brag about it like guys would.. though few guys CAN brag about this...

    • Being a flirt and hooking up are two different things

  • never really had guys hanging around like that haha, you run into people in clubs with that attitude, but not anyone I can call or anything

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    • Good for you, but I think you are in the minority. Certainly in the USA you would be; I hope it's not that extreme in the UK!

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    • Kids are awful about your appearance. Hopefully being grown up has ended that.

    • still get it sometimes but I'm good with it haha I'm happy with how I look

  • I'm a girl and I don't have that

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  • Girl here and I also don't do that... that being said I have quite a few female friends who at the most had one or two people they could call for sex if they wanted but never a whole pool. 😂

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    • Well, by pool I meant maybe 3-4, so your female friends are in that group still... very few guys have that. Even 1 or 2! Most guys have only their current sig. other.

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    • I agree.. I was asking WHY this is!

    • Have no idea... cause WOMEN 😂😂😂😂 don't try to understand it. Lol

  • I think this may be because guys grow impatient with woman if the 'relationship' stops progressing and they move on. Chicks tend to hold to those 'leads'for a rainy day :)

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  • Well I must be ugly cause I don't have anyone I can call in that regard.

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    • jAs if you weren't gorgeous. Shame on you for fishing for compliments.
      Of course, the good girls don't TAKE ADVANTAGE of this. But still, you know you have this option... and guys rarely do.

      So I'm asking why that is.. not whether it applies to you, personally.

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    • Belive me, you have a long time before you have to worry about that. A lot of people these days are single until 30 and longer. But guys should appreciate you more than they do.

    • I feel like I keep seeing everyone saying you're past it once you're 30 as a woman.

  • I agree , even When it simply comes to relationships and dates.

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  • it's not like any of that matters.
    it's like having a box full of drugs.

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    • Yes, but girls have that box full of drugs, for free, or at least most... and very few guys do, if they aren't willing to pay up front..

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    • yes, but there are also girls who care very much about their image and how they represent japan when they talk to foreigners. i would said most girls fall into this category. but to reitterate the cute guys have a lot of girls lined up. i've glanced at the keitai of several and i saw lots of girls.

    • You'd know more than I do. But the fact that guys have a lot of girls on their social apps sure doesn't mean they could call up any of them for spur-of-the-moment sex... but a lot of girls CAN do that. I suspect the main difference in Japan is that, as you say most girls are pretty careful about how they present themselves, so they don't take such advantage of this discrepancy

      Most US girls sure aren't inhibited about taking such advantage, that much is certain!

  • Haha... I don't even have a bucket full of guys

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  • I guess I am not an attractive girl then

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  • True. I have always had at least a handful of guys I can call and get a date anytime. It works for me and I love being in control.

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What Guys Said 9

  • i would use the word Roster LOL

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  • Why is it generally true? SIMPS... that's why. Too many guys are desperate, have no real standards and will do anything for sex or female attention.

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  • evolutionary biology. The male wants to spread sead as much as possible. Women have to be picky since they have always had more to lose than men.

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    • I doubt that women think a lot about evolutionary biology. Men neither.

  • Girls have it alittle easy with more options then guys do. Guy's have to really work hard and step up their game to have a lot of numbers.

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  • It's really just how the market works
    Men are buying, women are selling. There is a high high demand of buyers which puts the sellers at an advantage (women)

    But that's mostly only until her child bearing years, unfortunately at or after those years she significantly loses a lot of value... but men don't

    --> so women may have an advantage for the first 35 years or so but men are in it for the long haul and keep that power until they become old men

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  • 1. The number of guys interested in casual sex is greater than the number of girls interested in casual sex.

    2. The girls who are interested in casual sex primarily want it with guys who are more attractive than they are. Meanwhile, the guys who are interested in casual sex are much more willing to downgrade.

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  • Cause almost every guy would have casual sex, but fewer girls would.

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    • I dunno if that's really true! Whatdya mean by 'would?'

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    • @Anime27 Well, as I said, I'm not so sure about that. But I'm not asking that. I'm asking why girls have an easy option for sex.. or even just for a night out, without sex--while most guys who don't have a regular sign. other have no such option!

    • If 75% of guys would want nsa sex and 25% of girls would want nsa sex, then the girls would have more options to choose from

      Women put more "chips on the table" when engaging in casual sex and men have a biological weakness towards women's sexuality, and society applauds men who get laid often and shames women who open their legs too easily, so the willingness to have nsa sex is very different.

      so this results in women not having to work as hard to get laid as men

  • What some women have said here is true - this is entirely on guys. We're too thirsty in comparison.

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