like if you have started dating and want to be in a relationship with the person you are dating, but he/she won't share his/her history...
would you be ok with it? or its important for you to know?
Most Helpful Girl
It's important for me to know. Not necessarily right away, and not necessarily all at once. But I think sharing your history with someone usually happens organically, as you get to know each other more. Over time, as you become closer, you should be able to share everything with each other. I'd never want to be in a relationship where a part of the other person, or a part of me, has to stay locked away or behind a wall in order for the relationship to go well. True intimacy means knowing, and being known, for all that you are. Successes, failures, dreams, scars, warts and all.1THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE
Most Helpful Guy
So here's the thing. I don't know about you, but when I buy a car, even if that shit looks all shiny on the outside, I'm gonna check under the hood to see if there's any damage. I wanna KNOW what I'm getting myself into, both the good and the bad, not just the shiny shit that you put forth to me, cause I sure as hell know that when I buy that car, I'm gonna be with that shit for a while. And that's just my CAR.
With that said, when I decide to be with someone, you're going to know ME, not just this mask and shiny fake ass exterior that most people like to put forth. It's become very apparent to me, especially from this website, that we like to live in a society full of lies and omission of information, and personally, I think that's pathetic.
I think most people here cannot handle their past, they run from it, hide it from people, on top of the fact that most people here like to stay blissfully ignorant of their SO's past because they're too mentally weak to handle the information. Which is fine, that's your choice, but I've been alive long enough to know that when you omit information, when you fall in love with an IDEA of a person and not who they REALLY are and what comprises them, you're gonna get a load of surprises when you get further down the road, so it's best you know what you're getting into.
So for the TL;DR version:
I would explain my previous relationship history, and if they're not comfortable with sharing theirs ever, that's perfectly fine, we can definitely be friends, but consider any romantic spark between us lost.2THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE