Okay so I work with this dude, and he's pretty cute. But he never talked to anyone, so I started talking to him, just to be friendly, I try to at least learn everyone's names. But then he started wanting to hang out. SO today he texted me and asked if I was busy and if I wanted to chill. I said sure, by now I've developed a little crush on him. And I still really think he likes me too. Like he wears headphones while he's working, when I go to talk to him he takes out both his ear buds. He ACTIVELY tries to hang out with me. Today we sat in a gas station and passed back and forth a joint, also I ran errands with him. He even paid for us to get some take out, and then he drove us to on top of a car garage so we could look out at the lights of the city, and there were pink car lights at our feet, it just seemed so romantic, and we had like a deep convo.
Then he began taking me home. Almost right before we pulled up at my house he dropped the bomb that he has a girlfriend. but basically said the only reason he was still with her was because without her he'd be homeless. He's 18 working a retail job. So I get it. But at the same time it's still his girlfriend, and he still wants to hang out with me. I'm just like really confused. I've never even dated a guy before.
- Just see where things go14%(1)46%(6)Vote83%(5)
- give up entirely on him57%(4)31%(4)Vote0%(0)
- other opinion29%(2)23%(3)Vote17%(1)
Most Helpful Guy
OK it's in your best interest to remember this: if he doesn't have to leave her to get you, he WILL NOT leave her to keep you.
he told you he's dating. on one hand he's trying to see how much self-worth you have (I will tell you in a bit what a girl with self-worth will do). on the other hand he is laying down the excuse for why, (if you turn out to have low or no self-worth) he can cheat on you and it be ok.
here's what you need to do that will show you have high self-worth and he should respect you: tell him plainly that he has to end things with her or you will end things with him. you will not allow him to make you a side chick OR disrespect you by having a side chick while he's 'with' you.
and don't let yourself be guilt-tripped into taking care of him. you are not his mama. right now he needs a mother not a girlfriend.
anyway you'll notice 75% of girls said leave him or gave a nuanced answer. while 75% of guys said stay with him. that 75% of guys simply wish they were in a situation where they could so easily cheat and get an attractive, low self-worth girl on the side. don't be fooled by those comments.
and if this guy can't leave her for "xyz" you need to end it. this will go nowhere good for you.1
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