Why don't guys like romance books or movies or anything?

Updates:
And if they don't what's the reason. And why won't they watch one with a girl they like?
Also I'm talking about teen boys like 13-15

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Because romance books and movies have one common problem.
    It is very difficult to make a realistic romantic movie and keep it interesting, simply because romantic stories are boring. Yes, they are boring, except for those who live this romance. So what the writers and producers give us is always an unrealistic story, full of exaggerations where the whole universe plots to force our two love birds to break up.
    Take for example The Notebook, a girls favourite. It's a movie that gives us literally one cliche after the other.
    You have Noah and Allie.
    First obstacle in their relationship: Noah is poor, Allie is rich with many riches.
    Second obstacle: Allies parents don't like proletarians, so they want them to break up.
    Third obstacle: Allie must leave the city for her studies.
    Fourth obstacle: Noah goes to war.
    Fifth obstacle: Allie works as a Red Cross nurse and meets someone else.
    And with allthe above we have a Noah that black mails Allie to go out with him by... committing suicide in the fun park? A poor Noah who works as a builder but writes oetry and this with the best handwriting in the world. "Let's dance on the street" bullshit. A sex scene where Allie begins to murmur after the 2nd thrust and turns Noah off (in a romantic movie!). "Say Im a bird!" - "You're a bird"( apparently in this movie you always have to order your partner to do things Β΄to show your love), Allie marries someone else and then cheats on a really nice guy (what a good example for young girls) and then Noah as a true psycho builds a house exactly like Allie imagined it even though he hasn't seen her in months, maybe years I dont know. The guy belongs to a sanitarium!

    Then you say how beautifully romantic it is and have the nerve to say how women are more mature than men. Give me a break.
    To answer your update question, I will watch a romantic movie with my girl only when it is one worth the time and it's not really difficult to distinguish a girl's romantic movie from one that aims at all audiences. The only thing to missing in a girl's movie is the chocolate and tampn inside the case of the dvd to assure you what you're about to watch.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm a girl and I rarely like anything thats central focus is strictly romance. Tends to read as too unrealistic and cheesy.

    Old school Star Trek had the right idea about romance; intertwine it with a more dimensional story - keeps you guessing.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 130

  • If you're talking about younger boys or teens then it may be because they grow up with a culture that defines masculinity in a stricter way. Most men (not all) have a harder time expressing feelings. When you ask "how does it make you feel" it is possible for most men not to know at first. I see myself as very emotional, but I do realize it is hard to express my feelings. Other men are better at it than others. Nowadays people are progressing and this definition of masculinity isn't as strong, but it is still there. Because of the culture younger boys are not as interested in love or romance as much as girls. The girls culture is to aspire to love. And only care about love and marriage; this is still shown by the women being the more dominant audience to romance themes. But of course everyone is different and times are changing. This also doesn't mean if someone dislikes romance then they'll never like it or they won't ever find something they like.

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  • At that age, they're a lot more self conscious about what others will think of them and how it will impact their "man hood." They're still closed off from the rest of the world and believe anything will impact them in terms of being made fun of or losing respect from other guys their age. They've got the whole macho syndrome going on.

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  • You are 14. That's like a baby asking why does everybody wear diapers.
    You just have to gain more experience in life and expand. This isn't saying you are small or have no experience, it's just saying certain things take time to realize and everything isn't what the seem.

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  • I don't get the appeal, usually the story is the same but the actual story also takes a backseat to the male actor being handsome. I've actually had girlfriends try to sell me romance movies on the basis of how good looking the male actor is without even knowing the story.

    The movies are bit unrealistic and sensationalist. I really want to understand what it is about it that girls like

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  • Because romance is for women, literally. The guy showers her with the things she wants, they have drama because women love drama, men not so much (in fact one study showed women where happy when there partner was upset (during the "shit test" as they are called) because it showed that he was upset and therefore invested in her, a way of her knowing he was still invested in her and thus still had feelings for her). Romance simulates these things from the drama to the man functioning as provider etc. Its essentially porn for women its job is to appeal to women (that's why romance novels (the most read genre in the world) are written by women and read by women).

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  • lol I see so many people saying society is the reason majority guys don't watch romance. If I were trapped in a deserted island without society watching me and just nature by my side, I know all of my bros who still wouldn't watch romantic movies given the chance, they'd rather play a video game or do some sports. You know why?

    Because society isn't the reason we dislike romantic movies, it is because men and women are different both physically and emotionally. It is a primal thing that deals with how our bodies are wired and is as a result of nature not society.

    For me, Romance is annoying and uninteresring to watch. They are designed for women, kinda like porn for women.

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  • My opinion as to why stories centered only around romance suck is that romance should be an addition to an already existing plot, not it's sole purpose. If the story is only about romance then it becomes highly predictable whereas if the romance is and can be influenced by the primary elements of the story it is in my opinion way more interesting.
    Romance drama characters in my opinion tend to be dull and overly dramatic - they cause conflict just to give the story juice, and a reason to argue, not because they have a reason for it.

    I will actually go so far as to say that action stories that males prefer are outright better than romance stories that females prefer. Notice how most of the best literary works are more in align with male action-oriented interests.

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    • okay how about a gay romance where the two guys fight each other in public

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    • It's supposed to be romantic but since they do a lot of fighting it doesn't feel romantic sometimes, people who read it said they liked it though

    • @Dog19 This just proves my original point - their "fight" is because of romance, not because of something else. This is pure romance - but with more drama. That's about it.

  • I don't know, why are romance/erotic novels so interesting to some women?

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    • Romance/erotic novels simply don't do much for me. I'm very visually-oriented so I generally want to see a naked lady rather than reading about a woman undressing. The latter doesn't do much for me.

      Romance films I find okay sometimes. Most of the times they seem a little too much like absurd fantasy to me though. I consider films like The Wedding Planner to be more in the absurd fantasy realm than even Harry Potter.

    • An example of a romantic film I liked is Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. That introduced a fantasy element to the plot but I thought the way the people in the film behaved was convincing enough.

  • Why do girls not like action movies and such as much as guys?

    It's because guys and girls are fundamentally different. The earlier you accept it, the easier your life will be in the future.

    Thus the remaining question is why exactly do guys not like romance movies and books as much as girls. Mainly for different cues they pay attention to, but also because they express and perceive empathy and compassion differently. Girls empathy and compassion is mostly based on trying to feel what the other person (or in this case the person in the book/movie) feels. Guys do not empathise that way. Guys try to understand there is an issue and to fix it.

    You can do 1+1 here why guys do not like romance as much as a result of that. They can't fix a movie character.

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    • Then what about romance in real life?

    • @candyaurora

      No one is saying that men do NOT like romance at all - but the specific kind of romance that is displayed in romance novels and movies. But that displayed romance isn't the blueprint for all kinds of romance there is.

    • Yeah I agree 😊

  • I was 15 when I read Pride and Prejudice and I loved it. I've always liked romantic books and movies.

    They won't because they are still worried about what the other boys would say if they found out.

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  • We're too focused doing romantic stuff in real life, we need a break from it from time to time.

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  • My favorite movie is the original black and white Casablanca lol, argument invalid.

    https://youtu.be/rEWaqUVac3M

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    • Exactly! Guys like romance that involves sacrifice, even if it means you don't get Ingrid Bergman.
      Oh, and if some Nazi officer takes a bullet to cap it all off, that's all the better.

    • @I-am-a-nobody Mhmm exactly.

      Plus the classic romances let us be in love and yet still be masculine and actual men instead being these weird sappy love obsessed guys modern romance have made us out to be.

      You just don't see a Bogart character sacrificing himself for the woman he loves anymore these days.

  • Because they're boring. A romance movie to a guy is porn. I'm half joking. Guy sees girl. They're both horny. Guy does her up the ass on some random couch. To a guy or at least me anyway that just says romance.

    Boys 13-15 care about girls, cars, sports, and maybe working their 1st job.

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  • To be honest, a lot of romance is just poorly written. I like things that are reasonable, realistic but empowering and exciting.

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  • Because most romantic movies/books are written by women for women where the main character is a female.
    Which usually means the male characters are poorly written arbitrary extensions of the female character's happiness and not actual human beings whose feelings are cared about by anyone.

    I won't mind watching a romantic movie that is NOT female-centric though, such as Notting Hill.
    But I don't care to watch some woman's fantasy because that isn't my interpretation of romance.

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  • Most romance is written exclusively to appeal to women. The hottest guy ever falls in love with her and he's obsessed with her and she makes him prove himself and he does and they live happily ever after.

    Romance written for a guy would reflect OUR experience with romance: After sixty thousand attempts, you finally trick a modestly hot girl into going out with you but after a while, she figures out you're not as tall and rich and handsome as she thought, so she cheats on you but it's your fault because she didn't feel loved at the time and blah blah blah...

    That's why romance isn't written to appeal to men. We get enough of that bullshit in real life, we don't want to read about it.

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  • Because the male brain is not wired that way.
    We find chick flicks, or books, to be boring at best. Usually, they are intellectually insulting and cringeworthy to the point that we squirm in our seats.

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  • Their age. They don't know the value, what women see in these. More mature guys know that these are special things for women, and like these, because they love the women that like them.

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  • What it is we are afraid to be labeled as not being Straight
    I love to be Romantic, Affectionate type of guy with a girl

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  • We do love them, but only when they include cyborgs, time travel, machine guns and fast cars!

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  • Did you go to the library to test your hypothesis? During that age I was already reading Harry Potter, Hardy Boys Series, Nancy Drew, Neil Gaiman's and some science books. I also like fantasy series and cartoons. No romance though. Some sort of bias thing I guess. It's a girl's book.

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  • Perhaps I read into this too far, but I feel as though romance is a much more pivotal and important part of life to women than it is to men. Not that men don't value it, but it doesn't dominate our lives. Guys typically have more ambitions not related to romance, and so our literature reflects that. We want epic tales and great accomplishments, and if there is a little romance on the side, then that's all the more realistic to us, whereas a full blown romance novel that talks very little about all else is not what we want, nor is it realistic.

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  • Summer Lovers is one of my favorite movies.

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  • Guys love romance! My 15 y/o son is very romantic. It's just that a guy's view of romance is radically different from a girl''s. Men are more practical when it comes to romance and romance to a man usually involves sacrifice or a willingness to sacrifice.

    To me,...
    Romance is Rocky yelling, "Adrian!" a couple dozen times after the biggest fight of his life in "Rocky". Or Joe Starrett being willing to fight a hopeless gunfight for his wife and boy in the movie "Shane" (an even older movie).

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  • Thats where u wrong kiddo. My anime list is for the most part only romance. If I read a book it must be romance or else I won't read it.

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  • I'm 15 and I personally like romance books, but am scared of being caught reading them. I think also a lot of guys don't really understand the romance behind the novels.

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  • Some do! But you're right, men don't as much as women do. I think it's for many reasons. 1. Women are taught to be more in touch with their emotions. 2. Women are naturally more of romance lovers. 3. Society teaches men to be the ones who chase women and therefore women are more often the recievers of romantic gestures so they can relate to them better.

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  • I like romantic sci fi stuff. I'm writing one right now.

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  • We just prefer more action. I don't oppose to romance movies though, if a girl wants to watch it with me, of course I'll accept it.

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  • It's boring and very fake.

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What Girls Said 40

  • There is so much romance in... non-romance books and movies. Lol. Trust me, guys like romance as much as we do- but sometimes it's a different flavor of romance. I honestly think I have met way more romantic, poetic men than women.

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  • For the same reason girls don't like horror, gore, flailing, amputations, etc at 13-15.

    Boys are boys. Girls are girls.

    If you really wanna get theoretical plenty will tell you its primal. The man hunts, the woman cooks.

    Frankly I thing it's just age. Few men enjoy romance films but with age comes great patience for sex. Whether that's sitting through titanic and getting to spoon at the car scene or whether it's a horror film and being the protector and hugging their girl for safety.

    You are young. So are the boys. Just accept people are different.

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    • I disagree with you about only one aspect of what you wrote.
      Women, specifically teenage and early 20s women, are the largest audience for horror movies.
      Horror movies are tailored specifically for that audience.
      That is why the movies usually begin with a couple of hot cheerleaders being sliced and diced.
      The female audience, who are about that age, identify/empathise with the girls who are being killed in horrible ways on the screen, which gives the young female audience their first adrenalin fix during the movie.

  • Lmao... they prefer reality. πŸ˜‚

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  • Its an emotional thing, a lot of men do not like feeling emotional. Men are more into action, mystery and suspense movies versus that emotional love movies. This is why you will never meet a guy that likes Lifetime channel, thats a woman channel.

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  • To me, it's boring. The only one I will tolerate is the notebook other than I don't watch romance movies.
    As for guys and I'm not going to speak for every guy, just going from what I have realized from my boyfriend. It doesn't do nothing for him, he's romantic but just doesn't care for romance film.

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  • Well depending on the movies, books etc it can be waste of time.

    Unless the contents teach you something or helps you in someway.

    But I am not saying you should never read or watch movies.

    I love to read and do read daily.

    Any who, but for some or many those things are just not their type of entertainment

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  • Some do but romance novels are stereotyped a lot. Romantic movies can be pretty boring or melodramatic even for some women.

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  • because their stupid, and have no emotions. lol jk. But really, a lot of the time society doesn't allow them to be emotionally alright with romance.

    Sometimes you get lucky and you have a guy that actually likes some of these movies, but most of the time they are older.

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  • they do... when it involves batman and superman or a threeway with catwoman, Harley and Ivy

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  • because those are full of unrealistic bullshit.
    also, maybe because there's a stereotype that says that only girls can like those kind of things, and guys want to appear manly, so they pretend they dont like those? I don't know just a theory

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  • It's probably because there generally aren't enough explosions, gun fights and sword battles.

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  • Hell i don't even like that shit

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  • I'm sure they might like some, but it's not a manly thing to like romance so they hide it.

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  • I didn't like it when I was younger and I still don't like it now. it's so unrealistic, predictable and boring. But I've met guys that really enjoyed it.
    I think it's all about social pressure. I mean can be the main actor in a romance film and maybe a writer, but simply enjoy read it and watch is a girl think and... be compared to a girl is not that nice because society.

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  • Some guys actually do like that stuff, not a lot but some. You'd be surprised! Not everyone is the same lol.

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  • im a gurl but i dont like them too. if not full of unecessary drama, theyre very depressing especially those that dont have happy ending.

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  • If they don't I can't blame them because it's my least favorite type of movie to watch, but some guys might like it they can't all be the same.

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  • testosterone

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  • They do.

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  • I don't even like them myself, they're stupid and unrealistic.

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  • Cause for some guys they may not have a girlfriend or wife to share It with. Or maybe something in their past might have went wrong

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  • I think a majority of guys do, but society pressures them to be manly and hate them

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  • just not their thing

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  • I guess that it's too complex for them

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  • Different reasons I'm a woman and I think they're stupid

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  • Unrealistic ideals/standards

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  • I find them boring and cringeworthy. I do like romance as a subplot though.

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  • There's guys that do.

    Most guys don't because that's what they're taught.

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  • Because it's written for girls

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  • I dont like... i like more drama and comedy, and sci-fi

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