Is it possible to keep your weight from affecting your love life?

Long story short: I had an accident that put me in a wheelchair temporarily and made it impossible to exercise for a period. I'm currently 5'7'' and 160. Pre accident I was 120 and had a great figure. I'm working on it but it's a lot easier to gain weight than lose it! I've dated a little and I feel like men aren't interested because I don't have a great body anymore. Everyone says I'm normal size but I think they are just being nice. Is it best to stay out of the dating game until I get my weight down and self esteem up because its crushing everytime?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • 5'7'' and 160 is a bit overweight for a woman according to beauty "standards" (I assume it is not muscle since you recover) but by all means it is not a deal breaker imho so there might be less men attracted to you but these are really superficial imho and you are better off without them.

    "Everything is possible for the one who believe" so I wish you good recovery and if dating kill you just stop doing it for a while, that will not kill you.

    Tried that shit 2 times for my part and it did not go well, never done it again and never will, I did survive ^^

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Most Helpful Girl

  • you don't have to think that way, a man should love you not your body. and you are not obese comon. ❤💚

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    • Thank you for that. I agree but these nagging thoughts keep sabotaging me!

    • Nah you should not think about that at all, love yourself, and be happy that you are actually healthy and this is what matters most.

What Guys Said 8

  • I wouldn't say it's best. To an extent, weight shouldn't be a steadfast condition for dating, and if it is, fight that attitude, don't pander to it! Of course, losing weight should be a constant mid/ longer-term goal, but hopefully those who have good reasons for gaining weight (i. e. those who Don't drink fizzy drinks, and talk about food all the time, then wonder why they're fat) can be confident that they can still be appreciated, and hopefully they also look for more depth in men, than to aim for shallow guys who may reject them. It will give you life experience. Just remember, if you've got a good excuse for having gained weight, Tell them why, because they Will wonder why you're overweight, and will be motivated to support you in losing that weight. Ultimately, the weight that is datable is one figure: the figure that he answers 'I guess so' to, when asking himself 'Can I be seen with her in public?' When it comes to dating, that's the only target that matters.

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  • it's not about your weight for the most part. It's more about your self esteem. I'd stay out until I felt confident enough to try again

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    • I agree. I'm a seemingly confident person but the truth is, I think people must not like me as much because I'm fat.

    • seemingly yea but there's also the subconcious factor both ways

    • I completely agree

  • Yes. Just take a year off and work on yourself. Why be less than what you are

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  • Well to me it doesn't matter about how much weigh it's about your personality and how you take care of yourself and I am being very honest

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  • yeah 160 is rather gross (at least you are not 200). Best to stay off the meat market until you are back to 120. Whatever diet you go on make it a permanent one unless you just want to gain it back again.

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    • I'm not on a diet other than take in less calories and exercise more.

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    • Eh everyone is if they live long enough.

    • Perhaps

  • Think about it. How will other like you if you dont like yourself? And 160 its not that much its ok

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    • I'm a very out going person, for example one guy said he admires my confidence, but I can't help but think that's part of the problem

    • its not a problem you are average not overweight.

  • weight management is 90% diet, so just eat healthy and don't over eat. If you want to lose weight reduce consumption.

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    • I'm well aware of how weight loss works but it doesn't happen overnight.

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    • Thanks for the answer, certainly didn't mean to come off snappy.

    • it's all good

  • Yes its quite important !! u should stay in shape especially if ur parter is in shape !!

    I know one should love irrespective of everything else, but everything else does have its side effects. He loved u when u were 120, don't expect him to have same feelings when u will be 200. its very important to stay in shape!!

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    • Well considering he didn't know me at 120 and doesn't know I was ever that size I don't think that's the problem. what makes you think I will be 200?

    • I am not saying that u r 200, i just used to give u an example. i only imply that if u put on certain weight then yes he would feel it. it doesn't mean he will stop loving u, it only means that he wants u to look better / stay fitter !!

      I look after my weight but if my partner doesn't maintain herself then yes i will feel about it, not that i will stop loving her !!

    • I'm talking dating in general not necessarily a specific person.

What Girls Said 0

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