My fwbs is upset because I want to stop. Is this fair?

We met on Tinder a month ago. I was expecting one of us to get bored and stop hanging out. We actually had more fun together than I thought. I realized I was falling for him; he's nice, thoughtful, matched my sense of humor, attractive, has goals, is doing good for us being this young and being on his own. We had great conversations and a good laugh every day. I considered stopping but I loved being around him. Then he told me he liked me and a few days after we had sex. I was sexually attracted to him in the beginning but when he told me he liked me I wanted to be with him and I assumed he wanted to be with me. Few days later he tells me he doesn't want a relationship. I was sad but I wasn't upset. We hadn't talk about what we wanted and I stupidly got swept up in him, not realizing he met he liked me enough for sex. He isn't looking for a relationship but just someone to chill with. It took me a week to decide that I didn't want to keep doing this with him knowing I had feelings that wouldn't be reciprocated.

I've been distancing myself from him. I don't invite him places or accept his invitations. I don't talk to him much. Our sex got boring. Before when I thought he liked me I was giving it my all and having a great time. Now I didn't enjoy it at all and did it just to do it. He caught on to what was going on and is upset. He said I'm making things complicated and doesn't want us to stop because we were having a great time.

I agree but I'm not going let myself fall deeper into a hole. Is he being fair?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Congrats you've realized two things. friends with benefits rarely work and tinder is not for relationships!
    Life ain't fair. Just tell him the truth you want a relationship and he's not into that.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Up to you, dude. You get a choice too.

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What Guys Said 6

  • Congratulations! You are today's example of why Friends With Benefits is an illusion.

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  • You're allowed to say you want more, and he is allowed to say he preferred it as it was.

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  • What a disgusting way to behave. Shame on you.

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  • look you need to trust your instincts if you want to break it off do it don't let him make your decision for you. Got to move on with your with your life he is a big boy he needs to suck it up and move on.

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  • Both of you were fooling yourselves. friends with benefits = trying to have my cake and eat it. No matter how much you try to control the definition of what you are, you can't.

    You were probably not being honest with yourself either.

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  • You're both allowed to want what you want. That happens to not be the same thing.

    Suggest you move on.

    Clearly you'd be happier with a guy who loved you and your body.

    That guy is out there. Go find him.

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What Girls Said 0

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