Does this shy guy like me? Did I scare him off? How should I proceed?

6 wks ago I got a message on FB from a guy that lives in my town, "Hey girl how's it going". We are both single parents. (He's 34 & I'm 25). He said he's been wanting to message me for a while & asked if I wanted to hang out. I got scared & said I had my daughter that wknd, maybe the following. He said cool & our communication slowed drastically for about 3 wks, didn't ever mention hanging out.

2 wknds ago I ran into him at the bar, I approached him. We talked a lot, he bought my drinks. At bar close he offered to give me a ride. He asked if he could use my BR, then he joined me on the couch. We talked, he held my hand & initiated kissing & was sweetly affectionate. Things got heavier, I told him that I don't have sex right away & he said he doesn't either. We cuddled, fell asleep. He text me casually after that (offered me a ride to my car the next day) & message me a couple days later saying he wanted to hang out again.

Saturday he picked me up & took me to dinner. We talked casually, held doors for me. He opened up a lot about his families issues in the past & current & his near death accident. We got back to my place & he came in & we chatted on the couch for an hr. He left bc I had to get my daughter. We hugged & said we should watch the Super Bowl together. I asked for a kiss & he gave me 3 kisses. Communication has been slower since (we've never texted TOO much because we are both busy people). Yesterday we chatted quite a bit, I saw him briefly bc I snapped him a pic of Tbell, it led to me picking him up some to bring to him at work (no one was around, after hours he works on his own projects). He seemed quiet & shy, showed me around. That night he message me & thanked me for dinner. I asked him if he was shy & he said, "Little bit at first lol is that bad?" I said, "No lol I just like you & I can't tell how you're feeling so I thought maybe you're shy" he didn't reply. I asked him if it was ok, he didn't message me until morning & said "sorry I passed out on u"


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Most Helpful Guy

  • a much better reply would have been "no lol actually it's cute :) "

    the last part of your text could have stung his pride a little. but honestly you are both adults so while you unintentionally put put your foot in your mouth, if he can't get over that statement he really needs to grow up.

    I'd say continue like nothing is wrong (nothing should be wrong). and just say some things going forward that let him know you think of him as manly.

    should clear any misunderstanding right up. and again, he really should have skin thick enough to handle that though. so shouldn't be a problem.

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    • Thanks! I did message him today and he messaged me back a couple times, but wasn't as playful or upbeat. Should step back a little and let him come to me/give him space? I don't want to come off as desperate.

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    • yeah respond amicably to those and you're set :)
      lol that's why this site is a good community to join ^^

      and after a day when you look at the question there will be stars under the main comments. you click the star to select the MHO. :)
      welcome to G@G btw!

    • Thank you! So on Wednesday after I did my daily message to him I decided I'm tired of initiating and he will if he's interested. It took until laat night 6pm, but he messaged me. It was a little message "wah I'm so tired of working". Like he was just looking for a reason to message me. And then we chatted back and fourth and he showed me the truck he's working on. So, now I'm sure he likes me. But that he's just shy.

What Guys Said 1

  • He is losing interest.

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    • Why?

    • He still responds within 10-20 minutes of me messaging him and asks me how I am every day. Usually when I lose interest I stop responding to guys.

What Girls Said 1

  • I think he actually likes you. I mean, he hasn't shown any indication that he is not into you.

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    • I'm getting that too! I decided yesterday to not initiate and see what happens, and he started messaging me last night. It was cute, a little message that said, "wah, I'm tired from work". Like he's just poking for me to talk to him. Lol.

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