Should I or not sleep with my 'sugar daddy'?

Now I'm meeting a potential sugar daddy on Saturday. He is super handsome, athletic, pretty young and has a really cute accent. We've been texting for 10 days every single day. He wants to be exclusive with me and seems to be really caring, tells me to bring warm clothes, that we will go shopping, and do whatever I like. He booked hotel and flights. He is classy and polite, not even a bit of a pervert. I love talking to him. We joke a lot. He says I'm his angel. And I'm thinking I'm going to fall in love with him. We haven't discussed allowance and there's no way I'll ask. I'm thinking just getting away with someone I'm actually attracted to and who cares about me will be really nice for a change. Money is not important this time. I see him almost as a boyfriend. I think I'll want this to last. Now I don't know will he want to sleep with me during this trip. I feel that we shouldn't have sex now. I'd just want to kiss and cuddle. I want it to start like a normal relationship. What do you think?

Updates:
It was fun. He is a totally cool dude. Soo we did have sex and it was some really nice lovemaking. And yes we did a lot of cuddling, too. We even had a pillow fight. :) No, I didn't ask for any money from him, but he took me to some really nice places and payed for everything. He invented some funny cute nicknames for me and we still talk every day. I don't know if it's going to turn into a real relationship though... I'd like it to but I'm also super scared of commitment.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • My advice is to sleep with him if you want but do not fall in love. Sugar relationship is a lot like forbidden relationship. There are boundaries you do not want to cross. The one ending up getting hurt will be you.

    There are many reasons sugar daddies get sugar babies. However, the root is similar: they do not want a normal relationship or do not have time for one. Asking for a normal relationship is asking for trouble. If you keep advancing then he might string you along and leave you once he got busy. If he is decent then he would sever the relationship before you get too deep.

    Treat the relationship like a dream. Enjoy the moment but do not forget that it is simply a dream.

    Even the sugar daddies are faking it. He might have a 60k/year job but wanted to enjoy being treated like a king and viewed as a handsome prince in the eyes of young women.

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What Guys Said 16

  • I know many of these relationships. If you consider it just like regular dating, but with a different set of rules, then you will be fine.

    The first thing is to make sure he is what he says he is. There are many fakers who are happy to talk a girl into bed, but have no intention of supporting her.

    When you meet him, decide quickly whether you will have sex with him or not. If yes, then do. If not, then end it immediately so you are both not wasting your time.

    "Normal" relationships often start with sex on the first or second date.

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  • Well, for what I understand, "sugar daddy" is someone who is willing to pay someone in exchange of affection and sometimes sex.

    I do thing this practice is a disgrace for both parties.

    Nevertheless, for what I understand you would be willing to not do that for the money but for real affection. Then I would advice to ask him to cancel the trip and just date him like you would normally do or at the very least, refuse to go to shopping and not let him to buy you anything. That will show that you are really not interested in his money.

    As for sleep with him, well, it is up to you but if you do it out of affection that's good, if you do it for money then well, feel free to lose your soul and pride.

    Hope you will find peace and stop this "practice" of "sugar daddy"

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    • Hey that's some cool advice :)
      We don't live in the same city or even country so we can't meet without travelling. And I want to show him it's not about the money but I also know it's his way of showing affection.

  • Well I don't necessarily agree with what you do. I think you have fallen for this dude. And he has maybe fallen for you. And he wants to be exclusive with you. I say you two need to date and talk instead of being a sugar daddy type relationship. I mean it sounds he's gonna spoil the heck out of you anyways so its not like he sont give you an "allowance" Its not strange to connect with anyone online so you met on a site for specifically this. You can still have a normal relationship but not your typical sugar daddy arrangement. Be a hell of a story if it works out lmao.

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    • If your taking his money Yeah you should sleep with him. If you can't deliver prostitution may not be your best source of income.

  • This is pretty common for women of your age nowadays (I'm 40 now), and I'm familiar with a lot of women who do that. What I can tell you is this... yes, you'll get some of the material things you desire. You'd better not put all of your eggs in that basket if you're not willing to physically conform though. There WILL come a point when he's given those things, and your negotiating card on whether or not you have a say in physical relations will get yanked-and you won't be told exactly when that is. Remember... there are a lot of sugar daddies out there-and a lot of sugar mommas. As easily as he found you, he can, and will, find another as soon as he doesn't get what he wants. Don't expect a card that say "I want sex by Mar. 10th or it's over." That's not forthcoming. The more he puts out financially, the less say you'll have on when that may occur. That's how it works.

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    • Or you could just be like most, and think you've got him by the balls (a common trait of girls your age), and find out. I have sisters who've done this.

  • Do whatever he says. He is your daddy

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  • sounds like too good to be true no one is that perfect

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    • Yeah, you may be right... Well we'll find out soon. Pray for me :D

    • Ok he isn't perfect but he is wow :o I think I fell in love :/

    • how did it turn out😂

  • Ask him you want a girl or a whole?

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  • If the relationship is all about him paying you, then I wouldn't call Him a sugar daddy, I'd call you something beginning with P.
    But if you don't want sex, don't do sex.

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    • Oh ok I don't mind you calling me a prostitute. Thanks for sharing your opinion.

    • Oh I don't mind. Thanks for not taking it as a personal insult.

    • I don't think it's an insult at all. I respect all people who make their own money without hurting others.

  • Why dont ye make it official

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  • A relationship based on materialistic needs can never last.

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  • Sleep with him

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  • Wow, you are a fucking golddigging whore lmao

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  • You love talking to him... he's polite... blah blah blah. You wouldn't be meeting him if not for the money so why bother bsing people here? This is why you are all a waste of time. You cannot be honest with yourself. You can't even be honest to a bunch of strangers while under an Anonymous name LOL.

    The cognitive dissonance is so strong with this one. I just thank God I can be honest with myself. Whether you sleep with him or not makes no difference, the whole thing is a farce.

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    • Dude, it's not like that. I've done things just for the money so I know it's different now.

  • you are an embarassment to your sex.

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  • I have zero respect for you. If your affection can be bought then ask yourself what you are able to give in exchange if not physical things? The whole sugar daddy idea is perverse to me.

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    • My affection can't be bought but many times in my life I needed the money more than respect.

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    • Well if I find something better I might just quit this. Right now I've got enough money to go through a couple of months. That's why I can take a break from it all now.

    • Hang in there! It's good you can take a break from things. Use this time to reevaluate where you are and where you're headed. Don't be afraid to reach out for help in your community either.

What Girls Said 7

  • A sugar baby is a prostitute with a cute name and potentially exclusivity. If he is paying (and by flights, a hotel and shopping it sounds like he is) then he is going to expect sex. If you don't want this I think it's really important you're up front about it and tell him before he arrives. You don't know this man, texting him for 10 days does not at all tell you what he's capable of if he doesn't get what he's purchasing.

    I'd highly recommend getting a job, as boyfriends don't pay as well as guys who pay for prostitutes

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    • "A sugar baby is a prostitute with a cute name and potentially exclusivity"
      All women are prostitutes at some level. Relationships of all kinds are primarily about sex and money.

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    • Want to bet? Let's see what happens when you get a divorce. It is all about how much money the woman gets for having had sex with the man.

    • @WalterRadio considering I've saved and paid for the majority of assets in my marriage over the years and we don't have alimony I'll be on the losing side of that argument so again - maybe women only want to sleep with you for money but that's not my character

  • i agree, just kiss and cuddle for now

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  • Go for it.

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  • if you see him as boyfriend , why do you call him sugar daddy? You can ask him if he wants a relationship.

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    • Well I met him on a sugar dating site so I guess he was looking for a sugar baby. I didn't even see him as a potential 'daddy' as he is young (31) but I started chatting with him cause I was bored and he turned out to be a great guy.

    • Huh. That's nice. As I said you should discuss this with him.

    • I think I will but a little later. I don't want him to know I like him so much.

  • If you don't he ll surely find another sugar baby

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  • He's a sugar daddy so I mean... his intentions with you probably isn't wanting a relationship like a boyfriend girlfriend relationship... you'll probably have to talk to him about that

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  • I'm sorry but you are pretty much selling yourself.. look I know you need money but that's not an excuse for you to take money from men, we all need money that's why we work in jobs we hate. One needs to fight for himself not to take advantages of others. Seriously this whole "sugar daddy" thing is disgusting. If you need money, WORK!

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    • "not an excuse for you to take money from men"
      I'm sorry. Have you never heard of a wife? Just what do you think marriage is about? It is about sex and money.

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    • You just can't accept the fact that I don't need a man?

    • Not if you want to have a lifestyle that your friends will have.

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