Guys, what goes through your mind when an ex comes back?

I dated him the past two months. He was talking about us becoming an item. The next day he went cold. He kept telling me it was not about me, that he wanted to solve some things first and we would have met once he was done with it. I gave him space, but realising he was taking time saying 'we see each other as soon as I solve my issues', I told him to tell me whether he wanted to reassure me or tell me he had a change of heart. He says he is sorry about how things are going and that he really appriciated me these two months. I ask him what happens and today turns out his ex of two years contacted him and told him what he has wanted to hear for years. He also said that he is not in a relationship with her but that he is really really confused and I did absolutely nothing that turned him off. He broke up with her around last June I think, but may also have been July or August. I am not sure. It was long before the break up that he was not satisfied with this relationship.
It could have happened to me, so I am not helding him responsible for the situation nor for my feelings hurting and I am putting myself in his shoes. I guess that if he is confused is because he has mixed feelings (at least that is how i would feel if I was confused): he really likes me (facts before she contacted him prove it) and was looking forward starting a relationship with me. His feelings for me might be why he did not jump right back into the relationship with her, says he is confused and tried to gain time saying 'I solve my issues first and then we see each other'. However, I am aware of the fact that two months were not enough for having so strong feelings for me to say no straight away to two years of his past. Now I will not contact him and I will go on with my life as if he said he does not want to see me anymore. I know that there is a great chance he gives the past a try because he said that she said what he has wanted to hear for years. Is it what is going through his confused head?


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What Guys Said 3

  • He wasn't looking forward to anything with you. This "solve problems" bullshit is a complete lie. He was putting you on hold in case his ex girlfriend didn't want to reconcile and you'd have been nothing but a backup plan till he found someone better. All his bullshit niceties he was telling you was nothing more than throwing you a bone so you'd stick around just like you did. What do you think of him now?

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    • English is not my mother tongue so I express myself again and if you reply is a confirmation I will take it as a fair advise. He broke up with his girlfriend this summer. We met and they had no contact. We dated two months and he proved he was being serious about me by his actions. The last time I saw him he talked about being an item. The next day he started acting weird. His ex contacted him shortly after I saw him and said we were going to be an item. Since then he tried to gain time saying he had issues to solve.

    • Forget him and move on

  • "Oh she's back"

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  • They can "come back"... I'll just kick them out... they are ancient history.. a closed book... seeya!

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