I constantly argue with my boyfriend, please help me stop?

I constantly argue with my boyfriend for a number of reasons:
- He keeps comparing me to other girls.
- Keeps belittling me while complimenting other girls.
- Is always concerned about someone seeing us together.
- Keeps talking about his exes and the woman he used to love.

I hate arguing with him. It's not that I want to but I just can't help it. I want to stop!
Am I justified arguing with them?
What should I do to stop?

Please help.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • If he consistently compares you to other girls, belittles you, and is constantly concerned with someone seeing you two together, you should stop arguing with him and leave him. You teach people how to treat you by virtue of what you expect (respect, for instance) versus what you get (belittled).
    You need to ask yourself why you are staying with someone when it is so easy for you to cite his negative attributes. Especially concerning to me, from a relationship coaching lens, is the comparison to other girls, his concerns with someone seeing you two together, and him talking about exes. That generally points to someone with cheating tendencies.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • This doesn't sound like a healthy relationship, he should uplift you as a person and not throw you down and make you feel small. You should have a talk with him and also sit down and think about your relationship together with him and decide if it's worth it. Make a pros and cons list. If it really is worth fighting, then the talk will help and he should listen to your concerns and change. If he doesn't change, he doesn't respect you as a girlfriend or a human being.

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What Guys Said 5

  • His behaviour is disrespectful towards you. Belittling you and comparing you to other girls is wrong in my opinion, I would encourage you to confront him about it first. If he doesn't listen to you, I'd encourage you to protect yourself from this emotionally abusive relationship by parting ways with him.

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  • Why do people stay in relationships like this. No wonder the divorce rate is so high. The better a relationship is, the easier it is. If you have to fight and struggle every time you turn around to make it work, then you are dating the wrong person!

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  • You should just end it. I was in a similar situation once. Right when I ended it, I cried and cried. But didn't take long at all until I got over it and knew I made the right choice

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  • breaking up can stop the argueing. You need a parter that willl support you and bring you up.

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  • Is he doing this as an insult or does it start out as an example to prove a point?
    From a guy who has done half of these things:
    - He keeps comparing me to other girls.
    It may be the only experience he is basing his thoughts from.
    - Keeps belittling me while complimenting other girls.
    It might be he is off-put/ embarrassed by something.
    - Is always concerned about someone seeing us together.
    See the above answer.
    - Keeps talking about his exes and the woman he used to love.
    See the first answer.

    Any reason doesn't excuse his actions. But you also have to get to the heart of the issue. Something is bothering him and is (obviously) causing him to act this way.

    If you sit down with him and talk (take great care to keep the tone and emotion of the conversation down) with him, you might get to the root of the problem. I hope my experience can help you.

    For example, I loved my last SO and worked hard to love her but I came to notice we had little in common. In the end, it was a very small and insignificant thing that pushed me over the edge to break it off. In hindsight, I had something really wonderful but as I was, he may be stuck on something. Talking about it may make him a little irritated but may also uncover it. Hope this helps!

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What Girls Said 11

  • If it's constant, I think it's best to break up with him. It doesn't sound like you're happy and the stuff he's doing is mentally abusive in a way. He doesn't sound like a great guy and I think you can do much better.

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  • why did you not kick him to the curb as soon as this started?

    he keeps doing it because you keep allowing it. so have some standards and stop being his doormat.

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  • You clearly don't like the situation your in the things he says and way he treats you.

    You don't have to argue with him to make that point clear to him.

    Talk like two adults and maybe the situation you don't like will stop

    Arguing isn't making any difference or changing things so try something new!

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  • Break up with him - block his number and if he continues to talk to you - file stalking charges against him

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  • Sounds like the only thing that you can do to stop this is to break up with him. He's not, by the sounds of it, a good partner for you.

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  • he's an insecure jerk trying to bring you down to his level

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  • Become more of a agreeable person, practice mindfulness and hind a solution to the problem and don't try to by always right

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  • intead try to talk to him whn you two are calm

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  • Yes you're very justified in arguing with him. He's being an inconsiderate asshole. Tell him it hurts you when he talks that way, if he continues then its better for you to move on.

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  • If I were you I would've left that relationship like yesterday

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  • Wow, please make this douche your EX!

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