Guys seems to back off when I take initative?

i have seen a pattern with guys online (dating apps); the second i take more initiative they seem to back off.

Do you think its pure coinicident or something else? I can talk to a guy for a week, and he will start basically all the conversation and/or ask me out, but the time i decide to make the first move, talk to him first it seems to make them to back off. When i say back off i mean they will start using a long time to respond, and suddenly i dont hear from them anymore.

Im just curious to why this happens

Updates:
My current situation: i want to suggest hangig out with this guy im currently talking to but from former experiences i dont want to

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What Guys Said 2

  • you are picking the wrong guys.

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  • most guys are not used to it so when you make a first move be sure not to go too far with it
    maybe that will help

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    • i'll just ask them how their day was or if they have any plans, nothing big, unusual or weird.. so i dont get it..

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    • the guy im talking to just told me his course is at my uni, so i thought maybe we could so something this week, while he has a reason to be somewhat near me, but im afraid if i do he'll just stop talking to me. I know its early, but it way easier to get to know people irl than online, but again it might just be my preference. So i dont know what to do

    • ask some more questions but don't sound too much interested and as the conversation gets a flow ask him to meet you for a movie or date or maybe in college

What Girls Said 1

  • Do you make small talk with them? Maybe they dislike that.

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