Why do people get offended if I don't date single parents?

There was this guy who is 25 with two kids and single. He wanted to get with me, I told him I'm not interested because I don't date single parents. He got so offended that he called me selfish.
When did it become selfish to have preferences? Am i also selfish for not wanting to smokers?
I also got called racist for not wanting to date an Asian guy?
I don't understand why some people feel like I owe them something. You're not entitled to me, you're not entitled to my body and feelings.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Stay away from Single parents. Why? Who wants to deal with ex and child drama?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Because they can't handle rejection , I completely agree with not wanting to date a single parent. When you do that , you're also Inna relationship with the children and you do take on or have to help with some of the parenting roles, its not easy at all especially if you're not ready to always be the second priority.

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    • That and there's a good chance the kid won't like you cause you're "in the way" of their parents getting back together

    • @LucyRose oh definitely , I've met a lot of women and men who were put through hell by the stepkids or the spouses kids , not to mention the ex and how involved they are in the whole situation, it's not easy at all

    • Well yeah. Plus I know how I felt when my dad started dating this lady. She was really nice, and I'm like best friends with one of her daughters now, but she talked about how her and my dad were gonna get married eventually and I didn't like that one bit. I wanted him and my mom to be together as one happy family again.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 22

  • Single parents already know that when they have kids it seriously cuts down on their dating potential for many reasons. Some dont wanna have to compete with the child for the person's affections, some dont want the baby mama/daddy drama and issues. You not wanting to date someone with kids is perfectly understandable (could still fuck em though 😑😒😤 just saying).
    you not wanting to date a smoker, understandable... you not wanting to date an Asian.. THAT's racist... unless the reason is because of the guy not because of the race, then thats different. Like if he was a slob or played games all day... fine.. unattractive qualities, but then another Asian walks up and gets the same rejection... then its racist and you should be ashamed of yourself.

    I like your last line lol..."you are not entitled to me"... but lemme guess... your entitlement is perfectly fine and acceptable right? lol.

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    • I'm just not attracted to Asian guys. I can't force myself. I'm not racist, there's nothing wrong with Asian guys, they are hard workers and intelligent.

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    • Don't listen to that fucking retard saying not liking Asian men is racist. He himself is a racist controlive liberal who doesn't believe people are entitled to their own opinions.

    • @Antvin95 umm... ouch? wait... im racist? thats hilarious.
      i dont think people are entitled to their own opinions?
      wait... where the fuck did you come from?

  • When you are my age, dating becomes musical chairs, it is all fun and games then BAM! All the good chairs are taken, I didn't want to deal with single moms are your age either. Smoking I can understand, former smoker it is a gross habit, for the Asian guy I will say this. Being rejected for something you can't change hurts. I saw a group of white girls look at this one guy like he admitted to killing kittens in his spare time because he didn't date white girls (not that i'm assuming you are white). It may have never happened to you, but when it does. It will sting on a level you never felt before

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    • So is being rejected for not being physically attractive. Something people can't change unless they get plastic surgery or something.

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    • My point is, you can't help who you're attracted to. I can't force myself to be attracted to Asians. It just doesn't happen.

    • I hate to sound like a douche, but the day someone rejects you for something you can't fix without paying tons of money for and you know you'd be good for them. It will sting on a level you never felt before

  • haha, it's not selfish or racist, but it sure as hell is SHALLOW.

    However, there is not reason why people should consider you as a shallow girl. Let's face it, pretty much every woman in the world picks stupid and trivial reasons to date someone such as height.

    That was funny how you pretty much said you don't like it how some people think you owe them something. That's true you shouldn't owe people anything. You should only owe if you want to owe a person but then you say "you are not entitled to me, my body, or my feelings".

    When you say that it tells me that you feel that when you meet others you are more valuable and they must earn you.

    Let's talk realistic though. What do you actually offer someone that they cannot offer as well?
    Sex and that's it, hunny...

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    • Am I also shallow for not wanting to date a smoker or someone with tattoos? I didn't say I'm more valuable than them, it means that I respect myself. I actually don't owe anyone anything.
      How are they entitled to a date with me?

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    • @estoydorado1 Guys become attracted to women for good personalities too. For example, if I met a girl heavy into mechanics or gaming then the compatibility would start to become infatuation.

      A lot of women hate that too. Women are always saying stuff like "I've been friends with this guy and suddenly he's developed feeling and how do I say no without offending him?"
      Happens all of the time.

    • lol, it kind of does.

  • Yet women like to bitch about being called used goods when they sleep around and end up caring for a child on their own.

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    • You're a nazi?

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    • Hard work, risk-taking, and education is exactly Jewish people are successful

    • @Jrossetti and why they're in control of so many aspects of society. Jewish interests and white interests don't coincide.

  • I don't date people with kids either. Just makes sense to me as I don't want kids. Don't let one guys opinion affect you that much, he's a nobody.

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  • "It's like playing someone's saved game."

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  • Because it's a woman's job to care for babies.

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  • They're just bitter because they know the choice they made ended up tying them down in the long run.

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  • They don't want to take responsibility for their actions. Being a parent requires sacrifices, and that extends into your dating life. Once you're a parent, you've automatically closed yourself off from people who don't want kids. That's part of the deal. He shouldn't have had kids if he wanted to date young, childless women.

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  • @macix670
    Your choices are your own business.
    Single fathers are relatively rare in Western society. I suspect that they would tend to be men whose wife/girlfriend had died.

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  • If you're worried what they think, you must have some self doubt. Get the f+-#@ over it!
    You don't owe them sh&t!
    Get on with your own life. You've only got one life... live it!

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  • Because they're god damn idiots.

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  • Because for some reason people think it's a personal attack at them and don't realize that it's YOUR choice.

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  • The problem is not that you have preferences, it's that you feel the need to express them specifically instead of just saying you're not interested/not interested anymore.

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    • This would technically be fine and dandy but there are a lot of people out there who want to know why, for many reasons. Sometimes "I'm not interested" isn't enough and a lot of people don't take it as a serious answer and will keep pursuing until they get a "real" reason.

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    • @lumos You said, and I quote: "this is the type of bullshit I see all the time on here. Guys are so different and they all feel like they deserve to be rejected in their "preferred" way". My point was that you generalized men when women pull a bunch of bullshit as well. You're the one with your panties in a bunch because of certain men that you are incapable of handling. Have a good day honey :)

    • Just because I talked about men, it doesn't mean I haven't noticed women pulling this bullshit. Sweetie. :) I brought it up specifically because the asker is a woman who has clearly been met by offense by the men she's rejected. Cupcake. :):):):)

  • Unfortunately though I have been and my be soon, a single parent again... haha I do not take offense to it... Most people have never been able to take opinion, truth, or rejection and it's only getting worse... Goodluck with everything though, he will find you!!

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  • Because people don't like to be told they screwed up, even if it is the truth.

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  • Well I think a lot of people get irritated just how picky and fussy women are these days. They will reject you over the most minor and ridiculous things.

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  • for me it depends on how I feel about the person

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  • People only get offended if you dont date single MOMS. NO one gives a shit about not dating a single dad.

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    • Bruh and nobody gives a shit about single dads PERIOD. Lol single moms get praised like "how does she do it all" but single dads are supposedly non existent.

    • @Teenagekid16 Oh god, don't me started! In court, the term "traditional roles" kept getting brought up and I finally stopped and talked about how I used to cook all the meals for the family. Post-separation, I continued to cook meals for my girls while my wife would feed our girls Chinese takeout. She was spoken of as if she was somehow a hero because she works and is still able to feed them greasy chow mein for dinner. Well, I work and would find time to do food prep in the middle of the night so that my girls would have actual food on the days I had them. Everyone in the courtroom gave me a "Yeah? Big fucking deal." look.

    • @jp612612 it's even worse when the dad is better suited for kids and the mom isn't.

  • I guess because you're eliminating a lot of potential people you could date but single fathers don't usually have the kids with them so they are usually free unless these are guys actually raising the kids by himself

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  • entitled children who never grew up.

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  • Who cares?

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    • I'm just surprised with the kind of entitlement that these people have.

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    • It's not selfish to not date a single parent. That's ridiculous.

    • Not "you". Them. Those guys. Feminism teaches us all to be self centered narcs.

What Girls Said 13

  • I dont want kids, i wouldn't date a single parent either.

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  • Any single parent who isn't a dipshit should be making their children their first priority and not worrying about who or who is not interested in dating them. He is clearly in tje wrong not you. A lot of these single parents ate weak and expect you to take over the roles that they are overwhelmed with and those aren't even your freakin kids. I have seen this happen too many times. Run, it's a trap! If you aren't into Asians, why should you make yourself date them either? That's stupid. Plenty of people are into Asians so you having the decision not to want to date them is your right. Is there some reason you aren't supposed to be able to choose who you want to date, because last time I checked that was your God-given right.

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  • I can't understand why people get angry, upset or offended when it comes to other people's preferences. People have the right to choose who they date and who they don't.. It's them who'll be dating the person after all. Everyone has preferences. I bet even the single fathers do too. 😏

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  • Cause their single parents and think just because they did it everyone should be cool with it

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  • I think it's perfectly understandable to not want to date a single parent, especially if you're in a position in your life where kids are the last thing on your mind and you have other things you want to focus on.

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  • You shouldn't get trouble about it. I never wanted to date/marry a smoker myself.

    There is nothing wrong with not wanting to date a single parent. He comes with a lot of issues that you would need to deal with. If you don't want to, then you shouldn't because of lot of people could be hurt (everyone involved). Only you know if or when you are ready for that type of relationship.
    We all have preferences including appearances and backgrounds. They should be respected as your preferences because I know people expect you to respect theirs.

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  • It's understandable, I just wouldn't want any drama with the mother, and wouldn't want him to be tied down with all of that

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  • At your age, I don't think its a big deal because most people don't have kids. Now say you were 40 and had the same conditions, I'd suggest you open your mind a bit because most people do have kids.

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  • They are used baggage. If they want to get laid. Use Tinder.

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  • Okay

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  • don't care them

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  • You know, people have different viewpoints and judgements. Well, it's really up to you if you want to continuously get bothered by the comments that you said that does not entitle you. If what they are saying towards you is not true, then it's not true. Just go with your instincts or whatever. Yup, no ones entitled to you, your body nor your feelings. So just be you and we'll be we.

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  • he's just mad because he got rejected

    there's nothing wrong with not wanting to raise someone elses kids

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