Should hot chicks make the first move on nerdier guys? Should I?

I go to a college that is academically rigorous and it's private. The guys here are nerdy, or the jocks we do have are here on scholarship for sports since our teams suck. Anyways, I'm into nerdy guys. Right now, I'm into a couple of guys that (through stalking on fb) I've not seen much girl activity and I think they're busy with school. However (!) I matched with them both on tinder. Tinder for my school though isn't a hookup app.. I've met with many guys on here who did not want to hookup. So please don't tell me it is a hookup app for everyone. These guys don't seem like the hookup type or im sure they would like a girl. That said, I can't talk to one guy in person. Both of us are shy and our class ford not give the opportunity to talk. I can't do it. Should I message him on tinder? The other guy I met in person and will weekly for a lab, but neither of us talked on tinder yet and I kinda want to because I want to go out with him.. but in person I just can't make myself ask him anything. I'm way to shy. And I think they are too. I'm also pretty attractive, im asked out a lot, but not by nerds lol. So what do I do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • message on Tinder than.

    You don't have to ask them out on a date but just start the conversation, and start to let it "slip" that you like them or enjoy their company. This way they feel the pressure of if you like them is no longer there and can open up and relax a bit.

    But they may still be too shy right away to ask you out. But this is a good start.

    Knowing a girl likes me is a great way for me to not be nervous and ask her out with more confidence.

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    • Could I send an opening message as "hey, aren't you in my --- class?" ? Or is that lame?

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    • But it was at 1 in the morning and I'm not going to respond, he didn't ask a question so I don't feel a need to. I guess I'll wait til I see him in class?

    • Yeah, a late night message is not always a good thing to reply to.

      May I ask what he said in his message?

Most Helpful Girl

  • Im not hot, but I've tried with nerdy guys. Theyve all rejected me. So Id probably never go for them again, as the "social" guys seem more interested.

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    • So Ill say no because theyre more likely to reject.

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    • Well I am kinda more of "make it happen and get what you want" so I think I'll probably end up asking at least one of them out..

    • I used to be like that when I was young. Then I gave up now.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 7

  • Nerds tend to be very self-conscious and shy so he probably won't talk to you first. I would break the ice by texting him and then go up and talk to him. At least that's the way I would like a girl to do for me. But I would also like just as much if she came up and just talk to me

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  • yeah, you can do it!

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  • Yes

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  • Absolutely. He will think you aren't interested, and nothing will ever have a chance of developing if you don't initiate a conversation.

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  • go find a man who will sweep you off of your feet

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  • Go for it.. he's likely shy.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Maybe they feel intimidated because you are attractive, and it's a natural thing that guys usually confront, so they rather back off instead of asking you, they would not like to risk.
    Fact is, I am sure they would never expect you to be into them, and I think you should do the first step and see what happens, according to me you have nothing to loose, just chat one guy at a time, try and open up with them , make them also feel comfortable, you seem smart so I am sure you got this.

    Oh, I would never judge those apps, since there are many nice folks in there too, not everyone is a jerk.

    Good luck <3

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  • text them and ask them out.

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