A sneaky way of finding out how your friend got her hands on her ex so YOU can get your hands on him?

Before anyone starts, I don't care about this 'girl codex' junk.

Okay, so I'm crushing hard on a friend's ex. She's with another guy now & seems pretty happy. She doesn't know I like her ex, so I need a really sneaky way of getting it out of her without her noticing.
I talked about her ex to her & she said she wasn't bothered that we were friendly with each other, but she seems kinda tense everytime she sees us standing or chatting somewhere, so I think she WOULD have an issue with me asking her openly.
Any suggestions how I should do this?

Updates:
What's it with people not answering the question & instead feeling self-righteous & trying to lecture other people? Lol.
We're grown people, man, I can date whoever I want, whether she likes it or not.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well if she cares its gonna suck for her. Even if you dont care, you can still try your best to do it in a way she won't get hurt by it.

    And to answer your question, yeah I guess you can ask her why it didn't work out, what made her fall for him, then what made him fall for her, what he liked the most about her, what he used to say about her (you can ask his friends, they may know), why it didn't work out etc...

    Good luck, hope it works out for you and your friend (eg she's cool with it)

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    • I don't really plan on letting her know. Or basically, both he & I are the kind of people that don't really tell others about their relationships. Not particularly hiding it, just... not telling. If someone notices, okay.
      But the way I figure it, we'd both rather not have our common acquaintances know (we're in the same class in a school) at least until summer, where almost all of them will be done & only me & two others will remain (he'll leave, too).

      I already know why it didn't work out (she complained about him to me, I'm the only one in our class who even knows they were a couple), which is one of the reasons I think that he & I are a better match- a lot of the things she complained about would've been totally cool by me (& yes, I already though that before I had the hots for him xD). But the other questions sound good, thanks!

    • well go for it :) hope it works out!

    • ty for mh <3

What Guys Said 4

  • My suggestion is to just go for him. Cause what ever she did it did not work. Maybe ask her how she and him got together and what went so wrong cause they were so good together?

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    • I know what went wrong & they weren't good together, he broke up with her after five weeks, lol.
      & yeah, that's what I'm doing, as you know, I just thought maybe something she could say might be useful, gotta give it all I got. xD

    • Good luck hopefully things turn out well for you.

  • You're a girl, he's a guy. I guarantee if you play out that scenario it'll work to your favor.

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  • I she's really happy, and really a friend, why not just ask her directly?

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    • As I said, she might've said she's okay with him & me becoming friends, but she still seems really tense whenever he & I are chatting. I think hearing about 'him' & 'I' maybe becoming an 'us' would not amuse her.
      I'm not going to risk her going all bitchy on me over this, lol.

    • Just put it to her. "I know you're really, really happy with your boyfriend, right?" ... "So you wouldn't mind it I got together with xxxx. Right? I mean because you're over him, right?"

  • Try grabbing him gurentee your hands will be on him

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What Girls Said 3

  • You're a horrible friend for not caring about her feelings on this.

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    • & she wouldn't be a horrible friend by blowing up on me for going after her ex?

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    • Yeah, but since he broke up with her & I'm 70% sure he likes me back, shouldn't it be her respecting that although they didn't work out, it might for me?

    • You dating him will be even worse for her since he broke up with her. Consider her emotions on it and tell her first that you're going out with him. Hiding it will be much worse.

  • just be like, would it bother you if we hooked up?

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    • Thing is, I don't care if it bothers her, I'm going to do it anyway.
      I just want to know how she originally did it so I can see if I can use that to my advantage, lol.

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    • Should I see the "f*cks you give? Because I don't care if you do or don't really lol

    • @Renae_85
      Ahhh, but you see, you keep coming back to some day old questions of mine to tell me I'm disgusting. I'm inclined to believe that if you truly didn't care, you wouldn't bother doing that & instead just ignore me. :3

  • All I wanted to say is that I hope I never have friends like you.

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    • You are definitely not a grown person if you are looking for sneaky ways to find out how your friend got her hands on her ex. I hope he rejects you.

    • I agree with you 💯 so wrong and so selfish 👎🏽👎🏽

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