My on and off boyfriend says he likes to drink, club and stay in his room? doesn't want to do what I want?

So my boyfriend stopped taking me on dates after a month of us being together. He's either at a bar, a party of playing on his computer. I always go to his events bars and parties even though I'm over that phase. I don't do those anymore but I go for him. So I ask him if he can walk outside with me a little. He says he hates walking.. he's a smoker so his lungs don't work well enough to hike or walk around the neighborhood. He won't even talk to me outside in front of his home. I ask him well how about we go to an drinking arcade? That way we are outside and do what you like so it's a two way thing. He said sure. He becomes distant and we ended up taking a break for a few weeks but he went with another girl to that same place we were supposed to go to and posted it on his social media. He never posts me on his social media.. ever. Everything I suggest he calls weird or stupid but does it with other girls who are his "friends"? I don't understand.


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What Guys Said 2

  • Stick a fork in it. It's done.

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    • Elaborate.
      I know what it's done means but I'm not understanding what happened...
      I did everything he wanted.. gave him space.. did things he liked.. etc.

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    • Sad thing is that I told him I don't think he likes me the way he says he does.. he got angry with me and left. Then he came back... became distant again and had me thinking I did something wrong and left me a second time. He said I'm comforting and I have a good personality but he doesn't want to hurt me.

    • You know your relationship far better than I do, as an outsider. But it doesn't seem like there's concern and care there. Maybe it's different from your point of view. I just don't see that. I'm sorry.

  • that's his choice, he's not gonna be your partner for long

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    • Why do you say that?
      He admits he has an alcohol problem.
      I don't mind partying and drinking but his was excessive.
      He would literally be at a bar 4-5 days out of the week or a party. He would gamble as well.

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    • Everyone told me that. It's weird though.. when I told him "if he doesn't think he's good enough he is and I accept him." He told me it's not about him not being good enough for me. He said he just lost the spark with me.. because he got interested in another girl and didn't want to admit it. Just sucks because I really tried. I tried helping him studying for something that was important for him... told him he should stay away from some things, etc in a kind manner because I cared. I ended up getting kicked to the curb very hard...
      I'll just end this completely and leave him alone...

    • yeah, if everyone said that, may be that's right. as per my experiences I can say that it'll not work out easily in-between you two

What Girls Said 1

  • If that's how he is after one month, imagine how he's going to be after a while. Honestly, I don't see it working out since he doesn't seem eager to compromise in order to meet you halfway.

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