How do you initiate a serious conversation if you are on a date?

Or would it be best to have the serious conversation after the date is over and we are both in the car?
The conversation is about sex.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • After a couple of cocktails (no pun intended) just bring it up! I am not sure what it is so just going with what you gave me... guys usually don't go.. oh this is not date conversation... LOL they will talk about anything... especially sex.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Sex should really not be discussed on a First date. Continue to Nurse and Nurture maybe Something Special Here, dear.
    However, if it has been More dates that have led to Sex of Such, then be Sure you Know it is not some One Nighter where the Guy with a Try, Gets what he Wants and you never Get him Back nor his Respect.
    Be an Adult about it.
    Good Luck. xx

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What Guys Said 15

  • From a relationship coaching perspective, it depends on what your desired end state is. What outcome would you hope to achieve by bringing it up, regardless of when you bring it up? This matters in getting to the right answer.

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  • Depends on the activity. You need privacy and quiet for a serious conversation, so in the car is good, but over a quiet dinner is fine too. Serious conversation is good, it's one of the main reasons for dating. If your date is not ready for serious conversation, is sounds like he's not ready for you.

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  • Just gently layer it in and let them contemplate it and see how they take it. Most of all make sure you haven't waited for them to get wasted if your drinking as a drunked yes isn't. Considered consent.

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  • That stuff you do privately. A it'd be better if you told the guy before the date cause then he expects sex but then you throw this at him.

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    • it's not about having sex. it's about something different, but it pertains to sexual stuff.

    • Still, your ruining the mood lady!! Soooo yeah I love communication anyway. So after the date is cool. If it's bad news before the date. Good news then after. There solved.

  • Ask, "Are you happy?"
    "Are you satisfied?"
    "Are you fulfilled?"
    "Do you have loving parents?"
    "Are your needs cared for?"
    "What kind of sex life do you see for us?"
    "I assume you won't mind if I pay all of our dating expenses..."
    "Talk to me about sex..."
    "I'm so horny! Would you mind if I do your gear shift?"
    "Was it good for you?"

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  • just give some hints about it, don't be to excessive or obvious about it. Isn't flirting all about being subtle?

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  • just talk about it im sure he won't mind

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  • if you can try to ease into it in a non serious way dont try to force the conversation

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  • are you asking about on a 1st date?

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  • the latter is the very best
    the former is only to have fun, get along & get to know each other better

    but in the car sex is The Worst, at least get out somewhere!

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  • I didn't know sex was still something that was taken seriously. But listen, you start by taking out a tit. And if that doesn't work make'm pull over then blow him. That should get it going.

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  • Better to talk about sex in private I think, it's crass to discuss those things publicly.

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  • Well girls can get away with saying anything in a conversation

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  • I love it when you talk dirty. Do I make your horny, baby? Yeah yeah!!!

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  • See how the date then just ask about their views on personal things such as sex

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    • i don't want the convo to make thew date awkward though.

    • Well you may not be able to avoid that so it's best to get it out of the way

What Girls Said 4

  • I think the best time to have a serious discussion is when you are both in a comfortable state. So maybe over dinner, or drinks. Make sure the setting is conducive to having a conversation, so no loud bars or the movie theatre.

    Bring it up casually. I'm not sure what you are planning on talking about with your partner, but you can just start it off like "So what do you think about XXXXX?"

    Try to have a no pressure attitude to the conversation.

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  • Don't get all serious, cuz that isn't fun and kills chemistry. Like, just playfully sneak "innocent" questions and remarks in to see how he reacts, but keep the surface lighthearted. :)

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  • In the car

    On the date it'd be best to just try to get to know each other more, because you might find after talking to him more you don't want to have sex with him. You may change your mind, and want to go straight home after the date. If all goes well on the date, then initiate "serious talk "in the car 😊

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    • Talking about sex on first or 2nd date? I'd think girl is a slut

  • Like how long you wait until you have sex with someone or what you expect from the women during sex.

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