Tinder: What do you usually ask on a first date and what do you ask the person before you meet?

I'm meeting this guy I matched with on Sunday and I'm not sure what to talk about! I don't know what to ask him before we meet. Other than " how are you?". What do you talk about with a stranger? I went in a tinder date once before and it got boring and a bit awkward we were asking each other question after question it felt like a interview haha.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I would focus on talking about your interests. Hopefully he or you will add interesting perspectives, feedback and energy to each others topics. Conversation can often be very open with many ways to direct it and with lots of enthusiastic, effortless energy. Sometimes personalities can just not mesh or compliment each other well though. Also after talking for a long time without listing to the other person can feel difficult to respond to once the person has the opportunity. I'd avoid that unless they really see interest in listening.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Make sure they are who they say they are (snapchat etc)

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    • yeah I have the guy on Snapchat and Facebook so I know he's real.

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    • Yeah good luck :)

    • Thank you ☺️

What Guys Said 6

  • From a relationship coaches perspective, here are some thoughts on icebreakers, things to create a dialogue: "what do you find yourself doing for fun?", "are you into music?".

    "How are you" is always a good first question and the rest of the questions are open ended in that there is no "yes" or "no"--they create opportunities for dialogue. If it doesn't go anywhere, it's because there is no natural chemistry and you can't do anything about that.

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  • Practice forming questios into your conversation. Enjoy the date, you never learn about a person from questions. Don't base your future on someone that talks the talk, but take your time to see that the walk is reflected in the talk. Sometimes we are too much in a hurry to have sound judgement.

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  • what are you guys going to be doing?

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    • He lives like 30 minutes away so we're meeting halfway. He said we can go grab a bite or to the park in the city

  • Just find a common interest and talk all about it

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  • Since tinder is for sex, questions like do you have any std's, when was the last time you were tested, are you aggressive in bed, what are your preferences etc.
    Those would be very important questions to ask.

    Unless you think it's a way to find a boyfriend in which case by using an app that gives you little more than a photo of someone, you are foolishly just rolling the dice hoping to find a personality you like as much as the superficial image and wasting people's time in the process.

    There are dating apps and there are hookup apps. Knowing the difference will stop wasting people's time.

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    • My friend meet her boyfriend off of tinder so I thought I'd give it a shoot. In the beginning I was using out of boredom but then when I matched with someone who lived near by I went on a date with him that was my first meet up with someone online. Which dating apps are you talking about?

  • If you have nothing to talk about beyond ''how are you?'' then it probably means you are boring, don't have many interests and will struggle. However, at your age, it's more difficult to be interesting than when you are a bit older. It's probably part of why some of the young girls go for the older guys.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Hmm... I met my boyfriend online then in person 3 years ago, still happily together... If it is the right person conversation will just flow. Talk about interests and stuff like that. Also always be on the look out for anything weird that you dont like. My ex that I met online was trying to take me to his house the first night and he acted like a douche then apologized and I fell for dating him... then he hurt me emotionally just a few months later. Look for signs of guys like that! Good luck though :)

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    • That's awesome! I wish you many many years together ☺️

      Thank you!:)

    • Aw well thanks! I hope everything works out for you!

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