Why am I sad when my boyfriend is sad? And how can I help him?

My boyfriend has been sad lately here and there, I believe it has something to do with his family as they are having issues (alcoholic cheating father). He says he doesn't wanna talk about it and while I want him to open up to me ik I can't make him. I just want to be supportive and let him know I care and am there for him. We are going to celebrate our 2 months soon and we are pretty close so far. He's said he loves me and I don't know how I feel yet, all ik is that I really care about him despite some differences and when he's sad I'm sad, is that love or just compassion? How do I stop being sad when he's sad?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • From a relationship coaches lens, you are said when your boyfriend is sad because you're empathetic--this is a good thing.

    To your question of 'is that love or just compassion?', I think you answered that question when he said he loved you and you said 'I don't know how I feel yet'. When it comes to love, if you don't know, than no. It's not something that requires thought.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It's because you care about him. You can empathise with him when he feels sad.

    I feel that way too when my boyfriend is sad. It's because It hurts me to see him so discouraged, so I want to try to alleviate his pain.

    You don't need to stop yourself from feeling sad when he's sad. It shows just how compassionate you are. That's a great quality to have. If a person is compassionate it's part of who they are. You can't force yourself to stop feeling compassion , just like you can't force a person to feel compassion for others if they have no empathy.. regarding other people's pain

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What Guys Said 9

  • I'm truly sorry to hear about your man's father. Unfortunately I can relate and it's not easy...
    that being said, trust me when I tell you that you're making the world of difference simply by being there for him!
    it's going to take him some time to open up and that's completely okay. I can tell from your response that you care about him and will be ready to listen when he's willing to share.

    My biggest fear about my past was that I'd end up like my father. with time I realized that my past has infact had the opposite effect and made me into a stronger person.

    if you're ever feeling sad it's important for you to distract yourself and find something happy to talk about :)

    I truly wish you two both the best and I know that this struggle will ultimately bring you two closer together!

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  • you care for him so you are sad when he is sad. and you can help him by letting him know that you are there for him when ever he needs you and GIVE HIM THE SPACE HE NEED. just as you are doing right now.

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  • you don't have to love some 1 to feel empathy it's compassion when a close friend is going through a hard time it makes me feel sad even when it's not directly effecting me. I never been in love but I'm sure when you are you'll just know it's love and you won't need to ask Internet strangers what your truly feeling.

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  • Stop asking unanswerable questions.

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  • It's not just compassion, you're probably either falling in love or you're already in love with him. As to what to do when he's sad and doesn't want to talk, just be with him, hug him, hold his hand, stuff like that. Just be by his side. Trust me, it's the best you can do for him

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  • you're said because you like him.

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  • ok the first part is the that she loves him, we all know that. she also asked how to help him? not talking about stuff only makes it harder you better tell him that if you are going to be together you need to go through things together as well. if you really eachother, then you are a family, and his parents are your parents. so you dont keep thing from your family. and stay away from alcohole hope you guys get through it

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  • You're sad when he's sad because you're empathetic. That's a great quality to have.

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  • listen just feel him that u r always WD him make his mind divert whenever he is in trouble as u r a girl. I think girls hv many ways to make boy feels better in every sense.

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What Girls Said 1

  • You love him

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