Trouble with guys treating me bad?

So, I consider myself being a good girl. I don't flirt, stray or badmouth my boyfriend. I'm trying to be always polite and thoughtful and don't let my moods get the best of me. I don't like partying and rather spend a night with my girls at home, sipping a few drinks and just watch movies or talk books, pets, fashion, or law school stuff. Or, with a few candles and a good book.
I'm shy, though. So, it takes a while for me to open up emotionally and to trust someone. That means that talking about myself can be hard for me and stuff. Got told that it's frustrating sometimes. But I can't help it! And I tend to cry when I'm frustrated. But once I do feel I can trust a guy, I open up and I tend to try to support him, by cooking, cleaning around his house so he can simply relax after work and not have to worry about chores. Sometimes, I like dressing up and having dinner together with a few candles to set the mood.
And, my ex kept telling me that I was great and that he appreciates me being like that and all, however, he still went ahead and cheated on me, multiple times. Telling his colleagues that he isn't seeing anyone, hid me from his family.
And as this has happened the three times I've been with a man, I just wonder if there's something wrong with me. Do I bore them after I've opened up by showing them I love them? Should I do this 'hard to get' stuff that I don't believe in? Or was it just bad luck so far?


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What Guys Said 2

  • He is typical dirtbag. Give him the boot. It'n not you you. Really nice or really shy guys have pretty much given up on dating.

    • Gave him the boot after I confronted him about his affairs, we "worked it out", I forgave him and it didn't take more than a few weeks until he had a girl in my bed.

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    • Totally, however , if you make it clear you are interested including making the first sexy physical moves and they still do not respond then they are too shy to date. Be careful because many shy guys once they get comfortable with a woman are anything but shy.

    • Thank you so much for the advice! I will try that once I feel I can devote to a relationship again!

  • I'm also stumped by your story because you sound like a great girl. You've expressed some amazing qualities, and everyone meets some level of difficulty when opening up to new people. Leaving it up to luck in the end feels wrong as well. I'd like to read more opinions on this question, and see if we can come to a conclusion.


What Girls Said 1

  • you just haven't found a good guy yet


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