I am 23 turning 24 soon and have never been in a relationship?

I don't really get it to be honest.. my best friend who is super gorgeous also has never been in a relationship and yet I have a lot of very average friends ( not to be rude) who have been in a ton of relationships so what are we doing wrong here? I am not saying relationships should be based on looks but honestly, I am studious, I workout and I try to be kind to everyone around me without being a pushover.

The only guys who ever approach me are the macho douchey kinda guys who to be honest are never on the same intellectual level as I am. They tend to be super materialistic and I can't remember the last time I spoke to a guy who was both attractive and smart. Basically, what am I doing wrong? Anyone else in the same boat? I should mention that I have dated a ton of guys (who like I said have been kinda douchey)


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I work with a young lady, about 23-24, maybe, just graduated, and I think she is VERY pretty, but I am pretty sure she is a virgin, and she said she doesn't have a boyfriend!!
    I don't understand that? I would assume, just meeting her, the first time, that she would have at least 3-4 guys, and maybe even a girl, wanting her!! But no!!
    She's not super-religious, but definitely 'Daddy's girl' kind, maybe a little TOO protected.
    The strange thing, is that she openly 'flirts' with me!! I'm not at all a 'HOT' kind of guy, and nearly old enough to be her father!! Is it just the cologne, or some feeling she has, maybe seeing something of a 'father figure'?
    I'm not MEAN, but I do tease her, and smile at her when she is wearing something nice. Maybe a compliment or two, and a 'look'.
    I like her, as a person, a friend, maybe, but she is so young!! I don't really feel anything for her, like in a 'relationship' way, but I wonder what she is thinking and feeling?

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    • Yeah my best friend looks like a model and has just recently lost her virginity because no guys ever asked her out. I lost mine when I was 22 as well and have been told by a lot of guys that I am really attractive so trust me when I say sometimes being attractive is not the best because guys assume you will reject them or that you are already dating someone.

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    • It's a huge age gap but worth a try as long as you don't accidentally get into a sugar daddy type of situation. The best you can do is is show her how smart and sophisticated you are. That's the only way I can see myself dating a guy that age without thinking he's just trying to sleep with me.

    • yeah, that's fine, but I'm just not into that thing. I like her, as a person, a friend, but I DON'T want anything physical, for the reasons you mentioned. I am just concerned that interacting with her, like I do, teasing, and casually flirting, liking her, is maybe giving her the wrong impression!!
      I don't want to be 'sugar daddy' but I wonder if maybe she sees something in me, that she liked about her dad, or something I do that her dad didn't, that attracts her to me?

Most Helpful Girl

  • You aren't doing anything wrong, I got into a serious relationship when i was 25 almost turning 26, and I'm not bad looking myself, and I do understand where you are coming from, but honestly, the best thing to do is just to enjoy life, don't plan it, don't expect nothing, because when you least expect it, it will happen, and you won't even remember feeling the way you feel now...

    <3 just be patient with yourself, focus on priorities, enjoy your life to the fullest while you are still single <3

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 10

  • Yeah, I think the guys you want to date might not have the confidence to ask you out or maybe they are ones you've initially rejected if any. People tend to go by looks alone, only later to see that the person they are with doesn't make them truly happy. Try initiating yourself instead of waiting to be asked. Talk to some guys and if they seem kind of shy give them some time to get used to you.

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  • You're just picky, I know what that's like but at the end of the day you have to rely on yourself to weather the challenge and keep a positive outlook on life. Just because people around you have had relationships, it doesn't mean that they're fulfilling their desired goals for companionship. Just keep doing what you're doing, one smile at a time. You never know when opportunity knocks so just focus on being positive, that way you're the best version of yourself

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    • But I don't want to settle either.. honestly don't know how people spend a month in university and find their soulmate lol

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    • That's very true I guess I could have been in relationship with guys I wasn't that into just for the comfort of it by now but I would rather be by myself than to just get into a relationship just because.

    • Good attitude, I think it's safe to say you'll do well in life. You must be pretty good at reading people, it'll pay off

  • So, you have a particular definition of "relationship" you're using here, if you've dated a ton of guys yet have never been in a relationship. Would you mind elaborating on that a bit?

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    • I mean it's just been dating... we will go on a few dates and they will do something obnoxious or make some rude comment and it's a complete turn-off and I don't want to see them again. The last guy I was close to getting into a relationship with (we were dating for four months) but he had a problem with I quote "poor people" and made some racial comments about people that I didn't like for obvious reasons... also he was oblivious and ignorant to what was going on around the world aside from great sex I felt like I was talking to a wall.

    • So it's not really that you haven't been in a relationship, but you haven't ever had a relationship with someone you really liked and could therefore have been successful.

      Welcome to the club. We consist of about half of the human race.

  • I'm in the same boat.

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  • Yeah, In the same boat, on the guy side though, guys could be intimidated by you and the good ones could assume your already taken, Something I don't understand either. My bad, Not really a helpful answer :L

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  • You either are too picky or you turn guys off with your body language. Attraction is based 90% on body language.

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    • Yeah it's not turning off guys or attraction that I am worried about I have tons of them and I am the one who breaks it off

  • I dont know. Maybe I just haven't gotten around to dating you or your friend yet lmao

    no but seriously... how about gamers. Try those guys, tend to be smart, fun, social and some are quite athletic

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  • Maybe you're just not getting yourself in the right kind of situations

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  • where are you from? are you from religious strict family?

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  • I am in the same boat and Same age group as you girl

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What Girls Said 3

  • Bro. You are definitely not alone. I don't even date that much (but that could be because my standards are too high?) and it doesn't make me worried. I would say try expanding your social circle. There's many, many fishes in the ocean..

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  • Wait for the right time and the right person.

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  • I am single because people are so fake in these days.

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