Is it bad to tell an ex you still love them?

She dumped me (she had her reasons) and went no contact for a couple months. I tried moving and got with other girls but still couldn't get over her. I kept reaching out to her til one day she finally responded and we started talking again a bit. I tell her I'm still madly in love her, and even though she's being nice and think/hope she might still love me too, I'm not really sure especially since she hasn't talked about getting back together so I'm still doing my thing with other girls. Is this ok?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Just because Two people Break up, doesn't mean they Can't and Don't Make up and that it's "Good-bye, my love forever." And with an Ex, who May still have an X in her own Softie Spot Here, dear, there May come a Day when she comes back your Way and You... Tell her I'm still madly in love with her.
    She may Feel it's way too Early to Talk Turkey of Anything as Heavy as this. Go Slow and Don't mention Anything of your Feelings or even Girl Dealings. Be Friends First, and see if Perhaps one day, there is More in Store. Nursing and Nurturing Something Special to See if there Might be another Chance for Romance, is always Best from the Rest.
    Good Luck. xx

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Most Helpful Guy

  • From a relationship coaching perspective, I see nothing wrong with what's going on here. Breaking up doesn't mean feelings are abandoned. You expressing them to her is you being honest and it's not as though you're stalking her or jamming your feelings down her throat. And she's entitled to some time and space to consider where she is-which you seem to be giving her.

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    • Even if I've been casually "seeing" other women, to phrase it nicely?

    • Yes. As you said, she's not really talking about getting back together, she broke up with you, etc. Translation: You have feelings for her but that doesn't mean you owe her anything (or her you). Of course, you ought not tell her your seeing other people just as she's not sharing her love/dating/sex life with you. Right now, you are both doing your thing.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 9

  • Well, I'd sure hate to be one of those other girls. Stay honest and transparent with them. Don't lead them on emotionally.

    I don't know why you guys broke up, but if you are trying to win her back I'd back away from other women.
    The I love you I think is ok if you really mean it.

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    • I hear what you're saying , however the other girls are only purely physical, and we have that mutual understanding.

  • There's no reason for it. You're not together anymore. It's especially sneaky when you're currently seeing other girls. I'm sure they wouldn't be happy to know that you're profusely confessing your love to your ex behind their backs.

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    • The other girls know what we have is strictly casual. I've been upfront about it from the beginning.

    • Even if that's the case, there's no point in you telling her that you love her, especially since she's the one who dumped you. It's time to move on.

  • As long as the other girls realize you are in love with your ex still. Your ex has not given any reason for you to not continue trying to move on.

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  • Of course not it will not only show how you feel for them it may also make the chances bigger of them taking you back.

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  • I'm kinda in the same position. I just recently talked to my ex, and I was hoping on hear that he wanted me back.

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  • i feel like you should ask her to hang out and talk

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  • Only if you feel she still has feelings for you. It's pointless telling her if you know for sure she doesn't still love you, you'd just set yourself you for a rejection. I wouldn't give someone the satisfaction of rejecting me after they'd dumped me on the past

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  • Probably

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  • Nope, not at all. The only way it will hurt you is if she has moved on and doesn't feel the same way and therefore you are upset or etc.

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What Guys Said 10

  • No, not bad. Now this can be right as well as wrong depending on what is your status after you broke up. I mean if you broke up with him but after several months you both still single then it's not at all wrong to tell them that you still love them.

    However if you both have moved on and you both are in another relationship then it's not wrong to still love them, after all they are your feelings so that's ok, but you both should keep that feeling to yourself and not say it to one another, because it would be morally wrong ( in the second scenario of course)

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    • Even if I've been hooking up with other girls?

    • Just hooking up but not being in another committed relationship, right? you meant that right?

      In that case, yes you can tell your ex that you still love them. Otherwise not.

  • Well.. ur ex has totally moved. on.. trust me dude.. u mi8 still b crazily in love with her.. but she ain't anymore..

    better u do one thing.. move on.. avoid her.. don't even talk to her.. no message.. complete cut off.. that way only u would b able to move on... it takes time buddy.. dw.. things will be fine

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  • Kinda desperate sounding but it's ok.

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  • yes. it is bad to tell your ex that you still love her, however these days girls will get back together with an ex before even considering other guys, so go for it.
    girls seem to be overly forgiving when it comes to these things.
    as for doing your thing with other girls, until she says yes, you're not under any obligation to her.

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  • No, let her go and move on. I know it sucks.

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  • nope

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  • yep. yep yep yep yep.

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  • Yes, because you shouldn't. And even if you could, getting back with an ex is a horrible idea.

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  • My wife of 16 years had a totally destroyed my heart and soul. But yes I will love that woman to the day I die

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    • Whoa-may I ask what happened?

    • I betrayed her 15 and a half years ago. And all these years I do not know she had the issues she did. Shameful for me saying that but I did not notice it... I always thought things were good.. and I was true and honest always showed her she was number one but she would never ever believe a word I would say and the day after Christmas she just got up and betrayed me to show me what it's like. And believe me it killed me and changed my life forever. Expecially in the way I handle things in my relationship. I will love again and that one will be lucky

  • Yes, if it's over than its over and don't further complicate things, let it go.

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    • I don't want it to be though-I never wanted it to end.

    • it's cliche to say but it is true: there are other options out there. dont feel bad because you are not the only having this issue. forgetting someone is all about time.

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