Is this girl interested in me or is this a wild goose chase?

Hey guys! I am 24 and the girl I like is 20. So, the girl I really like is a Muslim and highly religious, unlike myself. When I first told her I liked her, she said she could not date and cannot be with me since I am not Muslim. She said the only path is marriage and even if I converted, I would be an option. Then we talked a bit more and more, and she started asking me questions like am I willing to convert, if I am okay with her traveling for competitive golf, about my family and all these personal questions. She had a list comprised of qualities she looked for in a guy and I fit 90% of it.

The next day I asked her for her stance on the situation, and she said she doesn't know. Then I asked her, if she had any interest in us. She replied she does not know since I am not Muslim. She didn't say she didn't like me or liked me. She said she talked to her mom about me, and that she tells her mom everything and that her mom said no, and even if I converted, it is then they will talk. I feel like she's controlled by her religion and her family a lot, but I really like this girl.

I have been asking her out almost every time I see her, usually one of twice a week, and i usually do it in a joking manner, sometimes serious, but I do not want to make it uncomfortable. Every time I brought it up, it was a firm no. She said it would be too complicated and her life has been complicated and does not want to deal with more complications. Now she does not text me as much, and asked me to stop asking her out as her stance won't change. I do not know if she likes me or not, or has she started hating me.

So, my question is, do I still try to pursue this girl or just drop it and does she truly like me or is that just in my head? I mean I really like this girl, and every one I have talked to says we are pretty compatible. And I have dated quite a bit, and this is the 2nd girl in my life that I really have had feelings for, and I have dated quite a bit.


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  • I think it's potentially a wild goose chase. I have some Muslim friends whose families were very religious. Religious Muslims don't "date", they get engaged and married. Dating isn't allowed. I really think you should just pass on this one, she's going to follow what her family tell her, if they don't approve of a guy, then there's no future for her and him. You could convert and they still might not approve of you.

    • Ya, that idea has been floating around my head. Maybe I should cut any and all attention that she receives and see what happens. I do have two classes with her next quarter. She did say I was like the only guy that has actually ever approached her like this, cause she said most of the people guys from her background do not like the "loud" athletic girl. Thanks for the feedback :)

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    • This girl is confusing the crap outta me. Light way shows interest then puts a huge wall between us. Her dad plays golf and put her in golf when she was young. She said, she's not religious enough and wants to be closer to her religion too. It is a very male dominated society, as I am brown too, but just Muslim or religious for that matter. Also she said she didn't want to be distracted by a guy she might catch feelings for (no idea if she was referring to me or in general). She doesn't like the traditional male dominated society she comes from, because she wants a guy who shares the household duties that many Muslim men or brown men in general do not do. That's why I said, I matched 90% of the list of qualities she's looking for in a guy.

    • This girl is very confused, she wants her cake and eat it too, she wants the best of both worlds. She wants to be more religious but wants a modern guy. Sharing household chores, etc are what modern Muslim guys would do (and even then, that's a VERY modern Muslim guy). Also many modern Muslim guys really aren't that religious because it's a male dominated religion, the woman takes care of home and hearth, meaning she takes care of household chores. The two things she wants, religious and modern, are very conflicting. Also, don't forget, it doesn't matter if you watch 90% of what she's looking for, you have to watch 90% of whatever her mom/dad/brother (s) are looking for because she's not marrying without their approval (especially if she wants to be religious/filial).

  • Don't really know


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