Is it Okay to Pressure Girls into Sex?

Lets be flat out honest with ourselves, guys have physical needs greater than women. I think it is perfectly okay to let a girl know that if she isn't putting out within the first 5-10 dates, then I am going to start looking elsewhere. Some think it is mean, but I am being honest up front. If you take to long to put out, then I am down the road jack.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't make ultimatums. If you aren't getting what you want, just leave

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Some guys draw the line at 3 dates. Besides, most women will decide fairly quickly whether or not you are fuckable.

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    • The thing is you can't be blunt with women. The problem is she doesn't want to feel "cheap" or be a "slut." So, if she doesn't put out by the 3rd date, attempt to sleep with her, but if she refuses, ghost her.

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    • Preach that word son^

    • I'm sorry for the rant, but it is eye opening to see the responses from the female side.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 13

  • Are you out of your mind? Sex is a WANT, NOT a NEED. If you can't learn to control your sexual urges then whose fault is that? Not her's. Your's. I believe in waiting the way God intended: Saving sex for marriage. Even in marriage, it is a mutual agreement. You're not going to die from lack of sex. Men get blue balls because of:

    1. They are already sexually active and haven't had sex in a while
    2. Not having better self-discipline and self-control and indulged in Masturbating. Which can lower sperm count and cause physical problems such as Fatigue and depression.
    3. In response to masturbation, your watching porn, which is also making you have a more dire need for sexual stimulation. Again, goes right back to #2. Take steps #2 and #3 and repeat.

    That is what many of you are doing to yourselves. And yes, while I know guys can still get blue balls even if they never had sex, masturbated or watched porn before. But if they have better self-control, chances of getting blue balls is far more minimum. Yep, did my research so no excuses.

    You have the right to lay down what your look for on the 1st date. Don't wait till things get too emotionally involved for you to look for sex. Say it to her straight. Don't say how you expect this and that you refuse to tell her what your intentions are. But if that is your attitude understand us women have terms and conditions also. But never it is okay to pressure anybody for sex. That is why I refuse to date today. I so refuse to avoid guys who are thinking women are to be used for sex. You are not illegally married to these women, therefore you don't go around demanding something that has nothing to do with courting/dating a woman. Don't like it, keep it moving. I respect guys who don't beat around the bush before I start accusing them win the reality is they just want sex. Besides if you treat women poorly the less likely they would want to have sex with you anyway.

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    • Depression isn't physical

    • @meandane It's psychological with physical repercussions. Some experience it early, others may take a while. You basically can get the physical symptoms that come's with depression such as lack of appetite as an example.

    • not legally married to these women*

  • Go look somewhere else, then.

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  • Have you ever thought that maybe an attitude like that is why you're still going out on dates instead of being married?

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    • Would you rather I not be honest about my intentions? Should I instead lie and say I totally want waifu material for a long term relationship just until I get you in the sack? Maybe my tactics are blunt and rough, but at least they are honest.

    • It's not about being blunt, it's about being the type of person who would thinks what you think.

  • No it isn't. Its rape. If they take 'long to put out' and you're not okay with it then clearly she isn't the one for you.

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  • BYE.

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  • Go ahead and tell her that. Then she'll figure out she's dating a piece of crap

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  • What? Where the hll am I

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    • This is reality babe. Life is full of harsh truths. Get used to it.

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    • Little girl, you have a lot to learn.

    • Mhhmmm well, let's just hope I won't have to learn dis one lmao

  • Its never okay to push anyone (male or female) in whatever subject. It should be free will.

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    • Just because girls feel pressure to have sex with guys or else they will leave doesn't mean that it takes away their free will. They still have total free will to decide if they are gonna sleep with a specific guy or not, but the reality is that you are never going to escape pressure in life. There are life pressures surrounding us all the time and sex is no different. Guys have physical needs that must be met. If they are having those needs met by you, then they will go somewhere else. Sorry Charlie, but is just the way it is in harsh real life.

  • Be honest that you have sexual needs, but if she doesn't want to leave her. Don't pressure her into sex. That's just cruel and can cause damage to the girl.

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    • Society pressures me to pay for all that date and shit, why should girls be completely free of pressure?

    • Well first of all I think girls who expect the man to pay are assholes. It's an absolutely sexist and unfair expectation for men. That's why I always pay for myself or treat the guy.
      #feminismforever lol.

    • Anyways why not just find a fuck buddy instead?

  • I don't think it's right to pressure anyone for sex. Leaving is good if you can't respect her and her needs as well, it isn't going to work anyway.

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  • Lol bye

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  • it is okay

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  • Someone please tell me that this is a troll post. :|

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    • Not a troll post at all. I have no problems taking a girl out, buying her things, and generally having fun, but the clock is ticking. I am not going to waste a lot of money on expensive date because you personally think your vagina is made of gold. If you don't put out, there are a lot of other girls that will. Nothing in this world is for free, and everything comes with expectations. Get used to it.

    • "nothing is for free"
      What about air?

      By the way, you do you, just don't manipulate anyone into sleeping with you.

What Guys Said 11

  • yes you are right guys have much more physical needs than girls...
    that's an way to show. love and insure that she only loves you...
    BUT TRUST ME THE THING YOU ARE DOING IS TOTALLY WRONG.
    winning a heart is always important...
    anyone can win a body...
    first go and learn how to love...
    Sex is not everything...
    if you are only for sex then do a favour on yourself and her... leave her...
    guys like you just want sex. play with feeling and emotions and in last make other like. yourself...

    trust me being a Boy like you is very easy..
    and there are many boys like you in this world...
    respect a women and value her feeling..
    be a men before entering and falling in love and relationship
    and treat her like a gentleMen...

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  • Ya know, you could always go and pay for a prostitute if you're that desperate.
    Do you really have physical needs greater than women? Or are you just too weak willed to handle your sexual deprecations?

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    • Wrong word. Rip me. Frustrations*

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    • Nope, I am not looking for a prostitute. I want a relationship, but I have needs and if they are not being met by a girl I am dating, then I will simply move onto the next.

    • Well, hopefully you find one without forcing it. I mean, I guess I understand a different standpoint from this. Being open with her about your crave for it. Holding it in isn't exactly the healthiest option either. Sorry for coming off as an asshole earlier. Just don't make it sound like that's all you're going for, otherwise it's a deal breaker for most, ya know?

  • "I think it is perfectly okay to let a girl know that if she isn't putting out within the first 5-10 dates"

    I think its fine to have that mentality. Realistically most girls have had sex by the third date or even sooner with a few of their previous partners so if you're paying to take her out and she still hasn't slept with you by the 5th date then she probably isn't as attracted to you as she was to the other guys. She perceives you as being of lower quality and I don't blame you for not wantung to waste your time on a girl who isn't as excited to sleep with you as she was with her exes.

    That being said, I don't see the value in actually telling her about this ultimatum. Just keep trying to naturally progress towards sex and if doesn't happen by the 5th date then just stop seeing her without saying anything.

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    • Pay attention to what the other girls said. Telling them the ultimatum upfront makes them more likely to lose interest and less likely to sleep with you. The guys who got her into bed by the third date didn't have to give an ultimatum. It just happened naturally. So keep the ultimatum, but don't say anything about it.

  • No need to pressure them. With a little patience they will ride the D like it's their last D ever, just when they decide to come to you

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  • Well, if you're not looking for commitment, it's better to declare your intent early on, than to string her along unknowingly, so that she can decide whether you're worth her effort. I wouldn't call that pressure, rather as you said, "being upfront".

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  • Why the hell would that be okay?

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  • Girls have emotional needs though, and using them for our pleasure can cause them pain. It's where we need to be patient

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  • 5 - 10 dates? More like 2 - 4.

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  • I really don't know. I am all for being up front and honest. Also I don't think such an ultimatum is a good idea

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  • This question came out of nowhere lol, i kinda get where you're coming from but the way you're saying it is so bad xD

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  • This isn't being honest, this is having the wrong priorities.

    Plus, it's kinda of a waste to lose someone that might be really good for you only because you diverged on something that stupid.

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