As an average/ below average looking woman I have dealt with my share of bullying. Through time I have developed my own way of picking men that I think will be the best for me. I seek out men who may understand me. For example I am not societies pick for body type, so I go for guys that are attractive to me but slightly off to most. Perhaps he's chubby, or small. The intent is to be with someone that may have dealt with the same criticism and will likely be less critical because the understand. Sadly I could't be any closer to wrong. The most unappealing guys STILL expect a near perfect 10. Fat guys call women fat, and guys with zero muscles complain about small chested women. Explain this to me? Should I rise my expectations to be as unrealistically high, or am i missing something here?
Most Helpful Guy
You know, the way I see it is that it's all in the game. The thing is, for the most part, men and women aren't competing against other men and women. They're competing against the single life and unfortunately/fortunately being single really isn't that bad. I mean, sure some people REALLY want to be with someone and those people will get paired off quickly, but you should sort of expect high expectations from those who are satisfied with not being attached.
I mean, I'll be honest -- I'm a very short guy. And I learned a long, long time ago and short guys are not the most sought after, but you know what? I don't feel sorry for myself (or other short guys) because the women of the world do not owe me anything. Similarly, I don't feel sorry for fat girls either because no guys owe them either.
But in the end, I'd say that you just shouldn't worry because as I get older, looks matter less and less to me. It's not because looks fade with age (and they do) nor is it because I've "lowered" my standards, but because as you get older, you just learn that most of the criteria that you had for a prospective mate are a bunch of things that don't even fucking matter. But the things that do matter? I'm immovable on those points.1