Most Helpful Guy
Imagine being the other person! Being strung along for a year by someone who can't make their mind up. You'd eventually figure they were keeping you around until something better came along.2
Most Helpful Girl
ABSO-FREAKING-LUTELY. Studies have shown that when you date someone, dating can be broken up into stages before you can really know if you love them.
1-3 mo (Honeymoon): Rose colored goggles, partner can do nothing wrong, you blindly accept all flaws
4-6 mo: people start showing true colors, jealous occurs most here, red flags start to come up, and fights are most prevelant. This is when most couples break up
6-9 mo: if you can make it to this stage, you more than likely really DO love your partner, you were able to accept those flaws from the previous stage and know that you guys can really get through anything, true colors and all.
9-12 mo: probably the best time to decide on marriage or not
I am not saying love is down to an exact science and some people find their partners right away or some people need even longer than that to adjust to their partners lifestyle and habits. But, what I am saying, is that the longer you take to date, the better it is. Long dating, short engagement, long marriage. This is why the first year of marriage, so many short term dating couples divorce. They don't know each other well enough yet, fights occur, they blame it on not loving each other ("falling out of love") and don't hold out long enough to see that that's the person they want to be with. Or if the red flag was so big in their marriage, if they would've waited longer they may have been able to save themselves from divorce by just breaking up. It's all about pushing past that first and second stage and deciding whether you can accept this person's flaws that are now showing. Every person has flaws, it's up to you to decide if they're worth loving them for their flaws or if the flaw is too much and will be toxic to your relationship in the end.
Also, on a completely different note, it's also not good to live with someone before marriage. Divorce rates are much higher for those who live together before rather than waiting. I think it's because when you live together it gives you this idea of, "I can leave whenever I don't like this person's flaws". The whole point of marriage is to move in together, start a family and NOT LEAVE. Otherwise, it's just a piece of paper. It keeps you out of that mindset.
Just date, have fun and when the time comes, get married to the one you know you love and then live together. You will have a much higher chance of success :)1