Whats wrong with me?

Is it normal that all guys i have been in a date with change their mind after 1st date? they try too hard in the beginning, we go out and both of us enjoy it, and then by second time they change their minds.. i am very successful in my career, independent, and have a strong personality


Most Helpful Guy

  • nothing wrong from what i have read it could be your finding guys who are not into women that are so independent myself i love that in a girl. in fact i have said once or twice i would date a hard core feminist.

    as long as they didn't throw male pig testicles at me which i saw at a demonstration once lol.


Most Helpful Girl

  • It could be that they liked you but didn't think they clicked with you romantically. And that is only something you find out in person. They clearly liked you or else they wouldn't have tried hard in the beginning. Also, you mention that you were busy and such earlier in life, I think you need to just get used to dating, there is a lot of rejection, a lot of I thought the date went well and we clicked but apparently he didn't because he never messaged me after. It's just the nature of dating so I wouldn't be very concerned.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 5

  • What type of guys? Where are you finding them? How old are they?

    • Different characters, very smart and have a good career, almost workaholic, 35+ .. i meet them in work, classes, social life , not clubs or bars

    • If they're as successful as you are in their careers, social life, etc., then from the few things you've described, it's probably your strong personality. Women with a strong personality are usually intimidating to guys unless those guys have an even stronger personality.
      Strong personality types, both male and female, are not easy to match, unfortunately. I have a strong personality, and I like women with strong personalities. But to be honest, most of the women I like and ask out are avoided by other guys, even my own friends, because they're intimidating. I find them refreshing because I can be myself with them.
      Keep heart! If ordinary guys can't handle you, find an extraordinary one. They're out there.

  • Why are you in this situation and asking this question at age 30-35?

    • Haha when i should ask it then?

    • Show All
    • continued 2 . . .
      The immediate issue at hand is the reaction of the men whom you are dating.
      Without being a fly on the wall during the date, it is not possible to offer any meaningful ideas about what might be going wrong for you.
      What sort of men are you dating?
      How are you meeting them?
      About what do you talk?

    • continued 3 . . .
      I can make one suggestion that might allow you to put the odds more in your favour.
      Use an old-fashioned introduction agency, one that has an office and wants you to go there for an interview.
      To use sales terminology, you will be introduced to pre-qualified prospects. In this case, it will be men who fit the profile that you specify, which will include looking for a relationship.
      Other than the fee (women get it a lot cheaper than men), you have nothing to lose. . . except your loneliness.
      As you have probably learned by now, dating sites are both toxic and dangerous.
      Old-fashioned agencies make everything traceable and everyone identifiable, so the Ted Bundy types would not go there (probably).
      Compared with dating sites and randoms at a bar, agencies are a much safer way for you to meet men and, as I stated, you will be much more likely to meet men who are looking for what you are looking for.

  • you didn't find the right guy yet. one that doesn't get intimidated by a strong independent woman

  • nothing is wrong with you, they probably just didn't connect with you like they wanted.

    • I am being very clear that i am looking for stable relationship- i am not interested in unnamed relations

    • you probably just haven't met the right person

  • how many?


What Girls Said 1

  • It might be the guys, not you. Open your interests to different men maybe all of them are all too similar. Love is out there. Do not fret