In shape women, have you ever worn clothing to a first date that minimalizes your physical assets?

So I've done this because I had a serious illness that caused me to gain 17 pounds in my twenties due to meds which is a lot on my frame. I was a size 2 prior to steroids, working out and. Orhing about me. Had changed other than that weight on my small frame.

I went up to a size 8 but couldn't help it because I couldn't workout and the meds made me gain weight.

People treated me differently, thought I was a loser (if they didn't know I had a medical condition), even my clients treated me differently.

I had an autoimmune disorder and was lucky enough to find a drug that was $5k a shot every 6 weeks that cured me.

I behan running marsthons again and got raise after raise for losing 22 pounds making me a size 0. Once I was healthy to run the weight fell off and I actuallly had to eat a lot everyday to keep healthy once I was off prednisone for good.

But then sometimes I get asked for a date by guys online, irl or through connections. My first instinct is to wear an outfit that doesn't show my banging body. I don't want him to think she's hot let's go.

I've honestly lost some dates this way and am proud of it. They see me agin in rocking jeans and a tee shirt and want to open the door. But my thought are, you either like me in a pleated dress with an okay body or you don't.

Is it wrong to hide your body to first establish if you like one another at all?
  • Yes
    Vote A
  • No
    Vote B
  • Maybe
    Vote C
  • I don't know
    Vote D
  • Hell no
    Vote E
  • Results
    Vote F
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Most Helpful Guy

  • I voted maybe by which I mean 'sort of'.

    It's complicated enough I don't have time to ramble on it without being able to give a clear answer. But if nobody has anything interesting to say but me and I will attempt something.


Most Helpful Girl

  • With all due respect, I think you've got the premise all twisted in the first place.

    I have never ever ever met a single straight man who finds size 0 bodies more "banging" than size 8 bodies. Literally, not a single one, ever.
    And I'm not just pulling this out of a blue sky, either. I was an editorial fashion model, and I didn't even claw my way out of the "underweight" BMI range until after childbirth.
    My whole life, as soon as I've "gotten fat" (= gaining about 10-15 lbs, which is the most my body ever let me gain even taking into account monthly fluctuations) I've ALWAYS experienced an avalanche of increased male sexual attention. Including from every man I've ever had a rl with, and those men's eyes weren't out of commission when we met, lol.

    So... you are fretting about something that's not even a something.

    ... Unless you're like 4'10" or something (I have no idea how tall you are).
    For women of average height, a size 8 is a perfectly normal size. For tall women it's on the slim side. Thinking that a size 8 is "fat" is ridiculous to the point of insanity, unless you're talking about women under 5 foot.


    Also -- Unless you're under 5 feet tall...
    If you rlly *did* experience disrespect and/or maltreatment when you gained that modest amount of weight, then, it wasn't the weight.
    Remember, the vast majority of people are just mirrors of whoever has the strongest emotional vibe. If YOU were walking around feeling like complete shit about yrself, then... well, **of course** that's what you would get from anyone you interacted with. If you walk around with an emotional vibe THAT intense, then, people can't help being mirrors.

    As further evidence that THIS is rlly what's happening... I'm going to bang that drum about sizes 0 and 8 some more. You're implying that (i) a size 0 is "banging", and (ii) a size 8 is "fat".
    From the standpoint of normal people -- especially straight men who like to fuck sexually mature female bodies, and double-especially past the age of 30 or so -- these ideas are, respectively, (i) completely fucking batshit insane, and (ii) completely fucking batshit insane.

    So, the problem isn't what's inside yr clothes... it's what's inside yr head.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Don't hide your body. Show your natural body and if possible without any make up. I like it that way. Man should learn to appreciate women even if they don't have a perfect body.


What Girls Said 5

  • I consider my assets my muscles and I like them to be exposed because not all guys like very muscular chicks and is only fair to let the guy know what kind of body I have and I love it when they can't keep their eyes of my muscles, I feel like my hard work is appreciated

  • I think it can be useful. See if they find you interesting fully dressed

    • Right, as tempting as it is to be like, 'this is my body'. Most guys your meeting for the first time don't need to know that. like in. A proper dress they can see you aren't fat and have a figure and face.

  • Hoodies hide my boobs and I've worn those on a date, people that date me know I take comfort seriously lol

  • I never have. If anything I wear clothes that show off my shape. But then again, I do not think there is anything morally wrong with a man finding my shape attractive even if that is the only thing that initially he finds attractive about me. I think that is natural and a completely amoral thing about men.

    It sounds like you put a moral weight to it, "I've honestly lost some dates this way and am proud of it."

    Not sure that is really fair to men. I believe it is natural for men to be attracted to a women first physically and then secondly by their person.

    I do not think this makes them shallow or superficial; I think it just makes them men.

    Sorry to hear about the health issues you had. I am glad you are passed them. I hope. :)

  • Yup. Helps weed out the ones who only wanna fuck me and dump me


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