Do you enjoy or dislike dating?

I was discussing this topic with friends last night after one friend mentioned being on Tinder and Bumble, two different dating apps. She was saying how she hated the dating scene and just wanted to find someone she truly enjoyed being around instead of dating all these duds and feeling like she's wasting her time. My other friend was on the opposite end and had fun going on dates with different guys and doing activities that she might not normally do/think of on her own.

As such, what do you think about dating, folks? Why do you feel the way you do?

Do you enjoy or dislike dating?

  • I love it!
    Vote A
  • It's okay.
    Vote B
  • I haaaaaaaaaate it!
    Vote C
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I loved being single and dating around. I enjoyed the whole process of having a great time with a girl's company. I think several things made the process enjoyable to me.

    1. I wasn't looking for anything but a good time. If I found more than that, wonderful, but otherwise I'm totally happy just having a great time with a girl.

    2. I became a bit of a selfish dater. I stopped trying so hard to show the girl a good time. I was interested mostly in just enjoying myself first and foremost. My personal enjoyment was my number one priority, her enjoyment is secondary. As a result, I just did whatever I wanted. If I was sitting at a cafe and I was getting bored talking to a girl, I'd just blurt it out. "I'm getting bored, let's go on a walk." She's free to tag along with me but I'm just gonna do whatever I want to do.

    3. In Japan there isn't this type of tradition of waiting arbitrarily long to have sex. As a result if I went on a date with a girl, we typically had sex fairly soon within the first few dates, so at least I got sex out of it and that was typically quite enjoyable.

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    • I think your first point could be helpful to more people, so they don't find the dating process so tedious and annoying.

    • Second point might actually help some guys too. I mean it sounds bad, being "selfish" in this way and focusing on my own good time over hers, but I found when I embraced this mindset that I was actually succeeding in entertaining my dates more. Before I was trying too hard to impress the girl and show the girl a good time in ways that were preventing me from having as good of a time and also in a way that made me nervous. When I got over that and just did whatever I felt like, it helped both me and the girl generally have a better time together.

Most Helpful Girl

  • i put its okay.. when you meet someone you really get on with and click with i like it but for the most part i find it awkward and time consuming and no fun at all if anything like a chore sometimes having to meet the frogs until you hope eventually you find your prince

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 36

  • Dating may be harder on women than guys because girls have a time clock and crave a sense of security. Men I think are less at that... although I know an inexperienced 30's year old guy who "wants" but cannot "find" what he wants. He's got a long ways to go to develop, but he's learning...

    In general, If you want something but cannot find it, you are frustrated. if you enjoy the exploration and make the most of the moment one has, you are happy. e. g. focus on the good.

    I've experienced both.

    Early in life, dating and not having any fun, rejection with no confidence, no connection, or too strange of girls, or not knowing how to relate. I did not know how to date, knew nothing about girls, so it was no good for me or the girls. Online dating being frustrating sending out hopeful messages and getting no response, or you think you have something and get dumped, can be awful.

    I had good dates along the way. I learned to be like the 2nd friend, enjoy where you are, make the most of what you have, and care for the person in front of you, even if it is just information, encouragement, or something more.

    My girlfriend is great, we have a lot of fun together, great conversations and more.

    Isn't life living to the fullest in the moment you have, not some "goal" set in your mind that may never be achieved because... as example... texting while doing 70mph and didn't see the jammed traffic ahead... whammo! .. its happened unfortunately! Live in the moment and focus and that problem doesn't exist. Want what you have and you are happy?

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    • All good points. I definitely see where you're coming from. I think it's just hard to do at times when you're so set on wanting to find that special someone.

  • I think the dates could be nice overall in a friendly way. I wouldn't be concerned with matching with the person or accomplishing any physical contact which probably stresses a lot of guys. Finding a person where they match what's important I think would be difficult for most. I can see why a lot of people are frustrated when dating. I wouldn't pressure myself like I think people tend to do though. I mean like I wouldn't be worried about matching. I actually would probably ward against​ it. Relationships are great, but choosing wisely is important too i m o.

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    • You definitely need to make sure you two are compatible should you decide you want a relationship with someone. That takes a while to figure out sometimes, too, as you get to know the other person.

  • I miss it sometimes. Meeting new and different girls is fun - I am talking about the old fashioned way when you went up to girls you liked and struck up a conversation. Not picked them out of a catalogue like online dating these days.

    The voting is quite telling though, people want everything handed to them these days.

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    • That's just true for everything, the "people want everything handed to them" part, haha. We're so used to being able to get things almost at the drop of a hat, so dating isn't much different. However, that said, I do get why it's frustrating because you can go a long time without meeting someone you really click well with. That's fine if you're okay just going on dates, but if you are ready to meet someone special, it can be quite bothersome.

    • I think it's only frustrating if you let it be your main focus in life.

      One thing i do laugh at in this silly world is that the less you try to find someone, the more quality candidates seem to flock to you lol Β¬__Β¬. By the time the right person does come along, you have a 50/50 chance of not caring that much.

      Personally i'd date your second friend even based on that 1 line description. Simply because she sounds far more balanced dating wise since - she's not rejecting guys left right and center citing every reason under the sun like your first.

    • Well, sorry, but she's taken. ;P Hahaha, I don't blame you, though. I understand where my first friend is coming from, but she doesn't really give guys any chance on dates either.

  • Dating is what you make it out to be. And it will have it's ups and downs and isn't always going to be a smooth ride. It depends what dating sites and apps that is used.

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    • True, different dating sites yield different results. That's an important thing to note.

    • Show All
    • All good points. I've heard that issue as well. Even my area can be tough to find dates in as it's a smaller community where everyone seems to know everyone, haha. It's not always a bad thing, but it doesn't help in the dating world.

    • Haha lol yes everybody in the community knowing each other is good for safety reasons and making friend's and helping each other out. I agree its bad for dating because once a bad break up happens everybody will know the details. And that is how rumors and gossip starts spreading. And people want to get in your buisness. lol. Yeah I read so many stories of people in smaller communities branching out to other areas to find dates. Some people travel an hour to hours away to date. I guess it depends if it's worth the time and effort.

  • I am not a fan of the "games" that come with dating. Like waiting 2 days to contact her, or not replying right away to a text message, or anything that is done so that you can "play hard to get".

    I understand if women have rules they follow to make sure the guy is honest about being with her and make sure it's a serious thing but not the hard to get stuff.

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    • I see the concern there. I feel like, if you really like someone, that you should just go for it and message when you feel like it. Of course, don't come off as creepy, but don't be afraid to text her the next day if you really like her.

    • What about a simple text when you get home from that date to say "I had a great time with you tonight." ?

    • I'd be fine with that.

  • I haven't even started and I already hate it haha. Ugh, can we go back to arranged marriages already. Just kidding... sort of. >.>

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    • Hahahaha, I mean, you can move to a country that has that...

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    • Meh, I'd rather just stay single than be in an arranged marriage with an ugly girl. Most arranged marriages are for political reasons (if she's ugly tough shit, hot then you got lucky) and they still exist if you live in places like rural Pakistan.

    • Or Saudi Arabia.

  • It's a regular bombardment of stupid bs, basically a battle of egos.
    I can't even take it seriously half of the time.
    Then there's people who just put ask me on their profile while I can understand wanting to be able to have more conversation to go through but personally I like something to catch my interest like a favorite common activity or even what they're looking for in a relationship.
    It's to the point where I just hop on once a week read a few profiles then get annoyed with it and leave it be for another.
    This is all for online dating though.
    Which is way out of my normal zone in the past I would just hang out with girls and see where it went.

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    • Yeah, my friend is one of those girls that just has her photo up and no bio. My other friend and I are like, "Uhhh, that's not helpful." Haha.

    • Yeah online dating almost makes the pay sites worth it.

  • I'm not a fan either. I would skip the whole dating part and go straight to the relationship, but I know that's not gonna be very possible unless the girl has been a friend of mine for a while.

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  • It's excellent with the right person but pure hell with the wrong one

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  • dating can be fun if you're looking for just some quick fun I don't like it because I'm at the point in my life where I just want to settle down with someone who I can also be myself with and the same should be said for the other person I hate dating

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    • Yep, sounds like part of the conversation I had last night.

    • ya well it's how I live I don't like the short fun I want to find the one person I can love and be with and have the same reciprocated but no such luck on my end right now

  • I agree with your first friend. I'd rather find the right girl sooner, than spend time with many.

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  • lol. bumble and tinder are hookup apps.

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    • Nah, I've heard of people having more success on Bumble. Tinder, on the other hand...

  • I like it. It's just when you run into people in life at the wrong time it's tricky. Like a girl who you hit it off with who has a boyfriend. Years later, can you really say something when she becomes single? I wrote a question, wonder if you can help me!

    Also you wrote a great question!

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    • Yeah, that's a good point, too.

      Thank you!

    • it's really difficult to know what to do. Trying to work it out with 3 girls right now who I encountered this way!

      If you can help me out with 1 of those, I'd appreciate it! See with a different one, she seems to jump at or have no issues meeting me 1 on1. With others, they don't seem to take a hint or give me such mixed messages

  • Too tedious when all I want is the pussy and maybe a BJ and that's easy enough to deduce from just looking at her, I don't need to burn the hours having to hear her life story while she stuffs her face. She can talk about that shit after we fuck and I'm sleeping while listening to her (call it multitasking).

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    • Has Tinder been of any help to you?

    • Never bothered, seen 1 regular dating site you seen them all. I just use Backpage and Relax2U mostly and just streamlined the process of getting laid.

  • dating is the worst. iΒ΄d love to skip that shit. it always feels like writing an exam i never studied for.

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  • It's nice to see I'm not the only one that HATES it!

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  • It's annoying having to tell your life story over and over and over again.

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  • Depends on the date. Generally: it's alright I spose. lol

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  • I agree with your first friend I really don't like having to keep trying to find the right one

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    • Yeah, I was more on her side of things as well. Seems exhausting to go on a bunch of dates and feel like you're not getting anywhere.

    • Yeah really is exhausting and being disappointed every time if you're not going to continue further

  • i haaaaaaaaaate it!. becuase probably im a introvert. and im very and too much awkward when meeting with someone i dont know at all

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  • I can't say it has been entirely great for me. I've been on some dates that I was like "wow that was a waste of time and money." several times. I'm very happy with my current girlfriend and can see long term potential with her.

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  • I would love to do it more frequently... haven't been very succesful in dating :o

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  • I enjoy the getting to know each other aspect. A nice scenic walk are the best dates I've been on.

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  • I enjoy dating with strangers

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  • Dating sucks plain and simple

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  • I don't like it either and would rather just have that one person I want

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  • in order to date, you have to meet someone or have someone respond. smh

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    • Yeah, no responses gets incredibly frustrating.

    • also I rarely drink and didn't go to clubs. not to mention I rarely work with any women in my occupation.
      so... you can see some difficulty there

  • I've never been on more than one date with a woman since 2010ish when I broke up with my ex.

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  • Never been on a date in my adult life, so I don't know.

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  • Depends on who it's with

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  • More from Guys
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What Girls Said 16

  • I hated it when I was on the scene. I would always get my hopes up and then find out the guy was an a-hole. I had men lie about being married, one told me he "used to gay" but was making a change... just weird stuff. Thankfully, I am happily married andnplan to stay that way.

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    • I'm glad you found someone special, even if you had to sift through a bunch of weirdos.

    • From your lips tin God's ears! I wish everyone was so lucky!

  • I go through phases where I love it. The trying new things, going to new places, meeting new people, etc.

    But it does get exhausting and there are times where I just would rather lie in my bed and binge watch TV shows and be completely okay with being alone forever.

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  • I'm with the first friend. I seriously hate the dating game! Especially when I kind of have an idea of what I want. I get turned off easily as well so the slightest things can x a guy off my list. Then I feel like I'm going through the high school stage all over again. Finding out the persons likes and dislikes. Trying to get their sense of humor. Getting to know someone all over again. Plus continuing to get to know them more as the relationship moves forward. It's a waste of time. Commonly people feel within the first 30-45 minutes of a date if it's going to work out. Yet how can you really know that in that short length of time? Then it's the nervousness, the anxiety, etcetc. Most men I've been dating always want to do the same things as well. Either dinner or a movie. So cliche and boring. And when I suggest other things they shoot it down. Also a lot of men nowadays don't even know how to hold a conversation. It's a lot of, "Wyd" and "how're you" and then the cycle repeats.

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    • Blame technology and social media for people not really knowing how to hold conversations anymore. It's so easy to send a text and not put much thought into it, especially at the beginning stages where people aren't so sure of one another.

    • I agree. Cell phones are the major problem. One of my turn offs, if we're on a date and you're more in tune with your phone than with me. I doubt I'd be looking for a second date.

    • Oh, for sure. I don't mind someone checking it, but to be on it constantly is another story.

  • Overall? Not a fan.

    Some days it was great and fun. Others, it felt like work and that I was wasting my time.

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    • Yeah, I said the same thing in our conversation.

    • I have 100% faith you'll find someone. You're too awesome to be alone. ^-^ I said it so it has to be true, right?

    • Haha, yeah, go figure. This whole conversation started, not because of my friend being on dating apps, but because they want me to find someone good. xD

  • "A" for Absolutely.
    It gives One, hun, a Chance for Romance and to Nurse and Nurture Something potentially Special. xx

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  • I HATE dating so much lol. Hopefully my husband and I work out forever and ever because if not I don't think I would ever date. I almost didn't even date him, he just kept hanging around lol

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  • I'm so freaking awkward so, no. On Tuesday I was in my nursing class and I walked into a table because my crush was staring at me. He later tried to start a conversation with me but I didn't reply back. Ugh why do I do this to myself?

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    • Try to start a conversation with him sometime soon maybe? You got this!

    • Right. Yeah I've got this πŸ‘

    • Haha, I have faith in you. It's clear that he wanted to talk to you at least, so you know that much and shouldn't be worried about if he is open to speaking with you.

  • I think it depends on the type of people you end up meeting. And your intentions behind the dates. If they are just for fun, then as long as the date is not terrible it went well, if you're after commitment, even if the date was great, failing to find someone with the same goal sucks.

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  • I am sooooooooo relieved not to be dating anymore Hahaha I hated it so much

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  • I haven't dated since I don't know where to meet guys my age but I think I'd love it.

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    • Why do you think you would enjoy it? Just to be able to meet new people and experience new things?

    • because when I was around the guy I liked last semester I was always very happy being around him - he would cheer me up and make my day and I even grew spiritually from my association with him.

  • If storks were real, I wish there would be one for singles and that they would just come to our doorstep and deliver the perfect person for us. That way we could just skip all the god-awful first dates, heartbreaks and disappointing sex.

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  • I like it.

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  • I enjoy dating cause I like going out and I like meeting new people

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  • I'm actually the worst at it so I hate it πŸ˜‚ Forever alone tbh

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  • I hate it sooo...

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  • I used to love it until Tinder is introduced in dating game and everyone started acting like they're no more than a body to let reproductive systems live on.

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