How to stop falling for people so fast?

I broke up with my boyfriend a month ago and now I'm totally over it, I kind of knew at the time we weren't compatible but Whenever someone takes an interest in me I can't help myself.
I went on a date with an old friend the other night and I ended going back to his place and ended up staying there for two days! It was great we really got to know each other again. And we had the best time.
But now I'm at home alone I overthink everything and immediately fall for him. Why does this happen to me?
I do suffer with depression and it's been quite difficult recently and I know I should be really happy about meeting this new guy he wants to see me again but I just can't help but think negative about it all. He genuinely seems really interested in me but I get so invested so quickly that I think something's going to go wrong.
I just don't even really know what I'm trying to say, I'm just confused and I don't know.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You're insecure. You don't feel complete by yourself and therefore you attempt to latch onto others to fill that void. If I had to guess, I would say you aren't over your ex boyfriend. If I had to guess, I'd say that you're just in a optimistic mood as of right now but will soon fluctuate back to missing that feeling that he gave you.

    Notice how I worded that? "that feeling that he gave you" . I didn't say you missed him. He offered you emotional security and now you that you don't have him you seek it elsewhere.

    You're subconsciously opening yourself up to quickly on an emotional level due to insecurity. You can make a decision right now. You can either A... blow up on me because the truth might be offensive. You'll keep going down this path though. Or B... Actually realize what I'm saying probably has some truth in it.

    I think you need to come to terms with the fact that you are insecure and figure out why. Once you figure out why, then go ahead and fix it. Don't just hope it will get better. Don't bitch and moan about your insecurities.. just fix it. Don't use 'depression' as a safety net to say why you can't do it. We all have our own demons and you aren't a special snowflake. Like I said, just do it. Make a diligent effort. Until you do that, you will not be participating in healthy relationships.

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What Guys Said 1

  • I agree with Chico, but though depression is a tough thing to cope with, but maybe try to take a break from relationships and spend some time trying to figure out what you WANT in life and in love. and before you can love someone learn to love yourself and you will find that happiness will find its way to you :)

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