To care about girlfriend with all your heart, yet have no attraction to her?

I have been with this girl for five years and I really do care about her but I do not find her attractive anymore, this is not fully a physical thing but about her lack of a desire to live a physically healthy life. Is it healthy for me to be with her when all I do is get more attracted to woman I know who live the lifestyle I do find attractive.


Most Helpful Girl

  • you shouldn't be with someone that you aren't attracted to unless you feel like you can change it i mean its not fair on her unless you're happy this way and she knows how you feel i don't think its healthy and thinking of being with other women isn't good either sure everyone sometimes fantasises but it sounds like you care about this girl but if you look at the bigger picture you want out..

    • yes I do feel it is far to unhealthy to have these feelings of her yet I also feel that I am willing to live my life with her and live my life as an example of how to live a healthy life and then hope that she will follow in my example to live a healthy life

    • I have found that I have the strength to keep myself from going too far although just the thought of and to be flirting with other girls is becoming hurtful in my heart

Most Helpful Guy

  • It's not good for either of you if you're in a relationship and not attracted to her. Not saying you will, but it's how people end up cheating. Best to just come clean and talk to her about it. Who knows, maybe she'll change her ways? Else, you have room for friendship.

    • yes I have been feeling that it will be the best for the two of us if I did start talking about this with her, for how could I expect her to change if she dos not know how I feel

    • Show All
    • I'm glad you're feeling better about it, I wish you the best of luck with it and hope everything works out.

    • I will take this first step tomorrow with her and I hope me and her will have the strength to get through this in a healthy emotional way

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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 2

  • he honest with her up front. tell her your only interested in a mutual friendship with her.

    • thats the thing I do want it to be more I want to marry her but it scars me to hurt her through my lack of strength to keep myself faithful to her

    • I realized that I needed to be honest with myself, I was feeling scared of the commitment of marriage I know now and was telling myself it would be easier to walk away and find only moments of happiness, through fooling around with other woman, but now I realize that that would only bring me more pain than good. And so I will stay true to my lady and find ways to work things out

  • Not a good idea. I hope she doesn't hear you say that to her. It'll break her heart.

    • the truth behind this post is to get these feelings off my heart. the real truth still is that I Love her just not the way she now lives her life

    • Sounds good

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