I'm having trouble explaining this to my little sister because I didn't have the same experiences as her. she's going to be in 9th grade this year, and she sorta had a boyfriend last year. he was a year (and a grade) below her at a different school because we go to an all girls school. anyway, she doesn't really want a boyfriend because she's seen her friends try it, and it just becomes a messy complicated thing at her age. but, she likes guys and all, so she asked me if there's something she can do where she can hang with guys and her friends (like a co-ed group) w/o it becoming people gossiping that she's a slut, or that she's someone's girlfriend because last time that's what happened, everyone decided stuff for her. and I just don't know what to tell her. she pretty much asked he if there's a way to "be with a guy" w/o it being dating and girlfriend/boyfriend stuff, and I don't know if there really is a such thing...she would go out as a group because there's no way she would be able to go 1 on 1 at this point, but is there a such think as she asked? I dint want to lie to her, but now I'm wondering of there really is a way to do that


Most Helpful Guy

  • First, tell your sister this guy is proud of her.

    Ok...anything that can be done with a few friends is going to prevent most of the gossip. The mouths tend to be a bit more cautious if they might be confronted by several people.

    If she keeps it to daytime activities it will help as well.

    My oldest daughter was a master at this sort of stuff. She came up with so many ideas for things to do with her guy friends that left no room for chatter along the gossip chain. She always had one or two of her friends along, and the guys they invited knew it wasn't a date...just a day out doing something fun with the girls.

    The one I used to hear her girlfriends talk about the most were the picnics. They would bring along frisbees, or a nerf football, music, and invade one of the parks. It was public, but intimate at the same time. It was a relaxed atmosphere that allowed conversation, and it cost very little to do.


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What Girls Said 1

  • People will always talk sh*t, Always. She might as well BE with the guy she likes, because even if she finds some way to not really be with him, but still be with him. People will talk about that too.