What turns you off from a woman's dating profile?

What are your red flags, turn offs, and deal breakers.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • - Princess Syndrome (I expect to be treated like a princess, and I want a knight in shining armor to sweep me off my feet and live happily ever after"). That's bad enough for a teen, but women in their 30s and 40s have profiles like that.

    - vegan, kale, hemp, Wheatgrass, crystals, weed, smoking, drugs, or excessive drinking (50 pictures, holding a drink in every one).

    - "My kids come first." Which means I have to be okay coming last - but if she isn't my first priority, and I'm not available on her schedule, then I am not serious enough for her. No thanks.

    - Has to be okay with my mental illness (which I refuse treatment for), my chronic condition which prevents me from doing anything but watch TV, and the fact that I still financially support my ex.

    - I have 2 masters degrees and was in college for 12 years, but I can't find work in my field (French Literature and Art Appreciation) so I work at Starbucks. I'd like to move in with you, but I can't pay much because of my $450,000 in student loans. Who knew you had to pay those back?

    - I'm not interested in sex - I expect a man to love me for me. And of course I demand monogamy, and porn is totally unacceptable.

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    • I was going to write in my opinion but there's nothing that I could say that this post doesn't state and then more accurately explain.

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    • Corey Wayne hits on this pretty well. So does doc love.

    • Just a food for thought about disgusting female behavior described throughout this entire take and comments.

      Are women REALLY happier now than they were 30, 40 or even 50 years ago? I mean we've progressed (in some ways too far) on issues like sexual assault, workplace sexism, etc. But really in general... is this behavior really making most women content and happy? I bet a hundred bucks no

Most Helpful Girl

  • For men:

    Guys with shirtless pics with their abs showing. 10/10 times they're a fuckboy

    Guys who fish (nothing wrong with fishing, just not my thing)

    Backwards cap (def gonna be too immature for me)

    Stuff in their bio that whines about women never choosing them.

    No job - HUGE RED FLAG. RUN AWAY

    Cringey fedora guys who talk about wanting to shower a girl with affection/presents etc

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    • totally agree on the shirtless part like who falls for that shit.

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    • I agree that the guys with the shirtless pics are usually turn offs maybe not if he's standing 20 feet into the ocean.
      Also, laying in bed and standing in the bathroom. πŸ‘ŽπŸΌ

    • Haha agree. On point!

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 358

  • - Being overweight yet wanting 'toned and athletic' men.
    - Giving too many credentials about your job, salary, degree, and where you went to college.
    - Boring hobbies like rock climbing, dog walking, etc.
    - Trying to tell me how to message you yet still not replying even when I message you exactly how you pointed out.

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    • What is an exciting hobby to you?

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    • @Sheriblossom I comprehend but I disagree

  • Any picture of a woman with the Eiffel Tower in the background is a warning sign!

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    • true dat

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    • @lMike Paris, France! You got it!

    • Majority of girls want to be take traveling (at least in my country) so it don't say much for us.

  • One thing I personally hate (and don't understand why) is women that post pictures of them in groups, and don't specify who they are in the picture and/or don't post any of just them. Almost all women do it to I've noticed. Other than that, just any details that are something I'm not looking for or wanting, eg. uses drugs is a deal breaker for sure. Some turn offs are if they drink A LOT, like everyday. Smoking. Lots of tattoos. Just off the top of my head. A lot of women don't go into a lot of detail in their profiles either and/or are very vague. They often complain about guys profiles when theirs are just as bad if not worse!! lol

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  • not necessarily deal breakers unless i see a lot of them in one profile. but things that raise red flags
    - lots of photos with glammed up shots (lots of makeup, lots of poses and staged shots and that type of stuff). it makes me question if they are perhaps superficial or afraid of jsut letting people see them in more natural scenarios
    - lots of photos with guys draped around them
    - lots of photos in bars, clubs, drinking etc
    - descriptions that seem superficial, materialistic, etc
    - seem really unmotivated

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  • The thing I dislike most is when every picture is a selfie. Especially if it's just their face. Do we need to guess what the rest of you looks like? I also dislike the duck face and those Snapchat photos. It's ok to smile once or twice. If a couple are Snapchat that's fine although I do think they're ridiculous. I don't want to see you with animals noses or ears. Plus filtered eyes. One other picture problem is when every picture has a group of girls. Do we need to guess which one you are?

    I don't like when they write nothing about themselves. Some women are beautiful and think they can win over any guy by their looks. For me I'd like to know about the type of girl you are. Even if it's just a little. Two more things I dislike are when a girl tells guys they'd be lucky to have her or want to be spoiled.
    That all turns me off.

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  • β€” Posting their Snapchat name. I immediately click back when I see this.
    β€” Pictures with another man (even if he's "just a friend")
    β€” Photos that have been photoshopped, run through a filter (e. g. sepia), or clearly taken with SnapChat.
    β€” Photos of you in a bar or consuming alcohol.
    β€” Stating something along the lines of "I'm not here for a bootie call". I don't know. It just makes me distrust you.
    β€” If I get to see your Facebook and you have more than 250 friends, I'm out.
    β€” Listing a bunch of uncompromisable requirements (e. g. "don't message me if you don't have tats")
    β€” Saying "my kids come first". Of course they fucking do. You'd be an aweful shitty mother if they didn't. What it tells me though, is you will never love me.
    β€” Saying shit like "don't bother messaging me if all you're going to say is hello". You aren't a princess, you don't need to be swooned over. You don't deserve a Shakespearean love poem from every man that messages you... and I gaurantee you that those who give you that you don't message

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  • If she parties a lot, if she is dating a guy (my question is, why are you on a dating app), if she says something on her profile like "do not message me!" or "not interested in hookups". If a girl says that on a dating profile or some type of site that allows you to meet up with other people then that's just stupid and extremely closed off.

    When I think of "hook-up" it doesn't represent sex, to me it means, hey let's go out, have a nice dinner, watch a movie and we go home and call it a night and talk later.

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  • Many (not all) do one of the following:
    1) What I find most humorous is that women will write all the things
    I need to be... lol.
    for example: " You are wealthy, well hung, and look like. You pay for everything, buy me whatever I want. You are 6' plus, blonde, blue eyed, yada yada..."
    If a guy tried that stuff he would never get a reply..
    .
    2) they don't put anything in the profile. THey will put "in progress" or just "ask me". So they turn the site into Tinder and it becomes just about looks. The men that are serious about finding a woman look at the profile to see 1) how bitchy does she sound and 2) do we have anything in common.
    .
    3) they don't put a location. For some reason a lot of women think that if they put the city they live in that the guy is just going to show up at their door. We can't find you house from just the city. I was in a long distance relationship. She lived about 40 miles away. It would take 45 min to 1 hour to get to her house since I had to go through Detroit to get to her city and the traffic sucks. I will not date anyone that is that far away anymore. So if the woman doesn't put her city, I don't bother to read the profile.
    .
    4) The worst thing they do is : THEY DON'T SEND OUT MESSAGES FIRST. I know that online dating sucks worse for women. You get bombarded with messages from guys about sex. What would be the best thing to do about that? send messages to guys you want to hear from. Then you know to read them and that they are legit. I can usually have a date within a week if I send messages to women first. But for the last year I have taken a break from dating. But since I really really want a woman to come after me the way I am expected to go after them, I left my profile active and would have responded to anyone that sent me a message. I got eactly 4 in a year. 2 were from women that send messages to every guy on the site and I have already dealt with in the past. The other 2 only 1 was interesting. And I did go on a date with her. WTF? that is the most frustrating part of online dating. And several women I have dated straight up said "No way I am sending out messages first". I just want to pull out what hair I have left.

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    • Almost forgot... No pictures or pictures with a group of women and nothing to say which she is. Don't put group pictures

  • 1. You don't respond at all, it seems like. What's with the like button then? People do get the messages, depending on what site your on.
    2. Respond after the second message... Do you really think I care about meeting you, or even would like to talk to you still? I took the time, to read your profile, as most want. Then you respond now? Hope your not late for the date too? Maybe I can? Then you can pay too :)
    3. Overly sexually pictures? Really, most of you don't like shirts off? Get real too now, k?
    4. The very First picture of nothing, your pets, sunsets, or your male buddy. Really? Are you sure your not taken?
    5. Fake profiles... I've come across one person, she told me, everything on her profile wasn't true... Get real people, and tell me the truth, to see who you really are :) Most of you woman want us to read your profile right? I'd like to know I'm reading, is true :)

    6. Too much makeup. I'd rather see none at all. Would be nice to see one real photo :)
    7.

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  • I only tried online dating once and flirted around only. I got around 1/8 response rate per message sent. I looked at it like a project and tried many different tactics.

    There's some crazy people on there is what I took away. I never met anyone from there. I prefer human interaction where I'm at an advantage. I read somewhere guys are outnumbered as bad as 10-1 on online dating.

    A ton of girls are just on there to flirt around/validation farm. I came to the conclusion it's a dating version of an insane asylum for people socially challenged.

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    • I went off on a tangent and forgot to add turnoffs. When all pics with friends, only face pics, negativity on profile, my kids comes first (which is cool in itself, just comes off sounding like you would come last).

  • The following for me:

    "I have my own car (which I paid off), my own house, an 800 credit score, a college education and a lucrative job"

    Why that annoys me:
    I hate when women list their accomplishments. Just because you have all that shit, doesn't make you a suitable match. Most women I have talked to who make lists like that have a stuck up personality and say 1-2 words when you talk to them. They are obsessed with goals/things and not obsessed with personality.

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    Women who say, "I'm a lot to handle"

    Why that annoys me?
    If you're a lot to handle, why should I even waste my time talking to you? I don't want a woman that's hard to handle. Men don't want a woman that's hard to handle. If you're a lot to handle, I will find a woman who is easier to get along with and doesn't have drama attached to her.

    ______________________

    Women who show party pics or provocative pics

    Why that annoys me?
    I've talked to women who post that stuff. They will either:
    A. Ignore you if you talk to them (but they matched you as well)
    B. Will rant and complain that their are no good men out there and that most men are lame.

    I've tried to talk to women like that. They are superficial as fuck. They think that because they have a lot of men after them, they have a golden pussy. Good luck finding a good man.

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  • "Must love dogs," "I'm as real as it gets," "you better have a high paying job," "not looking for a one night stand" (if she has to spell it out, she's probably had a few), duck face photos, won't supply any religious or political belief information, has more than one child, especially from different fathers, smoker flaunts tattoos, etc.

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  • if she says 'not interested in hookups'. Like, I assume all girls are not interested in hookups, but if they actually feel compelled to say so, I assume they aren't interested in sex at all.

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  • to every guy out there, it's always entitled bitches lol.

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  • When they tell you what they dont like or do and do it anyway.

    I dont share nudes. But it took her 3 days to show her tits or ass on cam.

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  • Negativity -- a profile that says what she doesn't want. This is a sign that she had poor judgment and is generally unhappy. The rest is all personal preference. Things that are deal-breakers for me (like religion) that may be deal-makers for someone else.

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  • If she has too many pictures of her partying than anything else, that's a huge turn off for me. You can't say you wanna settle down & have a family or want a good long lasting relationship with a man that'll treat you good while your pictures say a different story. Most people only hit you up based on what they see in the pictures, not read the rest of the profile. But some do both, read what you wrote & see your pics.

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  • Not putting up full body pics, us men are visual and we need to see a head-to-toe pic.

    Writing a boring profile, or even worse, not even writing one! Tell us about you, put your personality into your writing! Let us get to know who you are. So many girls write in such a generic fashion, that I can't tell the girls apart besides their username.

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  • I dislike it when a girl says that she's not into one night stands and wants something serious while her pictures tell a COMPLETELY different story.

    I also heavily dislike it when girls act hard to get and also assume that all guys are the same (sending dick pics, talking dirty, etc).

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  • 1). I'm not racist, but I don't date outside my race. I see this nonsense all the time and it makes me want to throw a dictionary at them.

    2). Mentioning Jesus or god several times in a single paragraph. as an atheist this is just a clear indicator this woman isn't going to like me.

    3). mentioning recreational activities anyone with a pulse could enjoy. too easy.

    4). friends first. is this kindergarten? pen pal club? do women not realize how insulting it is to assume men have to be coerced into understanding this?

    5). any mention of chivalry. chivalry may sound quaint but it is actually a byproduct of a way of thinking that no longer exists.

    ... just off the top of my head :-P

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  • My favorite is the profile photo which has been cropped out of a larger picture, and you can still see the hairy arm of her ex boyfriend around her shoulder XDDD

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  • When they don't say anything at all about themselves in their bio and just have images.

    It's not that difficult to say 2-3 interesting things about yourself that would make me want to get to know you.

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  • Only "dating site" i've used before was Tinder, so grain of salt.

    Anything that suggests she may be emotionally damaged and or unstable. Any indicators she may have daddy issues, hardcore distrust of men, or things that suggests she has an absurdly high standard because she feels she should be treated as an empress when she's not even been able to keep a man. Most times when a girls base assumption is that every man should treat her like a "Queen" it's a good idea to just walk the other way.

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    • Unfortunately, too many women out there think that they have to be treated as a queen merely by virtue of having a vagina

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    • @Hemlock

      Women are amazing. But in my experience women who have this expectation tend to not be deserving of that treatment.

  • snapchat animal filters... looks childish

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  • Iv only used one but some reasons would be has kids, is transexul , asexual, noticeably more overweight than their initial photo implied ,
    I think im not good enough for them because i'm less successful, low match , they say on their profile they have a boyfriend I also find this one annoying since there basicly knowingly cluttering things up for us single pepole to have more unsuitable profiles to go through.
    They expect the world and i'd much rather be single than deal with spoiled or entitled.

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  • Here's my dating profile dissection: www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a34115-your-dating-profile-dissected-or-what-not-to-write-about-yourself

    Dating profiles never say what they'll DO for the other - it's always totally inwardly focused and overblown beyond belief.

    For some reason some women think that if they are more like men then men will like them better. You know, they're into sports, they have a lot of guy friends, they ride a motorcycle, or some other such manly activities. No, that's not what men are looking for - they don't need another guy buddy, they're looking for a feminine woman.

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  • ladies with openly flaunt their mental issues,
    ladies who are not over their exes,
    ladies who are angry feminists,
    etc etc

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  • If your a liar my only big turn off. Like do not say you outgoing when you really on reserve, do not say your kind as a muffin an be a real b$%^$ if you are mean if you are nice own that take accountability for who you are. Regardless of what is said.

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  • Words or phrases that indicate gold digger status. I grew up poor and that have me more character than these guys born with a silver spoon.

    Also, anything that indicates your super Christian. Uh nope.

    A profile that shows you are a laguna beach airhead is eye opening.

    Pics of your tits without a full body shot is clear you are fat.

    But we are guys. We just look at pics. Have some pics without other guys that show you have a clue. No old grainy photos. No comments about how you can be bitchy.

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  • "I want that" and "I want this", "I will probably ignore you but i may consider you based solely on your looks". and most important of all "send Hi and I will ignore you" what the hell do we want to say other than Hi? do I need to say. "wanna fuck" or something to turn you on? that is bull craptastic shit.

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  • More from Guys
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What Girls Said 23

  • Her gender.

    I'm only into men.

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  • When I was online dating, I actually created a phony male profile first to peruse the women's profiles to see what I was up against. I tell you it was not too hard to stand out.

    Just about every woman out there had the same boring, predictable, unrealistic profile complete with a duckfacing photos - most of which were the same exact pose from their webcam just taken wearing different garments.

    I wanted to make sure I was *not* like those other women, and learned from their mistakes and made something fun and honest. In fact, I actually stated a few of my flaws such as snoring, irritability towards kids, and having no athleticism whatsoever. I couldn't believe the hits I was getting from men everywhere. Many of whom told me my profile was like a breath of fresh air. I had a normal picture with a normal smile (no selfie), and just made the information very basic. My last line about the ideal first date was for the guy to meet my parents, then go for a pizza and have sex in the car. Kidding of course, but they loved the humour too.

    I think women tend to make themselves vamped up, as if no other woman can do that with a webcam selfie, and out of frustration, inform the men what their dealbreakers are and what they won't put up with. I think a lot of men get tired of the dead ends and phony pictures and just want a real woman.

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  • From what my brother has told me:

    Group photos where you don't know which person she is.

    Not having enough information about her life, interests, and hobbies.

    Saying she has kids or wants to have kids (he's child free by choice).

    Saying she wants an open relationship, swinging, or looking for group sex.

    Vegetarian or vegan.

    Smoking, drinking, using drugs. He doesn't drink or smoke.

    Pictures that show she's a partier.

    There's probably way more.

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  • her penis

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  • I don't use dating apps but in my opinion when someone's trying too hard to look sexy would be a turn off for a lot of people

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  • When they have 10 pictures of them showing off their abs.. like get over yourself

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    • You know how hard getting abs is right?

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    • @milantb1 nah it's not my type

    • dont think so

  • For me, it's guys who have minimal info in their profiles (or none). Also, shirtless pics, or pics with other women. And guys who take pictures of themselves at the gym and talk about how much they can bench, etc. So, basically anything superficial.

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    • No full or semi height pictures is a yellow flag to me as it may signify that the girl is hiding her size..

      If a girl post lots of almost naked pictures or lots of insinuating pictures then I will not invest much effort intellectually.
      In other words, if you are selling yourself through your body don't expect my brain.

      No smile in any picture males me think the person is not in a healthy state of mind. what state of mind they are in could be lots of things. Not worth the risk in my opinion.

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    • that's interesting. I only put selfies but never to hide my height haha I'm 5'2", can't be scared of that

    • Its more often to hide horizontal size :).

      Sadly I have had a few encounters of girls who had only selfies of their face taken at an angle to give a slim/normal bodytype impression.

  • Holy moly after reading the answers I see that I don't have any chance.
    Not a tiny single chance to meet anyone online

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  • On a dating profile it will be group picture where you guess witch guy it is

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  • - group pictures. Especially if one of them is not cute. (Usually its him)
    - unclear pictures
    - pictures with alcohol / drugs
    - too many club pics

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  • duck selfies.

    selfies.

    selfies.

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  • I would say over sexual pictures, sends the wrong message and attracts the attention from men

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  • Um makeup and 30,000 selfies of herself only

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    • God yes. Especially if they are all taken on a shit laptop computer at odd angles where it's obvious she's looking down at the camera from her bed, and that all the pictures were taken within the same 25 minutes.

      Why not exert minimum effort, go outside, frame a not terrible background, set the timer and smile?

  • Fake profile & Fake Snaps are big "turn offs".

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  • Men who have been on a gap year travelling and taken pictures with a drugged tiger πŸ‘Ž

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  • This is epic. Great points here!

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  • All of her cats.

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    • Not quite true. She will have ONE kitty that we will be very fond of...

  • Sei bellissima πŸ’‹

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  • Not being natural.

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  • any woman that is desperate enough to pay the man's way isn't ltr material and will just be used

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  • "if... swipe left"
    And pics on which they're trying too hard to look good/sexy and ones with too much make up on. On guys profiles I don't like half naked pics.

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  • either dressed too slutty, or forcibly modest (when yo know she's deep doown a lut faking modesty)... .

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    • the girl in the picture shows too much cleavage and is all around a try-hard. rejected.

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    • @somewheresomeway the signs were all there dude. it was you that couldnt see. because of lust for her probably. none of these friends of mine married such a girl. if they can detect truly fine women from the first few dates, and dont get scammed, and you do, its you that do something wrong.

    • @Darknut123 exactly. This stupid ass 3rd feminism is wants men to "respect" them and at the same time have no judgement for how they dress (or even if they wear clothes at all).

      They can scream their twisted views all day long but you will never be able to manipulate male hormones and sex drive. Those are biological. They are what they are.

  • Slutty pictures

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