Why do guys reject me as soon as they learn that I'm a feminist?


0|0
1146

Most Helpful Guy

  • Because the feminist crowd has a reputation for being surly ball busters.

    1|1
    0|0

Most Helpful Girl

  • Your actions speak louder than words. Being a "feminist" these days is such a negative thing to declare, even if you are simply a woman who loves men and just wants to preserve the rights of women.

    There are a lot of things you don't need to discuss immediately about yourself in the first few stages of dating that have tendencies to be offputting to many men. To a lot of men, saying you're a feminist is up there with other things they don't really need to know such as telling them you like being peed on, saying that you were gang-raped in college. If it just doesn't need to be said, don't say it. A guy will figure out first if he likes you enough and will get to know the things that are near and dear to your heart as far as what you advocate for. Once he gets to know the sweet and wonderful you, if you eventually tell him that it means a lot to attend a yearly women's group that petitions women's rights in Afghanistan, then fine. He will find out soon enough that you are all about equality without having to put fear in to him that you are against men.

    For example, when I was dating, I put my atheism on the back-burner. I didn't want to reveal something that sounded negative if someone didn't understand what it was. Eventually the guy got to like me and then learned "oh she doesn't believe in god" but by then it didn't really matter, and then I could simply explain my views so it wasn't so in-your-face, something they needed to know about me immediately. It gives the impression that all other things don't mean as much to you. A guy wants to be the focus when you meet him, so to talk about him and ask him questions and be friendly with him will eventually make him see that being feminist doesn't define who you are as a person, but it is just a part of what's important to you as far as what issues mean most to you.

    2|4
    0|0

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 45

  • No one wants to be around someone that's unpleasant to be around and hates them just for existing.

    And hatepigs are EXTREMELY unpleasant to be around, and hate men.

    3|7
    0|0
  • Because there's more than one kind of feminist... and some feminists are just plain jerks... (I'd like to use a stronger term but it wouldn't help in any way). You have feminists who want to empower and support women; the ones who want women to have equal rights to those of men. Then you have the kind who think all men are automatically misogynistic, and hate women, that we're all just going to take advantage of women and anything we do is for the sole purpose of hurting or somehow objectifying women.

    Basically... it's not so much an issue with what you believe. The issue is that many people claim to be "feminists" and they don't all mean the same thing, and the negative associations a lot of people have with feminism are just well founded enough to make them want to avoid anyone who claims to be a feminist.

    2|2
    0|4
  • Because they're stupid.
    They live by bias, preconceived notions, and cognitive dissonance... all fed to them by social construct... This means that if 50 people say something them, they will believe it without any facts, if they gets facts they will either ignore it or fine facts to fit their point, and they might not even realize how dumb they are.
    And by stupid I meant.

    Definition of stupid
    1
    a : slow of mind : obtuse
    b : given to unintelligent decisions or acts : acting in an unintelligent or careless manner
    c : lacking intelligence or reason :

    0|1
    1|0
  • Third wave feminism is synonymous with misandry. Egalitarianism is true equality, so if you truly believe in equality without any biases then say you are a egalitarian.

    0|6
    0|0
  • They're doing the right thing.

    0|11
    3|0
  • Why?
    Because Feminism is a Marxist ideology that is at odds with science, history and the rest of reality.
    Because Feminists are the most hateful and toxic people whom I have encountered.
    "Feminism, is cancer." - Milo

    2|3
    0|0
  • Here I find myself reading the comments and then this question pops up in my head :

    How the f did they even learn that you're a feminist to begin with?
    I have nothing against the ideology of wanting everyone to be as close as equal, but surely you're not bragging about it?

    1|0
    0|0
  • Feminists claim they care about both genders' rights.

    Yet many men observe that they only tend to fight for women's rights even tho in some areas women actually do have more rights. Men aren't allowed to defend themselves by hitting women, while women are. Women constantly win divorce cases.

    1|3
    0|0
  • Depends on how you act and what feminism means to you. If you're man-hating and patronizing constantly, then that's obviously not good.

    1|1
    0|0
  • Because they think of a woman who won't take his last name in marriage, will want to be the dominant one in the relationship, and will not be as kind and nurturing to his future children.

    2|1
    0|0
  • To most men, we accept that women are equal. When confronted by someone who is a feminist, we immediately think that we are just going to be berated for our gender. No one wants to live on the defensive.

    Find a good SJW dude to date.

    1|4
    0|0
  • Are you really asking why? its obvious. Feminists are batches and we hate them. Maybe find a lesbian or a weak male

    1|3
    1|0
  • There's a lot of negative publicity associated with the extremists of feminism. Perhaps say instead if the topic comes up, I am an advocate for women's equality because I believe all people should be treated equally.

    0|0
    0|0
  • If you mention it in the first 5 minutes of meeting them I can see how it would put them off.

    0|4
    0|0
  • feminists are bonkers that's why

    0|4
    1|0
  • Because feminists suck? Even most women don't like feminists.

    0|4
    1|0
  • cuz most feminist hate men

    1|4
    0|0
  • The most widely shown form of feminism in the media and internet is violent and ungraceful as opposed to the previous generations of feminism fighting for equal rights, like suffrage.

    Basically they have a preconceived notion that any feminist is going to be the over the top male hating ones.

    0|2
    0|0
  • Because you're a bunch of nutcases, third wave that is

    0|5
    2|0
  • It depends on what kind of feminist you are.

    1|0
    0|1
  • why would they NOT reject you as soon as they find out you're a feminist?

    0|3
    1|0
  • Not even so called feminists can agree on what they're about even among themselves

    1|2
    0|0
    • Indicative of failing leadership that is more interested in turning profits than the movement.

  • Maybe you need to ask guys if they're a Democrat or Republican before you reveal that you're a feminist. If he's a Democrat, either it won't bother him, or he'll be all for it. If he's a Republican, good luck.

    0|2
    0|4
  • its nothing personal
    i just do my best to stay away from feminism, feminists, sjws, alt rights, nazzis, blm, antifas... whatever
    if i can fully avoid them i will.

    0|1
    0|0
  • You believe in equality?

    0|1
    1|0
  • ben you want to be equal or better than men, but when we tell you to sign up for the draft, you don't want to. can't have it both ways.

    0|0
    1|0
  • ... That's because you are a feminist

    0|1
    0|0
  • Pretty much, yeah.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I think it depends on HOW you are a feminist. Some feminists out there has ruined the reputation, so people think feminism is about believing the women are the superior sex.

    0|1
    0|0
  • More from Guys
    15

What Girls Said 10

  • Because feminist don't like men. They have the I can do anything on my own attitude. You can't expect a guy to feel less of a man because you want to feel superior. You can't have it both ways.

    2|9
    0|0
  • Cause they don't... like feminists? Lol A lot men translate the word feminist to "man hater" these days cause of what they constantly see on YouTube, news or hear by other men. The problem is a lot of people don't know the difference between the crazy 3rd wave and the first wave feminist. First wave was just women wanting to be able work along side men. They still wanted to be treated as woman though with love and respect. Well the 3rd wave has shitted all over that, they have forgotten equality but now strive to just get rid of men all together. So when men hear "feminist"= "wants to take my rights and my balls away." Can't really blame them cause they those kind are out there, and those kind are a lot of feminist. Now yes some reject you just to get back at feminism and to feel in control, yes there are still men who want want women to go back working only in the kitchen and to have dominance but most men just don't want to get caught up in the drama that comes with 3rd wave feminist. Also a lot men feel like these women are saying are needed and that can make a person feel unloved and unwanted. They don't want a woman who might end up yelling "misogynist sexist" if he so much breaths the wrong way. My advice is show them that your not that type of feminist, let them get to know you better than you express your political beliefs to them.

    1|2
    1|2
    • mostly agreeable, but the whole definition of Feminism is an oxymoron.

    • Show All
    • @cth96190 and those are the kind I was referring, the ones who are no longer about equality and just want to destroy men... did you not read what I said lol those feminist are awful and crazy. It's the reason I'm not one.

    • @BrittBratt2416
      I did read what you wrote.
      My position is that there were and are no 'good' Feminists.
      Feminism was created by Marxists as part of a multi-faceted plan to destroy Western Civilisation by destroying the family.
      The first two stages of Feminism were necessary to set the stage for the third phase, which was and is a direct attack on men and the family, by destroying gender relations.
      Thus, all Feminism is cancer and Feminists are either Marxists, or their useful idiots (to borrow Lenin's description of his followers).

  • Because feminists usually are very stronlgy opinionated and are very critical to men oops

    2|3
    1|2
  • Because the current feminist wave is cancerous. They hate men.

    3|7
    0|0
  • Because they're smart.

    2|4
    0|0
  • Have you not seen how feminists act?

    2|5
    0|0
  • Feminism has a highly negative connotation in today's society, which is sad because most guys don't even know what feminism truly is

    2|1
    3|12
    • Try me...

    • Show All
    • @cth96190

      Thank you for going into all the detail that I don't have the patience to list.

    • I liked you :(

  • It's about time to educate some people. The term feminism is defined as, 'the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes' meaning the belief that both genders should be treated equally in all aspects of life. These 'feminists' on the media lately are NOT true feminists, they're quite literally the opposite and shouldn't be named as feminists as it gives the name a bad prerequisite. As for your question, I can see why someone wouldn't particularly like it if you randomly brought it up in the first five minutes of meeting them, but otherwise if it just comes up in a casual conversation and they react the same way, they're just straight generalising and need to be educated/need their eyes opened.

    Just to clarify, I'm not attempting to start anything, I'm merely stating facts where no one seems to know them.

    1|0
    3|5
  • Because they don't want you to make your own choices.

    0|0
    1|1
  • Because modern day feminism is like herpes. Like you might not turn out to be one of those feminists people need to stay away from but then again you might turn out to be a crazy feminist, how would he know until he spends way too much time and effort on you. Better to just save himself the headache, quit while he's ahead, and to just not deal with you at all. If you think it's unfair - just remember. The blame isn't only on him, it's on your fellow feminists, the crazy ones, that ruined the whole movement for all of you.

    1|6
    0|0
Loading...