I'm going on a first date with this guy I think we're going to meet up at a coffee shop, I want to pay for my coffee. Should I? Or should I let him pay for it if he offers? I
Is it okay if I pay for myself on a first date?
What Guys Said 46
If I asked a woman out and she demanded to pay for herself, I would be hurt and offended. That means she really had no desire to go on a date with me.
Whoever asked for the date should pay the 1st time. Then the other person should pay the next time. Or he pays for the first part of the date and then if you go to a 2nd location, you pay there.2
If you're looking for a conservative guy, that's not a smart decision. But if you're looking for a partner that sees your ass an equal, you should do it.2
Since you like him and want to pay your own, just pay your own but still show him that you are still interested in him during and after the date. Otherwise, he may think you are not interested in him, which means little to no chance of a second date. Or let him pay if he offers/insists.
A girl once paid her own for a movie ticket and it was clear she wasn't interested before, during, and after our date.1
It's just coffee. You can suggest to pay for yours but just let him pay if he insists in my opinion.2
It would be really polite and considerate to offer to pay for yours. But then if he asked you for the date he should go: "No, really, I insist." (Meaning he wants to pay for you both.) Then, if you guys keep seeing each other you can both help out on dates without feeling the need to keep perfect score.0
I had a date once where the girl refused to let me pay for her coffee. Very attractive, we ended up together for nearly 3 years.2
I would say if he offers to pay go for it, If your more comfortable paying for your own coffee than do so but i think any guy should least offer to pay for a girls coffee.1
personally if I was on a date and the girl wanted to pay for herself even after I had offered to, I would let her, because it shows you can be self supportive and won't take him for granted.3
There exists buddies gals & guys that "go Dutch" of course
but dating is not that.
The gal pays later if
> she insists on an outing out of his range and he complies ahead of time
> they are almost married types and want a life memory only joint funds can support
> emergencies of course (this does not include "forgot my wallet")
Just buy yours when you get there then proceed to make your way to the table1
I think that's really considerate and it says good things about your character. Especially on the first date it'll make a great impression. However if he insists on paying please let him or it might make him feel bad.1
I don't know. When I invite a girl I like, I make sure I will be the one to pay and even if you insist that you want to pay for yourself, I would still offer to pay for you.2
me being a real gentleman I would pay before you knew it and honestly I wouldn't have a issue with it show your Independence2
if you want to but he'll probably do it anyway2
I would say ordering separately would be best if you have the means to pay for what you are planning to get. That would save you from assuming you owe him something. 👌1
if money doesn't matter 2 u then offer to pay for both cups... and if he doesn't matter to u then bring up this convo...
lastly... if he matters to u then i guess a lot of coffee mugs will b around... and who pays won't matter ny more... enjoy the date... atb!0
50/50 but if he insists then don't1
Either way is good. Just don't make it an issue.2
Presume he will pay. And if he doesn't, then move on to the next guy.
A guy paying for a date is a sign of respect and financial stability (coffee isn't much, but a house and kids are).0
if he's a gentlemen then he'll pay. but that doesn't always mean he has too. it all depends. me i see girls take advantage of it but i also see guys insist on it until they let him3
Absolutely, who says you can't, especially if you want to and have the means.1
If I invited you on a date I'll pay and if you only try to pay for yourself, I'll hold you in a head lock while the waiter swipes my card.0
I think its only normal if you do1
honestly it would be wrong for you to pay for it on a first date, let him pay for it1
He better pay.2
Gee, I can see this is going to go well. :(0
Either way. If he insists on paying then let him.0
Yeah, I would be glad if the girl payed1
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What Girls Said 11
I think its smarter to pay for yourself3
I think, if you want to of course, you could try and convince him to pay for yourself. If he insists just let him pay. It will be sure that he wanted to do this gesture and wasn't forced to because of stereotypes1
There's no problem in you paying for your own stuff. It means your independent and not afraid of being your own woman. Don't get me wrong, I'm not bad mouthing the women who let men pay, go all for it, I'm just saying you don't have to live by the old time rules where men should pay.2
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If he offers, politely deny, but he will pay for it anyway1
Do what makes you feel comfortable. If you really want to buy it, just do it. If he offers, you can let him, or insist that you do. If you do let him buy it, maybe offer to buy next time or whatever.2
Personally, I think that it's more than okay.
My man literally forgot his wallet on the first date, and I could sense that he was being genuine. He says it worked out well because we were talking about equality, and it just gave him an excuse to see me again to take care of it for sure next time.1
You can pay and he'll most likely stop you and offer to pay it himself. You should just say no the first time and be like it's okay I'll pay but if he insists just let him1
No there is nothing wrong with that =)1
Whatever you want. I personally like to pay for myself no matter what date I', m on. But sometimes I'm willing to make a compromise (I buy dinner, he buys movie). Honestly it's been a while since I've been on a date though.2
It's okay! But if he seems really eager, like he'll feel bad if he doesn't pay, let him.0
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