Bad experience?

It's like whenever I try to ask girls out something always gets in the way, they come up with sh*t excuses.

I mean, if they were really interested they would actually manage to sacrifice some time just to go out with you right?

Before you call me impatient or a needy loser, I've asked girls out in the past, and whenever they give me that "my schedule is packed" crap excuse, 4 out of 5 times they were never busy to begin with.


Most Helpful Guy

  • If your a shy dude, girls can sense the insecurity. You need to be full of confidence when you ask a girl out on a date. That doesn't mean you need to be cocky, just make her feel like you would really like to spend some time with her. Have a backup plan. If she says she's not available on a certain day or time, say "how about Saturday instead?" Or, "Oh, you're busy for a late movie, how about catching a matinee?" You've got to make it happen and be prepared for her to say "no." If she does just shoot you down, come back with, "OK, maybe another time then?" If it's still a NO, then move on to someone else. if it's a YES or OK, then walk away and try again another day.

    If it's a girl you like, and you're just not getting anywhere with her, try this. I know it might sound a little cruel, or disingenuous, but it works . . .sometimes. Use this only if you're willing to accept that it may be your last shot with her, because this will either peak her interest, or shut you out completely. And it takes some confidence to pull off.

    So, what you do is this. Let's say you've done everything you can to ask her out. You've asked her a few times, but you're just not getting anywhere. When she says that final "no," just say "OK, (pause for affect) hey, do you know if (insert one of her friends names here) is busy on Saturday? If she doesn't immediately get p*ssed and walk away, you've got a chance. So, if she gives you an answer (as long as it isn't f*** off) immediately follow up by asking for her friends number. If you get it great, if not, don't worry about it.

    Now here's the tricky part, you have to try and get a date with the friend. If you get the date, go on it and have good time. If the friend turns you down, don't worry about it, just move on to the next part. If you're still interested in the first girl, ask her out again. This time, tell her you had a nice time with her friend, but you'd really like to go out with her instead. Now, what ever you do, don't go into any detail about the date with the friend. Just be vague and tell her that you'd rather talk about her. if you didn't get the date with the friend, just play it off like it's no big deal.

    Now, if she still won't go out with you, it's pretty much done. But, since you've already asked for her friends number once, you might as well ask for another one again. But ask differently this time. Ask her who she thinks you should ask out. It would be interesting to hear what she has to say. What the heck, you might as well try to get another date out of it, right?

    I'm sure there will be those that disagree with this method, but it works.

    • Thing is man she really sounds interested, but apparently she's starting college in a week. when I post stuff on FB, she occasionally makes remarks that doesn't help to dispel the idea that she's interested. I suppose she really is busy. but I don't want her to forget that I asked her out or go for another guy in her new college.

    • Well, you've got a problem then. Is the college local, or is she moving away to live on campus? If she's living on campus, how far away will she be? There's no doubt that she's busy. She's got a lot of things to take care of before next week. Since you guys aren't dating, she has no obligation to you. Unless there's something wrong with her, or she's just completely devoted to studying, she WILL date other dudes at school.

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What Girls Said 1

  • some people just aren't interested. Its easier than saying sorry your not really my type or something like that, its a girl trying to turn you down in a nice way, then they don't have to risk you becoming mad or resentful, etc. but even when I'm really interested in someone certain things such as my family and study will come first, so in that case she may be interested but at the time you werent her top priority. or sometimes in general, dating isn't a top priority for many people.

    • Problem is she sounds interested, so what should I do now?

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    • Hmmm what I normally do then is to make small talk with the girls, with varying results. I sent the girl a text before coming here, so I should ignore her reply yeh?

    • Depends. if she asks you a question, reply, but make it very concise. like one or two words. if its not a question, don't reply, and just wait til she texts you.

What Guys Said 1

  • try befriending them first instead of coming off as a potential mate