When it comes to online dating, which do you value more, looks or substance?

When it comes to Online Dating, which do you value more, LOOKS or SUBSTANCE?
We all know we would like to have both but if you had to choose between looks and substance which one would it be? I have seen a lot of profiles in my day where the person's looks were outstanding but when you get to the profile it is riddled with spelling and grammar errors. Sometimes they don't even make sense in what they are trying to say. So... do you consider that or just go off looks? Let us know below!

  • I am all about the looks
    Vote A
  • They got to have some substance or it's a deal breaker
    Vote B
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'd rather date an ok looking guy with substance than a good looking one who's completely unintelligent. And it doesn't really matter if it's online or not - my standards remain the same.
    That being said, I would never date someone I wasn't attracted to both physically and mentally.

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    • Most guys think you women just pick the good looking dummys and that is why they don't bother dating LOL.

    • That's their problem honestly. And I think making that assumption is pretty shallow in and of itself.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Gotta be substance. A lot of the women on dating sites are already attractive, they just lack personal skills, talents, and strengths. I don't care about your degree, salary, career, or where you went to college. I want to know what you got on the inside.

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 13

  • substance. i run into very attractive guys on dating apps who are severely lacking in substance. i think if i was looking to hook up, substance would matter much less.

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    • but are you sure they are lacking substance... or just don't see that encounter worth more effort...

      sometimes I do it... if I do it.. im sure others do it... like we just give minimal engagement for girls we don't exactly see as the one for us

  • I start with looks while swiping. But I don't really have high standards like I don't expect a Ryan Gosling. Obviously, I am not going to swipe someone unattractive to my taste or someone basically 400 pounds and obese just because I hope they have good qualities. It would be waste of time both for me and for person in question.
    Good and clean looking with a well-written bio, good education and job. Then I check how they hold a conversation if we match and talk.

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    • by the way, I don't believe in people saying "substance", especially my own kind, women. I hate people denying looks are important and act like they only care about the personality. Just lol. I dont deny. i care about looks.

  • Obviously an interesting photo draws me in but a shitty profile puts me off. I don't do online dating anymore though, fuck that shit.

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    • The short version is - appearance
      lol

    • @TripleAce I didn't say appearance. I said an interesting photo. Usually if it's of them traveling, I'm interested. Or taken somewhere fun. Showing hobbies etc. Just a selfie is boring.

  • I don't do online dating but no matter what substance is important too. And yet, ironically, I clicked on this question because of the picture. Shame on me.

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  • I value looks a lot more.

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  • Intelligence.

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  • well i have to be somewhat attracted to them but for instance
    i sorta liked this dude i thought in my head (i guess he has a nice nice) and then i found out how much we had in common and what a nice person and smart dude he was and suddenly POOF he was about 60% hotter

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  • I don't believe in online dating

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  • Both, but looks first then substance. Like does he actually like me, or just sex

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  • Substance.

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  • Substance over form

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  • looks

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  • Looks initially, but if we get talking and there's nothing there, it's not gonna go any further.

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What Guys Said 24

  • Coming from an online dating veteran with 1000+ Tinder matches:

    A huge number of online women are indeed VERY good looking (surprisingly) however in my experience they have come with SIGNIFICANT baggage: Some of the common themes I have ran into have been (1) Psychological issues, (2) Daddy issues (VERY common), (3) A sense of "me me me the world owes me" - i. e. girls that think that a guy is supposed to chase them eternally (of course guy goes poof after like 2 days)..., but the biggest one? (4) LACK OF SUBSTANCE - I have gone on countless dates now but the #1 theme has been that most girls are fall asleep boring personalities.

    In general I have chased after girls with slightly above average looks (but below very good looking) with at least a bachelor's degree with good success.

    I also always avoid: nurses, girls with SC filters, too much cleavage in pics, clearly photoshopped selfies, duck faces, single moms, the list really goes on...

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  • Both are important. I won't reach out to someone I don't find attractive but substance is definitely more important as that is the factor that will determine if an actual relationship will happen.

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  • I am all about the looks with online dating. I have had my share of girls who lied about themselves and who lied about the guy they wanted to date! They were just as critical of my looks as I was of them, only my standards were not as high! I am an open book, even on this site, and plenty of those online attempts were drilling me on my background story and information, and in the end, I suppose they felt I was lying but they proved to me they were not looking for "a nice guy" to start a relationship with!

    Oh isn't online dating sites FUN!

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  • How would you know about the drink without actually drinking it?

    Let's be honest here. Nobody knows about another person in less than 5sec. You will always have to take a dive before you know. That means you #1 impression about ANYONE will be looks.

    Sure they can have a fantastic bio but you are never sure if it's just a really polished bio or they are just good with words. Also you will never know of the pictures are real either.

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    • Well it's more the ones with the good looks and the shitty profile... bad spelling, bad grammar... will people over look that and go for the looks?

    • People will go for the looks. Not many willing to read the profile. You can test it easily.

      Take some hot pictures of some dude and write something like "I am only here to bang".

      Take an average picture of an average dude and write a super smart profile.

      Compare the results. Some girls will got for the hot dude knowing his profiles. Some girls aren't going 5o care what he has to say and just go with the pictures.

      Turn around and test it will a hot girl picture and stupid profile vs average girl and cool profile.

    • yeah i catfishes and guys didn't care about crap bio but they did think im fake which was true

  • if you refer to personal information on their profile or whatever, then no that doesnΒ΄t matter to me at all. i donΒ΄t have time to read all those profiles. the amount of matches are too low to take the time and read. i just swipe and then if i get a match i read but at first itΒ΄s not a priority.

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  • You'd be hard pressed for someone to say they care more about looks than substance. If they are like this, this is the definition of a superficial person. As well, you know what type of person you're getting if they, as well, depend on their looks or prefer looks over their substance or quality. It would also say to me they don't think much of their own self worth.

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  • majority, like maybe 85% of people go with looks...
    because they feel personality and substance can be molded to their likings but appearance will relatively always stay the same...

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  • You need both. You need to be attracted initially then you need the personality and character to set your feelings in concrete. It's just like a friendship with sex. You don't hang about with people coz they look good, you hang about with them coz you trust them and they entertain you

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  • Both, but I would be lying if I did not consider the way a Girl Looks.

    You do not have to be the "most beautiful and 'skinny' Girl" in the world, but need minimally arouse me, and of course with substance, is perfect.

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  • The women are lying their arses off.
    I am a short, average looking guy who gets told I have a great personality and sense of humour but never have I ever hooked up from an online dating site. Women go for looks, height, job title/perceived income bracket, and only then do they go for personality and a well-written profile.
    The girls saying they have to have substance over looks? Pfffft, yeah, nah.

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  • Strong substance and some real photos for the profile. (What's that term for using fake pictures?) I need to know everything that's important to know with 100% honesty. For example, I admit in my profiles that I still live with my parents and can't drive yet because my epilepsy isn't cured enough yet.

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  • I vote for option C! A woman has to have both substance and let's face it, physical attraction does play a part as well πŸ˜†

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  • everybody who doesn't say look is a liar. looks and personality are the same thing anyways...

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    • "looks and personality are the same thing anyways"

      you are probably one of the only ones I've seen in a long time that actually gets that...
      Personality is projected though appearance... I mean how do we even perceive a sense of kindness of sweetness... usually that is projected through expressions and the way the person looks...

      right on man...

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    • @TripleAce kindness projected by expression?

    • @booxfox666 yes there is two parts
      The person is actually kind and the person looks kind
      Im sure you've heard people say stuff like. That guy looks sweet, or that guy looks mean

      How do you think we perceive that when we haven't even said a word to him...

  • If I had to choose it'd be substance, but attraction is also very important. Looks are often the difference between best friend and relationship material.

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  • Last week i talked to a girl who is extremely beautiful. We started to talk and after a 24 hours I was struggling to make the conversation continue. She was so nice, interested as a person but being a nice person doesn't mean you have substance. Because of everything we could talk ended, we stopped talking. What can you do with a person you have nothing to talk with? You can't be with them just because they look amazing.

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  • Let's take both, shall we?

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  • substance all the way! can't do on looks alone. But I have given up on online dating.

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  • This is bullshit. I've got tons of substance XD girls want a boring looking guy with fuckall personality dont get it twisted.

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  • Looks and substance

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  • It's irrelevant, they're both fake.

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  • πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ what a crock of shit. Females judge on looks more then men.
    One of my best friends I grew up with fit athletic and very good looking ( played in the MLB for a couple of games) did male stripping and he had girls throwing them themselves at him single or married or with a partner. One thing I've learned is women will say one thing but the biological sense kick in and want a handsome offspring.

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  • Usually looks to some degree, I mean I need that initial attraction and even if the profile is a bit off it may not be that way in person so if they look good and are even willing to meet me then that's how I base it on

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    • I also know first hand from being on dating sites that women are worse because at least I read the messages and read their profiles but I've seen messages that I sent to them unread and deleted meaning they just went by my picture only and didn't care what I had to say in the message or view my profile

  • All women looks for looks and any woman who says they don't go for looks only is lying.

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  • Its better to look good than to feel good

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