What is with everyone wanting open relationships?

One time, a guy I was interested in suggested an open relationship--something I can't even stand. I immediately rejected him because I'm not accepting that label as an excuse for him to fuck around with other girls.

I know that guys my age don't want commitment and I get that. I want time for myself too and I don't want to overwhelmed by a relationship's demands all the time. Right now, I'd want to be in the type of relationship that is serious but isn't too serious.

Point is: I want something more than just a couple night stands but I don't want to scare away guys by giving that impression. But at college, everyone just wants to mess around. They think that the people who want serious relationships are lame but I'm just not in the mood for games, one night stands, and hurt feelings. Right now, I just don't see any guys who are worth dating anymore.

How do guys view girls who reject open relationships and want something more?


0|0

Most Helpful Guy

  • I definitely want to get into a relationship. No such thing as a “casual” relationship. Either you’re all in or non at all. I’m so glad you dumped that man because it shows you have self respect, now what you like, and don’t want to associate with people who aren’t positive. People like him, other men and women, aren’t necessarily those with grade A morals and beliefs. I’m not religious, but you NEED to be a righteous and honest person. That’s how we evolve and that’s what makes us admire other people. It’s funny because I’m of the opinion that WOMEN your age don’t want anything serious. I wish I could meet you in person Prima Dana. I think we’d be a great couple LOL 😆😉

    1|0
    0|0
    • Lol yeah I know what you mean! I also respect honesty. There were a few times in my life before that I didn't want anything too serious but once I got into something serious, (with another guy, not the one who just wanted an "open relationship") I got to experience how good it feels. Relationships aren't really that perfect but I think my first relationship was overall decent. Unfortunately it ended but oh well... there's nothing I can do about it and when another opportunity arises, I'll take it. I won't wanna rush though. I don't wanna sound proud but there are just a lot of guys at my college who aren't worth my time. They're either assholes or brick walls. Lmao I'm just very picky and an awesome personality is really important for me.

    • Show All
    • 100% agree. You’re a young, smart, and beautiful woman, you’ll definitely meet a man sooner or later. Just focus on other things for now, he’ll come along LOL.

    • Lol thanks!!! 🤗 i sure will focus on other stuff

Most Helpful Girl

  • Because people don't wanna commit. Some people want the benefits without the drawbacks. I don't agree with it either.

    0|2
    0|0

What Guys Said 28

  • Open relationships are disgusting. It's like saying "You're good enough for me but there might be something better so let's just see if I'm actually going to settle for you." It's depressing and unhealthy for both partie's ego. It feels dishonest. Fuck buddies are better, because at least then you're honest that it's only about sex.

    2|1
    0|0
  • The usual term is "whitebread." Nothing wrong with it, it's just limiting. If that's your kink; enjoy.

    Humans evolved from social primates, with no expectation of monogamy. In general, For most of our evolutionary history, sex was casual between members of the same troop. Rather like the bonobos. The more modern "civilization" is just a thin overlay.

    1|0
    0|0
  • "How do guys view girls who reject open relationships and want something more?"

    It's understandable. I don't view those girls in any negative way. Many girls are used to: Boy meets girl, boy asks girl out, boy and girl see only eachother and the relationship gets more serious from there.

    That's just the risk you make by letting her know what's up, because that's not what she's used to oftentimes. She can take it or she can leave it, but at the end of the day you're being honest about who you are and what you want. You're not pretending she's the only girl and cheating behind her back. You're giving her an honest look so she can make that decision for herself.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Get on the Bumble dating app. You'll never look back. You'll find the perfect guy you want.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Because they think everyone else is doing it behind their partner’s back, so they may as well be honest about wanting to do it too. TBH I think it’s horrible, and I would happily be monogamous friends with benefits with a woman.

    1|0
    0|0
  • College, despite the impression that it's a great dating atmosphere, is really not. There is a ton of opportunity to meet new people and mess around and guys are too distracted by these opportunities to be exclusive. It's not an excuse, just a reason you're seeing what you're seeing. Its probably a good thing, or this post would instead be about why guys cheat on you all the time, right? The only other factor can be your type of guy and where you're meeting them. Sometimes just because a guy met you at a party, he won't see you as the dating type even though you are. Likewise, super hot guys have more opportunities and they know themselves well enough not to commit to a girl because they cant/won't.
    You're best bet is to reevaluate the type of guys your meeting and where and perhaps date outside of the college scene.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I think fair enough and good for you that you know what you want. Personally I agree with you on the open relationship, I wouldn't enter one. If someone else does, then that's their business. But on the other hand, I don't have anything against one night stands or fuckbuddies or such.

    0|0
    0|0
  • That means he's not ready for a relationship in general, stay single until ready to 100% commit to someone worth it

    1|0
    0|0
  • In my opinion an open relationship isn't really a real relationship because if your allowing your partners to be with others what does that mean for you, that you aren't good enough for your own partner like is it even worth showing affection for

    1|0
    0|0
  • It's mostly guys. I do not agree with it. I guess these man hoes don't know how to value their SO's

    1|0
    0|0
  • Me being a bit older I respect the wanting a serious relationship but nowadays it's very uncommon

    1|0
    0|0
  • Like the things of beauty they are, and slaughter field dwelling animals in their appreciation for them accordingly

    0|0
    0|0
  • Don't reject a guy just because he asks for an open relationship. Watch his reaction to your disagreement and if he's cool then be cool too.

    A couple should feel comfortable throwing out ideas to each other.

    0|0
    1|0
  • Do what you feel is right hands down

    1|0
    0|0
  • Respect. Open relations is hard to handle, and normally leads to

    1|0
    0|0
  • That's actually not true, there are more people in college looking for relationships than people messing around, the ones messing around are just the "louder" ones so you tend to see them more often.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I want a serious relationship.
    No need for bullshit ones or open relationships.
    Open? Seriously? What's an open relationship other than being friends?

    0|0
    0|0
    • It's just like a closed relationship, except you're honest about your feelings of attraction and get laid more.

    • Show All
    • I'd expect you to, yes. but also let her enjoy other men, or women, as well. sometimes, enjoy them together.

    • @taleswapper why would I do that?

      I don't need to fuck random people let alone in a relationship.
      I do believe in Monogamy.

  • you want a relationship that is not too serious someone else wants open relationship and someone else fully genuine, serious relationship.. its just a preference

    0|0
    0|0
  • They are too liberal and influenced by many liberal professors in college.

    0|0
    1|0
  • Look at your age i wanted commitment, even in college i just wanted a relationship. I think you are admirable

    0|0
    0|0
  • Respect is how i see it, i am not a one night type of guy i have not had sex in 7 years i want commitment and i can wait and its paying of FUCK THE KIDS at your college they will most likely get std 35-40% of them at least you shouldn't risk it

    0|0
    0|0
  • Having an open relationship is the same as been fuck buddies. I truly don't find any difference.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Sounds like you want friends with benefits and monogamy.

    Good luck, but that's going to be difficult to find.

    0|0
    0|0
  • People are sluts

    0|0
    0|0
  • You need to find a "nice" guy! 😊

    0|1
    0|0
  • I don't blame you I would do the same

    0|0
    0|0
  • Go lesbian

    0|0
    0|0
  • It's the girls your age who don't want commitment and want time for themselves. Just like you yourself readily admit that you do, wanting a relationship that's 'serious but isn't too serious'- in other words, casual, and open to be broken off without a moment of hesitation or guilt, with total freedom to ditch the guy for any better, hotter, 'more worthy' prospective partner who presents himself at any time.

    The majority of guys, even at college, want that as well. But at college, everyone thinks that the GUYS who want serious relationships are lame. And because of that, you'll never be interested in any of them, or see any of those guys as being worthy of dating you. Because they're lame, they're unpopular, they're preoccupied with their studies and building their careers, keeping their heads down at their desks and work tables, instead of just chilling, playing games, dossing and messing around with the cool, popular guys.

    It's not that everyone wants open relationships- it's that college girls are only ever attracted to, and interested in, the guys who go around playing and fucking as many girls on campus as they can. And it seems that, for all your talk, you're exactly the same as the rest of them- a hypocrite who wants all of the freedoms, benefits and commitment of exclusivity without any investment, sacrifices, compromises or loyalty on her part. All the same...

    1|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

Loading... ;