Are dating apps really a terrible way to find a relationship?

I'm not necessarily referring to tinder? Sites like OKC, POF, Match, etc. People tell me that the people on there only want to have sex/hookup. But, you hear other stories of people getting married and such. I've always been single and am in my early twenties. I know meeting people in person is the best way, however, I am very shy and don't open up to people easily at all. I try online to see if I can break the ice easier that way. I would like a relationship since I've never had one and am somewhat depressed about this.
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Most Helpful Guy

  • From a mans POV, I think they suck. Something about a chance in person encounter goes so much farther than a profile where you are trying to sell yourself. Not to mention the weird guys that taint the water. I think most normal women have to really be highly interested to even arrange a meet. They are being choosy because they are afraid of the weirdos.

    But I also noticed another weird thing. There are a number of women consistently on in my local area. Many of the same faces still online I saw on there 4 years ago. You wonder what the hell the deal is..

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Most Helpful Girl

  • As our lives become more digital, I don't see how a dating app could be a bad thing. Sure there are always going to be duds online.

    I've done a lot of online dating over the years. It's definitely getting harder and harder to stand out in a good way online.

    Lots of people make profiles but aren't actually serious about finding someone. Or they do it just for laughs.

    I would say the best thing you can do is use apps as just another tool to met people.

    Get out and meet people in real life as well.

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What Guys Said 20

  • Relative to what? Apps (or online dating sites for desktop computers) are much better than going to lame bars or clubs, that is for sure, and not just in terms of cost and convenience.

    In terms of cost and convenience, swiping or browsing online personals sites in your spare time or in the privacy of your own home, is hard to beat.

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  • I don't think serious dating apps are terrible.
    I see those platforms as an easier way for shy people like you to get to know new people.
    I also know quiet a few couples who have met online and are in, what looks to me, like a healthy long-term relationship.

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  • I would try to offer an objective, informative, educational, and perhaps even profound answer to your question but it simply sounds like to much effort if you consider the only reason I'm here is because I want to have sex with you. Sorry about that.

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  • Yes, I would say so because most people on there are looking to hookup and a lot of girls on there are just on there for attention and validation to boost their egos. I have tried it and no apps worked for me because, Im "too ugly"

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  • I think you have a better chance on social media (facebook, IG etc) than actual dating apps tbh.

    To me guys mostly use dating apps for hookups and not to look for love or long-term relationship.

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  • I am so dissapointed in today's dating apps as well. They provide no solutions whatsoever. Someone please invent a dating app for socially awkward people. i feel you 100%

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  • You just need to be careful and selective some there are all types online. Some very real and some very shallow and fake.

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  • I am 'old' so have a cynicism to the Net. Do not trust it to be real to a large degree. As for dating on it-not my scene

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  • There are still many decent people on dating sites like Okc for example...

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  • Not necessarily, but you're gonna get a lot more guys who just want sex

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  • I know how you feel. Dating apps seem like they are the best option for people who are timid when it comes to meeting people. It's fine to experiment with it but for me, personally, I just couldn't do it. Talking to people I don't know very well is somewhat difficult for me but I find that trying to talk over text or snapchat loses any kind of personal connection. Something about not actually having the person in front of me is just off putting. And I completely understand that, being in your early twenties, having a relationship is something to be desired. I've experienced the same depression you're feeling but you have to realize that having a relationship or not doesn't make you any better or worse than anyone else. Find thingd that make you happy and just enjoy the things you like to do. Relationships aren't ment to be forced, they just happen.

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  • They work just gotta play it smart and safe.

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  • Yeah, theyre superficial.

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  • Waste of time

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  • I joined several and it felt like a waste of time

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  • I've heard mixed things

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  • Kinda

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  • Try GAG its better than all

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  • I tried it didn't work for me until now. Been trying it for 7 month.
    I have only managed to meet 3 REAL girls who only turned out to wanting sucking my dick and have sex.

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  • Excellent way to reconnect with people from your past. I'd never join one but I have used them, to see who's there and their stance in life. Sad story, but a true one

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What Girls Said 16

  • Its possible to find someone wanting something serious, my co-worker did. Her and her guy have been together for around two years now.

    That said, I tried several sites as well and the only guys that ever messaged me were creepy old men and guys my age wanting a hook up. I swore off online dating, its definitely not for me.

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  • I think it’s possible, it’s really just another way to meet people and branch further out from your own social group. Where you meet someone has no bearing on the success of a relationship, but online dating tends to have a lot more low quality people because it’s cheap, it’s easy and they can do it for years with no cost to themselves.
    I met my husband online, and know others who have cultivated long term relationships but I know just as many who have had no luck

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  • dating sites are luck n destiny.

    i met my man there, and none of us was there for relationship actually, just for curiosity.

    to avoid the creepy guys, or those who want only sex, you need experience.

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  • The experience is what you make of it. You can find hookups if that’s what you want. You can also find a serious relationship (even on Tinder). You just have to be explicit with what you want.

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  • @suitandtie a good read after our discussion.

    I think there are a few reputable sites where you could find people interested in serious relationships but a lot of those I think are mostly for hookups or short term casual flings.

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  • Usually people get on there to swap nudes, hookup, or sext. Not saying it isn't possible. I don't think it's the best way.

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  • I think so. You never know who you are really talking to online. You also don't know what led them to go to the online route either.

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  • I have had great success meeting guys on dating sites including a very serious long term relationship. Ok it didn't work out but for same reasons as why any other relationship may not work out. Dating sites is what you make of it and who you choose to click or swipe on. I have in my years of on and off dating sites never encountered a man who used me for sex or anything because I do not hookup. By being smart you can easily weed out bad people. I am currently semi dating 2 wonderful men and that I met on Tinder. Very early stages but bottom line, there are gems on there.

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  • Yes and no because i joined a dating app before and there are a lot of guys there who just wants to hook up or fake/poser people but i met my first boyfriend there and we are currently dating. I could say I’m lucky that I met a decent guy there.

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  • I know many people who began their relationships from dating apps.

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  • Yes and a woman like me doesn't need dating websites to get a man.

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  • I’ve heard mixed things and I’ve experienced mixed results. My current boyfriend is someone I met on OKC and it’s the best relationship I’ve ever had, but not all of them are like that. For example, he has shared many online date horror stories of his own and they’re pretty bad. My best friend dates online a lot and hasn’t really had good experiences either, he says many of the girls ended up being crazy (same as real life, too, I guess).

    It’s honestly just luck if you find a good guy/gal when trying to find a date online. Just have to take precautions to ensure your safety if you’re planning on meeting up with any of them. Dating sites like OKC, POF, and Tinder have a higher possibility that the members are just looking for a hookup - especially if their profiles are less detailed and their pictures are on the shallow side.. like drawing attention to their body and are more revealing. Sites like Match, where you need to pay to get to know members, are less likely to match you up with someone looking for a hookup alone.

    Online dating seems bad, but in today's society it's the easiest way to meet potential suitors and it's not all bad.

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  • yes because most people don't look for a date but sex

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  • I've had real good luck on tinder believe it or not lol.

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  • I don't feel like it's even safe to be meeting people on dating apps.
    I'm waiting to meet a guy through mutual friends or some other social situation and I know I might be waiting a looooong time.

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  • OKC is horrible. POF is hit and miss. Some want hook-ups, but some want relationships/dating. Any site that you have to pay for will be a site with less people looking for hook-ups, so I would try one of those first of looking for a real relationship.

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