How do you start the process of dating your ex?

I dated him in the past (almost 3 years ago) and broke things off with him very early in the relationship. Not because there was anything wrong with him or the relationship in general. Deep down I always regretted it because he was everything I could have asked for. We’ve always kept in touch. For the past couple of months, we’ve been hanging out. Recently I admitted that I had feelings for him again. He always brings it up wanting to talk about it. He has also been trying to kiss me, but I don’t know how he feels, so that stops me from doing anything. We’re comfortable in each other’s presence, and he always finds a way to be touching me or leaning on me, but for me talking about what’s really happening between us and feelings is hard to do. How should I go about asking what he wants, and how he feels? Sometimes it’s hard to find the right words. It’s also “new” territory because in a sense you don’t know each other anymore. What do I doooooooo?

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What Guys Said 1

  • Have a conversation with yourself and be sure first. Any action you take after you've convinced yourself will pick the right course in your relationship.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Sometimes you just have to be stright out with it. He's your ex, you are familiar with him, and you deserve to know how he is feeling about you, about this few friendship/relationship you have going on. Talk with him. The first rule of relationships is communication, and if you're having difficulties bringing this personal question up to him, then it's something you NEED to work on as soon as possible.
    I'm sure he will understand you asking, but do be sure you really what to retry this relationship with him before asking him. He may just want to become friends with benefits type of thing, where you guys share intimacy, go on dates, hangout but don't share an actual relationship. He could just be trying to hook up with you, maybe he is after trying the relationship again but you have to be sure to ask before it's too late and you get hurt again.

    Do be aware that relationships change greatly after breakups. Things will never go back to how they once were, and even we as people grow, change, develop new interests, and seek more than what we had previously. If you're serious about this guy, and you still do have feelings for him, make sure you are okay with allowing him to know that. Because if not, he could possibly use those feelings to manipulate your heart in different ways, or lead you on. It depends on what he's after.

    Set a time somewhere quiet for you two to speak in private. Maybe have him over for a dinner and discuss things between the two of you. Ask him if he's seeing anyoe, or has he found someone he's into lately. Tell him you want to know how he feels about the two of you and what he sees in the future. Depending on his answer, you can bring up how you feel too and make sure you tell him what you want to get out in the open.

    I hope things go well, and benefit you on your behalf. Best wishes!

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